Love is Stupid and You're Stupid - TangoMcGrand - 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys (2024)

Chapter 1: Two Many Enemies

Chapter Text

•Flashback to when Yoonmin were friends~•

Yoongi lies on the floor of Jungkook's bedroom tossing a hackysack he had found up above his head and catching it with the kind of exasperated boredom that can only be reached through years of experience. He is pretty sure there is a dent in the floor that is Yoongi-shaped from how often he has been in this position, staring up at the ceiling while Jungkook watches him from his bed. It is funny that it is the fact that Jungkook does not care about his problems, that draws Yoongi to complain to him in the first place. There is a comfort in that; a consistency. That, and the fact that he has known Jungkook for almost his entire life.

Not much has changed in this room over the years. The carpet has aged, starting as an off-white and fading to almost beige. Yoongi thinks that he knows Jungkook's room better than he knows his own. Of course, Yoongi had actually redecorated his room, while Jungkook had his room set up in exactly this order since he had been eight years old. There is a familiarity that hangs around with the dust in Jungkook's room; a familiarity that simultaneously makes Yoongi feel cozy and yet nostalgic. The damn kid is growing up fast, and Yoongi would be complaining about that probably if his mouth were not already preoccupied complaining about Jimin's girlfriend.

Yoongi had tried to like Yunseo at first, he really had, and in fact the first couple months had gone relatively smoothly. Yunseo was friendly enough, had a nice laugh, and most importantly Jimin seemed to like her. However, eventually Yoongi had begun to notice things. Things like the way he would overhear Jimin talk to her, with muted smiles and passive phrases, or the way Jimin would come to school stressed but resigned on an almost daily basis. Yunseo had seemed friendly upon first meeting, but Yoongi couldn't help side-eyeing her.

“It's just, I don't understand how Jimin doesn't see it.” Yoongi says, staring up at the ceiling, the back of his head resting heavily on the carpet. “I mean, Jimin and I have been looking forward to going to that concert for months and she just guilts him out of it because she got a bad grade on her test and wants him to cheer her up? Like what the hell is her problem? Do you know how expensive those tickets were? We've been planning this for months! Why is he okay with staying behind?”

Yoongi thinks that if it came to it he would be supportive of Jimin getting into a healthy relationship with a nice person, but he is 98% sure Yunseo is manipulative, inattentive, and possibly very evil.“He's going to be missing Pixie Attack.” Yoongi sighs angrily. “He's the one that got me into the band in the first place. What the hell Jungkook.”

“Yeah.” Jungkook flippantly affirms from somewhere over on his bed.

“And like,” Yoongi continues, eyes focused on the ceiling, “This isn't the first time that this has happened; Jimin is canceling plans all the time, and most of the time it's because he's trying to make it up to his girlfriend for not canceling his other plans for her. Jimin barely spends any time with us anymore because he's too busy placating Yunseo. I think she might be the worst person I know.”

“She's the worst.” Jungkook confirms.

“Also, what's with that thing where she won't let Jimin talk to other girls because they're dating now? I know it's a popular thing among The Straights^TM, but still. Like that's so messed up. She won't even let Jimin talk to Irene and they've been friends for years. What, does she think that every other girl is a threat to her simply because they're also girls? I mean obviously she does think that, but does she think that Jimin can't control himself around other women? Should I be offended that she thinks my friend would cheat on her at the drop of the hat?”

“There's something wrong with heterosexuals.” Jungkook comments.

“You're telling me.” Yoongi digresses, staring at the ceiling agitated.

Yoongi lasts about five seconds of angrilly brewing in silence before he sits himself up to look more directly at Jungkook who is sitting on his bed, homework untouched on his lap, pen hovering idly over the paper. “And another thing,” Yoongi begins again, even though he had said these things to Jungkook countless times already. “She's always acting like anything bad that happens between them is Jimin's fault, like just the other day they couldn't agree on a movie to watch and she wouldn't talk to him for days until he bought her chocolates and wrote her a formal apology on a pink slip of paper. They had a stupid fight but only Jimin has to apologize? And she completely shut him out over it. Like relationships are supposed to be mutual, right? Am I crazy?”

Jungkook puts his pencil between his teeth and co*cks his head to the side as he considers Yoongi. He takes thepencilback out. “You're not crazy, but you shouldtalk to Jimin about this.” Jungkook tells him.

Yoongi sighs and tips his head back to mope at his best friend: the ceiling. “I try, but it's so hard, he never takes me seriously,” he sulks. He's is quiet for a second, hackysack immobile in his hand as he clenches it tightly. Of course, there could be a reason Jimin didn't listen to him that Yoongi was loath to admit. Yoongi was biased as hell, even from the beginning. Jimin getting a girlfriend in the first place had come as a shock, and Yoongi had originally intended to be supportive, but seeing her around Jimin would make his stomach turn uncomfortably. He sighs.“What if I just don't like her because I'm jealous?.”

Jungkook groans. “Yoongi. Jimin's girlfriend sucks. Literally everyone agrees.”

“Then why doesn't anyone else say anything.” Yoongi mopes.

Jungkook chews on the end of his pencil. “Soekjin and Hoseok talk to him about it all the time.”

Yoongi groans, “They don't do it right. They're too understanding.”

“Yeah.” Jungkook says. Yoongi looks up at Jungkook with an exaggerated pout and Jungkook easily dismisses him. “Now can you shut up about this and help me with my math already?”

“Hm?” Yoongi hums distractedly, he'd forgotten that Jungkook had actually invited him over in the first place to help him out with his schoolwork. Yoongi doesn't even remember how he had gotten to this position on the floor. All he remembers is how much he dislikes Jimin's girlfriend. “Oh yeah, sorry.” he tells Jungkook, still sitting on the floor.

Jungkook shakes his head disapprovingly and the bed squeaks, “Apologies don't pass trigonometry tests,” he says, “now get off the floor and explain cosine law to me, chop chop.”

. . .

It bothers Yoongi for almost another month before he decides to confront Jimin about his girlfriend. Again. He's secretly hoping that they'll break up without his direct intervention; Jimin will just realize on his own that his girlfriend is terrible. But that just doesn't happen. What does happen is that Jimin grows more and more distant everyday and Yoongi starts panicking. By the time Yoongi gathers up the courage to actually make plans with Jimin, he hasn't actually seen Jimin in over a week.

But Yoongi has to put himself out there, for Jimin's sake.

And so Yoongi texts Jimin that he has to talk to him. The text goes something like “Hey, I really need to talk to you asap and if you say you're busy because you're hanging out with your girlfriend I will probably not hesitate to kill a man. When are you free?” Jimin texts back in a matter of minutes telling Yoongi that may be be able to convince his girlfriend to let him meet up with Yoongi today if it's that important. Yoongi takes that as a victory and he punches the air. Namjoon gives him a weird look.

Of course, like all victories in Yoongi's life, this one comes at a price. Jimin is late and Yoongi is once again inadvertently reminded that Jimin's girlfriend is the actual priority.

Yoongi sits patiently at his locker for almost twenty minutes before Jimin shows up. The first thing he says to Yoongi as he approaches him is “My girlfriend is pissed that I canceled lunch plans with her, can we make this quick?”

The butterflies that suddenly fly around his stomach as Jimin addresses him are more than excessive and sort of frustrating. Or maybe Yoongi is actually just frustrated by the way Jimin is looking down at him like his existence is an inconvenience. It is disorienting to see Jimin looking at him so impatiently, when Yoongi is pretty sure he hasn't even done anything wrong yet. Jimin's eyes don't exactly look cold, but they don't look warm either and Yoongi doesn't really know what to make of that but it kind of pisses him off.

Yoongi leans his head back to look up at Jimin, arms resting on his knees.“Wow nice to see you too.” Yoongi says, taking the passive aggressive approach.There's an ambient buzz of student's chattering somewhere down the hall that Yoongi barely registers.

Jimin sighs and leans against a locker across from Yoongi. “Yoongi,” he says, shoulders sagging and hair falling out if place in front of his eyes, “I'm really stressed right now so can you cool it with the judgment?”

Yoongi's feels himself get progressively more irritated. Of course Jimin is stressed; he had just asked Yunseo for something and she was a heartless vacuum of soullessness that could suck the light out of even the sun himself. “And why are you stressed?” Yoongi begins, before running his tongue over his teeth. “Is it by chance your girlfriend? Again?”

Yoongi could have predicted Jimin's response perfectly, right down to the way that Jimin's jaw tightens and the way his eyes flicker away from Yoongi to look out the window at the other side of the hall. His expression becomes guarded, “Please don't start.” he says. Yoongi may have been able to predict this response, but he couldn't have prevented it. He still has no idea how to handle the way Jimin defensively clams up every time Yoongi mentions his girlfriend.

Yoongi blows air out of his mouth, letting his head fall back and clang against his locker. “I'm not starting anything.” he says innocently, then he rolls his head to face the empty hallway. “God forbid I question your girlfriend.” he says, half under his breath.

. . .

Yoongi is back on Jungkook's floor again a week later.

"It's just, I feel like nothing's changed." he is saying, hands spread out by his sides, picking at the carpet with his fingertips. Jungkook is on his laptop this time, sitting cross legged on the floor with Yoongi's head pressing lightly against his knee. Jungkook makes an affirmative noise to signify the fact that he heard Yoongi speak, and the clicking sound of his keyboard starts up again. In the spaces where Yoongi is thinking about how to word something, he will hear Jungkook tapping away at his keyboard, like he had other things to do rather than just wait for Yoongi to figure out how to word things. It's comforting; there's never any pressure when Yoongi is around Jungkook.

“I mean,” Yoongi begins and the clicking immediately stops, “I got him to actually plan to eat lunch with us every Tuesdays, but it feels like the bare minimum. He's taken Yunseo giving him permission to eat lunch with his friends as likea sign of progress or Yunseo's inner kindness or something. Like asking her for something and not getting insulted for it means that their relationship can't be totally f*cked anymore.I feel like I set this whole thing up for Yunseo, like I Just handed her a shining contract that said 'hey if you agree to this then it will be even harder for me toconvinceJimin that you're terrible.'"

Yoongi stops talkingto huff annoyed, and turn his cheek into the carpet in frustration, looking out across Jungkook's knees. Jungkook makes an understanding humming noise and the irregular rhythm of the keyboard clicking starts up again. It's a relaxing noise, a white noise that reminds Yoongi that he has Jungkook, or it could just be Jungkook's presence that's relaxing.

Actually, as Yoongi thinks about it more as Jungkook continues to type, he begins to think that maybe the noise shouldn't be relaxing. Jungkook is a little sh*t, and as such he could be writing anything while Yoongi speaks. Terrible things. Jungkook could be writing Yoongi's rant down word for word to post on his blog and drag him for it. Yoongi wouldn't put that past Jungkook. The kid is terrifying.

“What are you even typing?” Yoongi asks, curiosity getting the better of him. He sits himself up, and turns himself around, to try to peer over the edge of the laptop and read the screen upside down. It's a word document but that's all that Yoongi can see.

Jungkook doesn't look up from his laptop. “A love letter.” he sayscasually.

Yoongi feels his own face screw up in disbelief. “Wait, seriously?” he says and Jungkook shrugs. Yoongi ends up scooting himself all the way over to sit cross-legged beside Jungkook and peer over his shoulder as he types. It is indeed a letter. He notes that it is addressed to “trash hat” it says:

“Hey Trash Hat,

Ur dumb and ur face looks kind of like a marshmallow... but in a good way i guess, anyway we should probably make out...”

The letter continues but Yoongi doesn't read it. “Jungkook, what the f*ck.” he says.

Jungkook shrugs from beside him and continues typing in the word document: 'you're really obnoxious tho' he writes and Yoongi sighs.

“This is what you were doing the entire time I was talking? Who is this for?” Yoongi asks. “Were you even listening?”

“A girl in my class, and I was listening too.” Jungkook protests, “You were talking about Jimin.”

Yoongi bites his lip to stop from smiling affectionately about how terrible Jungkook is “Yeah, whatever,” he says, “you want my love advice?”

“You've been pining after Jimin for over a year and you can't even get him to break up with his girlfriend, no thank you.” Jungkook tells him rudely.

“Ah, kid I should hit you.” Yoongi comments and Jungkook snickers, “But you're right my advice was to just give up.”

Jungkook's hands still on the keyboard and he looks almost sad for a second, “I think I have.” he says.

Yoongi considers Jungkook for a moment, “On second thought,” he says, “that's a terrible idea, ask whoever you're writing that letter to the f*ck out, idiot.”

Jungkook scoffs, “Screw you.” then he pauses, "Listen," he says, "I'll ask out my crush when you ask out Jimin, yeah?"

Yoongi frowns, "I'm not the best role model for romanticendeavors." he says.

"Exactly." Jungkook says, "So let me write my hopeless letter inpiece. Talk to me when you've confessed to Jimin."

"So, never?" Yoongiclarifies.

"Never." Jungkook confirms

**********************

•Four years after ~the incident~•

**********************

Yoongi thinks the new girl looks a lot like Jimin and maybe that is why he has been staring at her for the past fifteen minutes. He has not seen Jimin in years but there is something familiar about the slope of the girl's eyes and the softness of her cheeks. Even the way she walks reminds Yoongi distinctly of Jimin in a way that makes his stomach churn and sends pangs of nostalgia through his heart. It definitely brings back old memories that Yoongi absolutely has never wanted to think about again, stirs up old hurt and anger, and Yoongi almost feels bile come up his throat and his eyes prickle in irritation.

But then someone taps Yoongi's stomach softy and he looks over to see the restaurants expediter Wendy looking over at him amused, “Dude, stop staring at the new girl and get back to work you damn weirdo.” she tells Yoongi, smiling.

Yoongi blinks a few times, slowly coming back to earth, as he realizes that even four years later, seeing someone that looked like Jimin still made him emo. “Oh sorry,” he says, “I spaced out there for a while.”

Wendy gives him a knowing smile, “She's cute huh?”

Yoongi glances back over to the new girl who is talking to a table of about six, he thinks that the new girl looks like an asshole, specifically Park Jimin. “I guess.” he says.

“Her name is Kim Minji,” Wendy tells him, “She's super sweet, I think you're going to love her.”

Yoongi had half expected to the girl to be Park Minji and she was just the female doppleganger of Jimin. He doesn't know if he can ever like someone who looks like Jimin, even though he probably shouldn't dislike somebody he's never even talked to before. Minji had already built up a reputation for being a super friendly and outgoing person. Yoongi really shouldn't hate her on sight.

But then again Jimin had also been super friendly and outgoing, and Jimin had also been a horrible f*cking person so Yoongi can think whatever he wants of the new girl.

“Yeah, I'm sure she's great.” he says.

. . .

Yoongi finds Jungkook hanging out in a corner kitchen in his waiter uniform on his break, watching the staff and snacking on some rice that Taehyung had probably given him. Yoongi abandons his grill to make his way over to Jungkook.He casually leans on the counter beside Jungkook and conspiringly whispers into his ear, “Yo, the new girl looks a crazy amount like Jimin doesn't she?”

Jungkook eye's move slowly to side-eye Yoongi, growing emphatically wider and his mouth stuffed with rice. He's giving Yoongi one of his Jungkook™ looks like a baby deer caught in the headlights who is simultaneously really weirded out.

“What? She totally does.” Yoongi tells him.

Jungkook levels him with the same look for another short while. “I suppose.” he says with rice threatening to fall out of his mouth.

“No way, don't tell me you don't see it.” Yoongi says affronted.

“I mean I guess I can see it,” Jungkook says looking out the kitchen window to where the new girl is probably working. “But I mean I saw the real Jimin just yesterday though, when's the last time you saw him, three, four years ago?”

“Four,” Yoongi corrects, and thank goodness for those four years of bliss. “But that doesn't change the fact that she looks just like him.”

Jungkook shrugs and moves his spoon around his rice boredly, “I mean I guess. Maybe you're just seeing Jimin everywhere because you miss him.”

Yoongi suppresses the theatrical gag that threatens to emerge every time Jungkook says something like this. “No,” he says instead, “That is not it at all.”

Jungkook looks at him strangely from the corner of his eye. “You said you liked him once though, like you were head over heels for him pal, and then you suddenly refused to talk to him after you went over to his house that one time? I still have no idea what happened but that's totally weird, you know that right?”

Yoongi decides it was actually a horrible idea to bring this up to Jungkook. He'd thought casually bringing up Jimin would mark him healing from the event, and not him ever actually forgetting what Jimin did – who Jimin was.“I don't want to talk about this.” Yoongi says, “She just looks freakishly like Jimin and I have no idea how you can't see it, just forget I said anything, f*ck.”

Jungkook shrugs, “I mean I do see it,” he looks back over to Yoongi and the corners of his mouth twitch upwards before he smiles smugly, “kind of.”

“I don't even know why I talk to you.” Yoongi mutters, “Get back to work! There are customers waiting.”

“I'm on break, you get back to work.” Jungkook replies easily, stuffing more rice into his mouth.

Yoongi makes a face and mumbles something about the younger generation as he turns on his toes and heads back to his section of the kitchen.

. . .

“Yoongi right?” A high cartoonish voice says that Yoongi doesn't recognize says from somewhere to his right. Yoongi turns and finds himself facing the new girl. She has her blonde hair tied up in pigtails, her fringe bangs and loose hair strands framing her face. Up close the new girl looks even more ridiculously like Jimin and Yoongi almost does a second take except that the way she's looking at him looks vaguely irked and a little bit frazzled so Yoongi decides to push aside the fact that he's weirded out for the time being.“Can you move?” The new girl asks.

Yoongi looks distractedly down at his body to find himself standing right in front of the storage room door. “Oh,” he says surprised, “I'm sorry I must have spaced out.” He had been thinking about Jimin. Again. God damn it Yoongi. The new girl had brought up memories of Jimin and Yoongi thinks she should feel bad.

Minji looks at him unimpressed, “Okay?” she says looking at him expectantly and Yoongi realizes that he had missed his cue to get out of the way.

He side steps Minji, and she brushes past him dismissively. “Sorry,” he says to the door that shuts behind her. Yoongi had definitely heard from his coworkers that the new girl was friendly and kind and this girl certainly did not come across to him as such. The words “rude” and “dismissive” certainly came to mind. But then again, maybe she had just been stressed out. Yoongi can give the girl the benefit of the doubt this once, even if she looks like Jimin.

. . .

Yoongi decides he needs to make a formal introduction to the girl because, as it is, he is the only person in the restaurant that has not ever had a conversation with Minji (almost like she is avoiding him). He finds her in the kitchen one day, on her phone, and decides to talk to her then.

“Minji?” he asks curiously and the girl barely gives him a side glance. She does smile, but only very sarcastically and for just a fraction of a second, and then she goes back to her phone. Yoongi has never seen Minji be so dismissive to anyone before. He'd even seen other people introduce themselves to her and none of them had gotten this treatment. “I just wanted to introduce myself since we're going to be working together, I'm-”

Minji cuts him off, “Yoongi.” she finishes. “I know who you are, and you work as a cook and me as a waitress so I don't think introductions need to be done.” She doesn't even bother to look up from her phone and Yoongi tries not to be too affronted but what the f*ck is her problem.

“Okay, whatever.” Yoongi says provoked, “Seems like trying to get to know you as my coworker is a waste of time to you.”

“Yes. You're very observational.” Minji says boredly at her phone. Yoongi kind of hates her.

. . .

Minji is standing in front of the spices in the pantry doing something on her phone. Normally this would just be annoying, and Yoongi wouldn't give her so much as a second glance, but she happens to be directly in front of the curry powder which is what Yoongi needs to refill his stock with. Ignoring all the sirens in his head that go off whenever he gets near people that hate him, Yoongi presses forward and moves to the end of the pantry. As luck would have it, Minji seems to be steadfastly ignoring him and doesnotregister that she is in the way. Yoongi doesn't really want to interact with her and so he follows his instinct to gently touch Minji's arm to signal herto move.

That turns out to be a mistake. Minji backs out of his touch as if Yoongi's hands are radioactive, jerking her arm away with an affronted glare to match.Yoongi, who had already started reaching for the curry powder actually does a double take. Minji is looking at him like he is a mass of larva in a cook's uniform rather than a coworker, phone held close to her chest defensively and eyes narrowed.

When Minji notices Yoongi blinking uncomprehendingly at her shehisses,“Please keep your hands to yourself," eyeing Yoongi.

Yoongi blinks, “It's okay, I don't have cooties.” he says.

“You could have just asked me to move.” Minji snaps.

“I, um, I'll remember that next time.” Yoongi says slowly.

Minji huffs, eyeing the door as she seems to plan her escape “Good.” she says, and then she's out of the room faster than sound.

Yoongi watches the doors close. “Right.” he says to no one.

. . .

“Minji is so sweet!” enthuses Seulgi to the kitchen as they're preparing to open up the store in the morning. “Look, she got me this coffee mug because I kept complaining about my favourite one being broken! It even has a little piggie on it like my old one did. She said she saw in in the store and thought of me!” Seulgi bounces back and forth on her toes as she extends the cup out to Wendy who takes it and turns it over in her hands reveringly. Yoongi can't help but make a face at the two of them.

“This is actually amazing.” Wendy says beaming handing the cup back, “I love Minji. She's so thoughtful.”

“I know what you mean!” Seulgi squeals, “I feel like I should repay her somehow but she just said my smile was enough?"

Yoongi doesn't want to rain on their parade, but he also definitely wants to rain on their parade. Minji had been incredibly dismissive and rude to him from day one, and it confuses and frustrates him to hear everyone else speak so highly of her. Yoongi interrupts their conversation, turning away from his prep work for the day to offer his important insights. “Minji has been nothing but rude to me.” he tells them.

Seulgi and Wendy both turn to Yoongi giving him the same expression; suspended disbelief. Wendy lets her mouth hang open like she wants to say something but doesn't know what. Yoongi presses his lips together and lets the weight of what he had just said settle in their blissfully ignorant minds. So young, so innocent. Tragic.

After staring at Yoongi for a considerable amount of time, eventually Wendy speaks. “Minji?” she asks incredulously.

Yoongi nods.

“Rude?”

Yoongi nods again.

Wendy squints. “The Minji that just bought Seulgi a mug for no reason other than that she remembered that she wanted one?” she asks.

“The very same.” Yoongi confirms.

“Are you absolutely sure we're talking about the same Minji?” Seulgi asks.

Yoongi shrugs, “Unless another Minji works here, then yes.” Yoongi tells them.

Wendy's tongue presses against the inside of her cheek. “What does she even do that's so rude?” she asks curiously.

Yoongi doesn't really know how do explain it, he'll do his damn hardest to try. He raises the pitch of his voice to do a terrible impersonation of Minji, “ 'if you have time to talk to me you're not doing your job' or 'don't bother me while I'm working, thanks'.”

Wendy squints at Yoongi and Seulgi studies him with wide eyes, eventually Wendy speaks, “Are you paraphrasing or-?” she stops and lets the question hang in the air.

“No, I swear on my signed Kanye West album, she's said those exact words to me.” Yoongi says.

“Does she hate you? What did you do to her?” Seulgi asks taken aback.

“Absolutely nothing, honest to god. I have no idea why she's like this to me.”

Wendy and Seulgi both eye him skeptically, like they think Yoongi is leaving something out and Yoongi almost believes that he must be too. But he isn't. He's wracked his mind a million times for the answers to the same questions that Wendy and Seulgi must be asking themselves. Minji just doesn't like him, and is very adamant about expressing that dislike and Yoongi has no idea what he could have done wrong.

“I can even do a demonstration for you guys,” Yoongi tells them seriously, “do you know if Minji works today?”

. . .

Minji is supposed to come in for work that day an hour after Yoongi is supposed to leave, but since Minji usually arrives half an hour early, Yoongi figures he can just stick around the entrance to the kitchen in a t-shirt and jeans, with his uniform in his bag, until she arrives. He sees Minji arrive and, as par for the course, she doesn't even look at him. Instead she looks steadfastly ahead of herself, as if Yoongi isn't there at all. Yoongi isn't having that. He greets her with a chipper, “Hey Minji!” Seulgi and Wendy watch in anticipation from he sidelines.

“Go home, Yoongi.” Minji says, without even looking up as she passes him, wind in her hair. Yoongi makes meaningful eye contact with each Wendy and Seugli as they look at him in shock and he shrugs.

. . .

After a few weeks of silence, and several dark glares from Minji they were so full of contempt that they shouldn't exist in this mortal realm of existence, Yoongi decides to confront Minji. He is really clueless as to just what the hell is going on with her and he is tired of pretending like it is not affecting him. He finds her laughing about something with Jungkook while on break and feels an almost possessiveness creep up in his chest. Rationally he knows that Minji and Jungkook should get along seeing as they are coworkers and Jungkook gets along with everyone, but it still manages to get under his skin. Jungkook, first and foremost, has been friends with Yoongi for basically his entire life, and so if someone hatesYoongi groundlessly, Jungkook should hate them too on principle. But Jungkook doesn't hate Minji. In fact he and Minji get along brilliantly.

Yoongi makes eye contact with Jungkook as he makes his way over, and Jungkook nods at him in greeting, still smiling about whatever him and Minji had been talking about. Minji turns around to see who Jungkook is looking at, and the first thing she does as she sees Yoongi is groan. The next thing she does is make a move to leave, but Yoongi calls out to make her stop.

“Minji.” Yoongi says and Minji shoots him a glare. “I need to talk to you.”

Minji rolls her eyes and crosses her arms “About what?” she asks with unwarranted exasperation, a sharp contrast to her earlier delighted giggling while she talked to Jungkook. Jungkook looks between the two of them with wide eyes and raised eyebrows, and then gets the heck out of there. Yoongi doesn't even blame him.

Yoongi shakes his head to clear it “Why do you hate me?” he asks.

Minji sighs and crosses her arms, looking out into the kitchen instead of at Yoongi. “Why do you insist on talking to me? You can just ignore me, we'd both be happier that way.”

Yoongi shifts his footing beneath him. “Seriously?" he asks"What is your problem with me?”

“You can't handle one person not liking you?” Minji says, eyes flickering to Yoongi as she swallows and then back to the kitchen behind Yoongi. Yoongi reels.It doesn't come as a surprise, more like a final nail in the coffin. It is so casual, like it has not been Yoongi's source of inner conflict for over a month. "I have to get back to work soon, so I hope you didn't have anything more important to talk to me about because I have to go." Minji just continues like she has not said anything noteworthy, “It's kind of delusional of you to think that everyone has to like you, just some advice for the future for you, you don't have to thank me.”

Minji really really hates him. Yoongi can see it in the way she avoids his eye, eyes flickering around the kitchen and jaw set tight. He can hear it in the falsely patient tone she uses with him, like she's itching to either punch him, berate him, or leave immediately. Yoongi definitely doesn't think everyone likes him, or even should like him, in fact he's pretty sure that there are people that dislike him with full reason to. But no one has hated him so baselessly and so vehemently. It sets an uncomfortable heavy weight in his chest, that burns like fire and threatensto come out of his mouth as the venom that poisons him. “What have I ever done to you?” hedemands.

“Maybe I don't like assholes.” Minji replies distantly, tapping her crossed arm with her index fingerimpatiently.

“How am I an asshole to you?” Yoongi asks incredulously.

“You don't have to have done something to me specifically for me to know that you are an asshole.” Minji all but spits. “Are we done now? Can I go?”

Yoongi blinks at the girl in front of him uncomprehending, Minji looks him back finally, right in the eye like a challenge. “Yeah.” Yoongi says eventually, “Sure, whatever, sorry I bothered you.” Minji doesn't respond, she just exhalesangrilly and walks away.

. . .

Yoongi had thought that the amount that he didn't like Minji was enough. She is rude, yes, and annoying, but she is also easy to ignore. At least she was before she developed a new habit ofwhispering in Yoongi's ear as she passes him to put the dishes in the dishpit. The first time it takes Yoongi completely by surprise. Yoongi is just minding his own business, grilling meat as per his job description, when someone slides by his ear and whispers “You're an asshole.” just loud enough so Yoongi can hear and no one else can.

“Excuse me?” Yoongi turns his head immediately, just in time to see Minji walking away as if nothing had happened, and he is so caught off guard that he just ends up staring at the back of her head.

The second time it happens it also catches Yoongi off guard. This time when Minji sweeps by him with a casual whispered “you're an asshole.” Yoongi replies with a slightly delayed “go f*ck yourself” aimed at Minji's back. That gets the attention of the a few of the cooks around him who look at him as if he's the rude one in that scenario.

The third time Minji calls him an asshole unprompted Yoongi just responds with a “f*ck you” aimed at the grill because he hasn't even bothered to look up.

The fourth time Minji switches up her wording and instead lingers by Yoongi's ear just long enough to say, “Min Yoongi, you're a f*cking asshole.” before disappearing again. Yoongi is just annoyed enough to look up, knowing full well that Minji will have already started walking away, and say “Seriously f*ck off.”

At some level Yoongi knows that he's only escalating the situation by responding and letting Minji get to him, but at the same time Minji really pisses him off and getting called an asshole on the semi-regular is not something that Yoongi is just going to sleep on. The next time Minji sweeps by him and whispers in his ear Yoongi reaches out to grab her arm to pull her back from just walking away from him again. The murderous glare she gives him for even touching her is almost enough to satisfy Yoongi, but he still looks her directly in the eye and tells her, “And you're a god damned coward.”

Serves her right for trying to be slick and only insulting Yoongi in private. The look Minji gives Yoongi is one of pure loathing as she narrows her eyes and jerks her arm away.

As if to prove that she is not a coward, the next time Minji calls Yoongi an asshole is in front of the entire kitchen. It's still early in the day and Yoongi is just finishing up with his preparatory work when Minji calls to him from the other side of the kitchen. “Hey Yoongi.” She says, and everyone in the kitchen looks up as if they had been called, because usually if someone is at one end of the kitchen shouting, that means they are supposed to listen.

Yoongi isn't exactly a fan of being called out in front of everyone and so he turns his unimpressed look on full throttle as he drags his eyes up to meet Minji.“What the f*ck do you want?” he asks.

“You're an asshole.” Minji calls to him across the kitchen and Yoongi almost rolls his eyes back into his brain. The entire kitchen looks between the two of them like they're the most annoying and confusing people in the world and Yoongi has to agree.

“Yeah, thanks, noted.” Yoongi says, turning back to his grill.

. . .

As time goes on, Yoongi finds even more things to dislike Minji for. For one, she wears high heels to make herself taller than Yoongi, just so that she can leer over him while she speaks and that's just cheating. For another, she wears this bright red coloured lipstick that makes her look liked she has just sucked all the blood out of someone and Yoongi keeps mistaking her for a literal vampire. Thirdly, her insults are terrible; she is clearly an amateur. Luckily for Minji, Yoongi finds within himself the initiative to teach her how to insult people better by insulting her every chance he gets.

“Pigtails again, Minnie?” he asks Minji as she walks by him with her head held high, “What are you like six years old?” It's petty and not a particularly genuine insult but it gets the job done as Minji's eyes snap to look at him.

“Nice personality what are you like, eighty?” She responds.

“Yeah. Maybe you should respect your elders.” Yoongi replies. “Shouldn't you be in kindergarten class or playing tag with your little friends?”

“I generally don't respect assholes.” Minji responds, “Shouldn't you be retired?”

“Counting down the days.”

“Anyway I can make the process faster?”

“I already age ten years every time I talk to you.”

“I wish it were twenty.”

“It's getting there.”

Both Yoongi and Minji feel compelled to say the last words so their arguments get pettier, longer, and more drawn out over time. When Yoongi dyes his hair pink and Minji says he looks like a raw salmon,Yoongi replies by saying that Minji looks like a salmon in general and that escalates to a five minute argument about the fishing industry. By the end of it Yoongi is making up bullsh*t he only vaguely recalls that he may have read online just so that it sounds like he knows what he is talking about better than Minji.

They're famous to the rest of the staff as two people you want to keep away from each other at all times because eventually someone's going to start something. More than once their coworkers have had to step in to break up fights. Yoongi thinks that they have fought over everything under the sun. Minji had called Yoongi's shoes ugly and that argument had ended in them fighting over whether vans or converse were better in general. At this point they have fought over politics, the environment, philosophy, literature, and so much more.

For some reason, just seeing Minji makes Yoongi's blood boil and he has a hard time letting go of that. Minji has definitely managed to get under his skin, in a way that was infuriating and Yoongi wakes up every day hoping that Minji has gotten fired that morning.

Chapter 2: Enemies to... Nemisises

Chapter Text

“Yoongi what the f*ck is your problem?!” comes a shrill voice from the other side of the kitchen. Yoongi turns his head to see Minji angrily stomping towards him. She looks absolutely devastated, hands trembling as she holds her apron in her hands, eyes wet but not overflowing. Her jaw is clenched and her eyebrows are furrowed and she's looking at Yoongi with the kind of coldness in her eyes that should be reserved for saving the ice caps from global warming.

Yoongi opens his mouth to babble something incoherent about not knowing what the f*ck Minji is on about but she interrupts him, “Did you put peanut butter in the glaze on the pork for table twelve?!” she whisper-yells, apparently at least having enough professionalism as to not let the entire restaurant hear them, but not enough to not cause a scene. Yoongi becomes distinctly aware of the fact that everyone else in the kitchen is staring at him. Minji doesn't seem too perturbed by it. “Are you trying to kill someone?!” She accuses.

Yoongi blanches. “I, uh.”

“Or are you just trying to get me fired. Jesus Christ a man is going to the hospital. He couldn't breathe.” her voice cracks, “Oh my god I'm going to get fired.” Minji’s hands clench around apron as she stares down at them; shoulders shaking and breath heaving.

“Minji, calm down,” Yoongi says unhelpfully, looking at the distraught girl in front of him “what the hell happened?”

“I served a man peanuts who is allergic to nuts is what happened. I heard his wife yelling for someone to call a doctor and I run back to find he has his hands to his throat, his skin white as a ghost, and his wife is trying to get him to hold still as she aims a needle at him. I tried to help and then the owner’s son was there and he told me to go back to the kitchen while he did some damage control.” Minji exhales shakily, “I told you explicitly on the note that the customer could have no peanuts.”

Yoongi has flashbacks to reading a note that read 'NO PEANUTS' in bold lettering, that had only been underlined around one hundred times. He had assumed that meant leave out the peanut bit garnish that he normally sprinkled over top. The dish was called 'pork tenderloin in peanut sauce’ and the sauce’s main ingredient was peanut butter. It never struck him that someone allergic to peanuts would order that. In hindsight he definitely should have asked for clarification, but at the time it had never even occurred to him.

“Oh.” Yoongi says eloquently. “Oh my god.”

“That's all you have to say?” Minji asks suspiciously, “A man almost died.”

“I'm – uh, sorry?” Yoongi tells Minji while his mind reels. In all his three years here he had never sent anyone to the hospital before. “I don't know what you want me to say. I f*cked up. I feel terrible.”

“Yeah, and you might have just managed to get me fired, so good for you I guess.”

Yoongi studies Minji in disbelief, “You think I would do something like this on purpose?”

“f*ck. I don't know.” Minji says tipping her head back and letting her bunched up apron fall out of her hands “I wouldn't put it past you.”

Yoongi blinks. “Are you serious?!”

“Prove me wrong.”

“You think I would put a man's life in danger just because I don't like you?”

“I don't know Yoongi. Maybe not. Or maybe you didn't think your little plan to get me fired through. Maybe you figured he wouldn't actually die. I don't know. All I said is that I wouldn't put it past you.”

“Are you f*cking kidding me?” Yoongi starts and Minji interrupts him.

“I’m not kidding, Yoongi. I see though you. I know you. You may have this entire kitchen believing your stupid f*cking act that you're a little rough around the edges but fundamentally a sweet kid, but not me.”

“Right of course. You're the only person here that sees for what I truly am: a cold blooded murderer. Would you calm down for one second and think about what you're saying?"

“That's not what I said. Look. Maybe you didn't screw up on purpose. Maybe I made the mistake of accusing you of trying to get me fired. I can admit that. I'm still freaking out about what just happened. But that doesn't change who you are, Yoongi. You're so preoccupied with yourself that you forget everyone around you. You have this disguise built up around you that makes it seem like you almost care, but it's only so you can convince yourself that you're an okay person. I wouldn't put any heartless action past you.”

Apparently Minji was all hands on deck going straight for Yoongi's throat, and to think just a minute ago he had been peacefully just doing his job. “Going right from bizarre accusations of murder to just outright insulting me, are we?” Yoongi stage whispers, sparing a brief glace to the stopped kitchen around him. “All this is so rich coming from you. I don't give a sh*t about how I look to others or myself, okay? I know I'm an asshole. I don't like being accused of it on a daily basis, but I know. You, on the other hand, seem to think you're some sort of saint because you buy your coworkers coffee cups and greet everyone with a smile. Why don't you take your sweet little act, your sickly fake smiles and your pretty little skirts and shove them right up you-”

Minji's glare doesn't cool. Her jaw tightens, “I am so close to punching you in your face.” she hisses.

“If it gets you fired, I'm willing to donate my face to the cause” Yoongi tells her bitterly.

“God.” Minji's still wet eyes flicker up to look at the ceiling as she tips her head back and sticks out her jaw. She breathes out. “I hate you so much.”

Yoongi studies the girl in front of him. “Feelings mutual.” he states.

Minji looks back at him, “No.” she says, “I legitimately don't understand how anyone can stand you.”

Yoongi co*cks his head to the side, “Again,” he says, “the feeling is-”

Minji cuts him off, “No, it's not. The people in this kitchen like me. I'm nice. It's pretty easy to understand. The only reason you don't like me is because I'm specifically not nice to you. You on the other hand; there's no reason to like you. You're not nice; you're not special; you're not cute. You lash out, and you don't even think about the consequences.”

“What did you know me in another life?” Yoongi asks incredulously “Where are you getting your information from?”

Minji stares at Yoongi coldly. “Yeah." she says, "well maybe I did Yoongi, and maybe that's why I know how much of a f*cking asshole you are even though no one else seems to notice.”

“The f*ck does that mean? You've got to be f*cking kidding me, are you serious?” Yoongi asks and Minji levels him with a glare. “Okay, not only are you a f*cking piece of sh*t, but you're also f*cking delusional. I don't even know why you hate me. First you wouldn’t tell me why you hated me and now you're actually trying to tell me that you knew me in another life? Am I supposed to take you seriously? Leave me the f*ck alone.”

“Oh I've told you why I hate you but apparently knowing you're an asshole changes nothing for you. I shouldn't be surprised.” Minji raises an eyebrow. “Peel back one layer of you basically ignoring people and you get bloodthirsty. When things go south you start throwing insults to get everyone on your level. You're vindictive and you hurt people and you don't even try to f*cking stop yourself. All your friends are scared of you and if they aren't they should be. You're a f*cking parasite Min Yoongi. ”

Yoongi's face screws up, “You don't even know me!” He exclaims.

“Oh, I think I know you better than anyone else here." Minji levels Yoongi with a meaningful glare. "You are poison, Min Yoongi. Your very existence threatens the wellbeing of everyone around you. You're a parasite."

Yoongi is quiet for a second. He looks at the floor. It shouldn't hurt to be called a parasite by someone he has only known six months. It should not mean much to be insulted by someone who has literally just been insulting you from the day they first met you. It's a pretty generic insult, a low blow, and at this point Yoongi should be immune to it. But for some reason Yoongi's throat aches and his head is swimming and he just hates it. He hates where he is right now, he hates being here with Minji, he hates fighting with her, and he hates how she makes him feel. Minji's words have already made their home inside Yoongi's chest, weighing his heart down until it feels like a brick in his chest.

It's a bizarre experience to be hated to vehemently so arbitrarily. It feels like there's something off about his very core, like Minji sees in him something no one else does. When Minji tosses aside the meandering and tells Yoongi exactly how she feels about him, it hurts way more than it logically should. He hates it. He hates Minji.

“What the f*ck is wrong with you?” Yoongi whispers.

Yoongi doesn't look up but he hears Minji say “God.” her voice is hoarse. Yoongi tips his head up to see Minji press her palms into her eyes as she leans over slightly. “I hate you so f*cking much.” her voice cracks. “I feel bad. I really do. I don't like who I am right now. This isn't me. I should go and cool off for a bit but Jesus-” She removes her hands from her eyes to look at Yoongi imploringly, “I just hate you so much.” The weight in Yoongi's chest grows, “Like, do you even feel bad for anything that you've said? To me? At all? I feel bad. I feel terrible every day. I mean I hate you, but I still feel bad.” she sighs frustrated. “But you don't feel bad, do you? I just- I don't understand-” she pauses, “Christ I hate you so much.”

“f*ck you.” Yoongi manages to spit with all the venom he has left. Yoongi has two options. 1.) Prove Minji's assessment of him wrong by dropping the argument and letting everything that had happened between them go, and not allowing Minji the satisfaction of calling him vindictive and getting away with it. 2.) Use Minji's petty jab at him as an invitation to cut deeper.

Yoongi's tongue, which works quicker than his brain, decides for him. “Seriously, f*ck you,” he begins, “You think you're so f*cking perfect-”

He's cut off by a loud authoritative voice carrying across the kitchen, “Just what the hell is going on in here?” Yoongi looks up from glaring at Minji to see that the owner's son himself, Kim Junmyeon, had come into the kitchen and is marching up to them with a very dark look on his face. f*ck. “I am this close to firing both of you on the spot. You have only thirty seconds starting now to explain this bullsh*t.”

Over the three years that Yoongi has spent working at this restaurant Junmyeon has been a reliable constant. To new staff, Junmyeon comes off as intimidating. Very work oriented. He remains intimidating until he starts it with the dad jokes, and then the dad jokes never stop and Junmyeon becomes everybody's favourite lame boss dork. Well, on the good days. On the bad days he is a very stressed, overworked, and disappointed boss that makes everyone feel individually at fault for the shambling ruins of the restaurants fiances. He's giving them that look now and Yoongi feels like his soul is shriveling up.

Junmyeon is a sweetheart and Yoongi has been around him long enough to know that he hates firing people. He proven himself to be an incredible businessman and leader. His only flaw is that he builds up functional relationships and repertoires with all his employees and then gives way too many second chances.

“Yoongi.” Junmyeon says, narrowing his focus to Yoongi

Under the blistering gaze of the kindest boss in the world, having his job threatened by Junmyeon himself is enough to get Yoongi to swallow the quell of excuses in his throat and shut the hell up.

Junmyeon eyes Yoongi as Yoongi tries valiantly to keep eye contact with Junmyeon before Junmyeon eyes flicker to Minji. “Minji?” he says, “Any last words?”

“Yoongi is an asshole.” Minji supplies helpfully.

“Okay, that's true,” Junmyeon agrees, “but also I feel like you overuse that term.”

Yoongi looks between the two of them appalled, “It's not true!”

“Shut up, asshole.” Junmyeon tells Yoongi, and Yoongi is pretty sure that Junmyeon is at least half kidding but the atmosphere doesn’t lighten a single watt. “I am so close to firing both of you. Just what the hell is going on?! Can either of you explain why I come on here after dealing with an almost fatal nut allergy to find you two screaming at each other?”

Minji takes a deep breath and keeps her eyes on the floor at Junmyeon's feet. “I uh,” she says, “thought Yoongi had purposefully messed up one of my orders.”

Junmyeon frowns, “And you thought that the best way to handle that was to disrupt the kitchen to yell at a co-worker. You do know what an Expediter is for, don't you? Complaints are supposed to go through her, to prevent this exact problem.”

Minji doesn’t look up from the ground. “Yes, sir, it was stupid and I acted rashly, and I let my temper get the best of me”

A muscle in Junmyeon’s jaw twitches, “You caused a scene, disrupted the staff and disrespected your co-worker. Not to mention this is not the first incident I've heard of from you two. I've lost track of how many complaints I've gotten over the past couple of months, are you not capable of keeping it professional for five seconds?”

“Yes sir, I recognize that I messed up and if you have to fire me I understand.” She lifts her head to look Junmyeon in the eye, “I just want to say that I'm very sorry, sir. I know what I did wrong and I ended up inconveniencing you as well as disrupting the kitchen. I'm sorry.”

Junmyeon sighs and rubs his brow, “Shut up, Minji.” he says, “Yoongi do you have anything to say at all about this incident.”

Yoongi swallows his survival instinct, “No.” he says.

Junmyeon studies Yoongi, fingers still pinching his brow, “Okay,” he says, “Because if you don't say anything I will not hesitate to fire you, which to be perfectly honest is not something I want to do. You've worked here for three years, Yoongi; I know you're better than this. You've never let me down before, but you have to give me your perspective or an explanation or I can't help you.” Yoongi can't think of anything to say and instead looks Junmyeon in the eye as he says nothing. Junmyeon sighs, “At least give me some assurance that this won't happen again.”

“It won't happen again.” Yoongi says quietly.

Junmyeon looks at him tiredly, “Okay,” he says, “Why not?”

“I won't let it.” Yoongi tells him determinately. No way was he going to let his feud with Minji threaten his job again.

Junmyeon presses his lips together, “That's not good enough.” he says.

Yoongi wets his lips, “Well, what do you want me to say?” he asks.

Junmyeon sighs again, “I don't know, Yoongi. That this stupid rivalry you have going on with our new, perfectly competent, waitress Minji is going to stop?”

Yoongi's eyes flicker away from the strong eye contact he was making with Junmyeon, “I can't promise that.” he says. The whole feud thing wasn’t exactly in his control. He's pretty damn sure Minji hates him more than he hates her.

Junmyeon's eyes don't leave Yoongi, “Then you know I have to fire you.” he says calmly and Yoongi swallows nodding, and looks back up at Junmyeon steadily, accepting his fate. He doesn't know where he's supposed to get a job this good somewhere else, he's become so accustomed to the menu and the staff. His bosses had always been incrediblely reasonable and he'd accumulated like three raises. Losing a job is sh*tty. Yoongi feels sh*tty.

Junmyeon glances away from Yoongi to look at Minji. She has her eyes downcast and is still playing with her skirt. Junmyeon says, “I don't want to lose you either, Minji. In the few months you've worked here you've really proven yourself. What can I say, everyone loves you.” he laughs, “Seriously everyone tells me what a delight you are to work with. You're hard working, willing to put in extra effort, and kind as hell. Don't think just because you haven't worked here long that I haven't noticed. I am seriously shocked that you have such a problem with Yoongi here. This kind of antagonism cannot happen in a work environment. I expected better from both of you.”

“I understand, sir. I'm very sorry.” Minji says.

“You don't have to call me sir.” Junmyeon tells her tiredly, “I just don't know what to do with you two."

“It really won't happen again.” Minji tells him.

Junmyeon shakes his head, “And how can I be sure of that?” he says, “Because you two have been an issue here for months now. Look. I can give you another chance but not for free. I'm putting you two on closing and prep together every weekend until you work your sh*t out.

Yoongi blinks stupidly at Junmyeon and Minji lets out a quiet gasp. “That's really generous, sir.” She says.

“Just don't f*ck it up.” Junmyeon warns her, eyes flickering between Yoongi and Minji. “I really am being way too generous. My father doesn't hear about this, got it? Or you really will be fired. You're lucky I really like you two.”

Minji’s eyes are wide, “Thank you so much, sir,” she says “you won’t regret it.”

“Please stop calling me sir.”

“Sorry, Mr. Kim.”

“Just call me Junmyeon.”

“Okay sir, Junmyeon.”

“Whatever. Just get back to work.” Junmyeon gives a tired hand wave and Minji nods quietly to herself and leaves the kitchen without looking back. Junmyeon then glances at Yoongi and gives him a curt nod before following Minji. Yoongi spares a glance at the rest of the kitchen staff and finds that no one is looking at him except Jungkook who is still idling near the entrance. Yoongi gives him a shrug with emphatically wide eyes and turns back to his food to find it entirely crisp and burnt from having just been left on the stove, he sighs and throws it out.

. . .

Yoongi lies awake staring at the ceiling willing the sick feeling in his stomach to go away. The white ceiling is a dusty grey in the dull light of the moon, and the fabric of the armchair is rough against the bare skin on his neck. The television is still on and emitting a dull buzzing noise. Getting your job threatened because you f*cked up big time and let some irrelevant person get that deep under your skin is not something Yoongi could just sleep off. Neither was being the recipient of such blatant and profound hatred.

Minji probably didn't know it but she had hit a few of his weak points.

Yoongi would never deny being an asshole. That's the one thing that Minji never seemed to be able to understand. It's not something he's proud of being, but it's also not something he would negate. It’s not like Yoongi doesn't try not to be, and it's not that he wants to be. He just knows what he is; garbage; useless garbage that benefits no one and instead just wastes space and time. He knows. Minji had somehow managed to hit it right on the head, exactly what Yoongi was. A parasite. A toxin. It's not something anyone had ever out loud admitted to Yoongi, and weird to have it come out of the lips of his sworn enemy.

How did Minji know? What did Minji know about him? How had she been able to tell Yoongi's composite self so immediately before even meeting him? Had she sensed it? She was literally the sweetest person to everyone else, what was it about Yoongi that offended her so much? Was he really so terrible?

Yoongi blinks at the ceiling, stomach churning as he bites at his bottom lip. Somewhere off to his left he hears Hoseok’s sleeping form heave deeply. Did Hoseok think the same of him as Minji did? Yoongi has never really done anything to deserve Hoseok. All Yoongi is is depleted energy and bad jokes. He leaches energy off Hoseok, clinging to him like a barnacle... or a parasite. He doesn't even have anything to give back. What does Hoseok gain from their friendship? A grouch? A mood-killer? And what does he lose from their relationship? Time? Energy? Other friends he could be spending time with instead? Maybe Hoseok just stayed around because Yoongi was too needy, because he felt bad. Yoongi thinks he should feel worse for the fact that it makes him glad that Hoseok sticks around. Even if Yoongi is like poison to him.

Hoseok sighs in his sleep, and the couch squeaks as he shifts. Yoongi bites back a very sleep deprived random apology for existing that certainly wouldn't help anyone as he turns to glance at Hoseok. He finds Hoseok's eyes are open. Hoseok frowns, hair mussed up and looking miserable, “I can hear the gears churning in your brain from over here.” he says “Why the hell aren't you asleep?”

Yoongi rolls his bottom lip under his teeth, “Just thinking,” He says, “It's nothing.”

“If it was nothing then your entire being would not be screaming at me right now that something is up. So spill. I only have so much awakeness left in me.”

Yoongi doesn't smile, “It's just-” he says, “Do you think I'm a parasite?”

Hoseok blinks sleepily, his head still tilted sideways and resting on the couch cushion. “What.” he says tiredly.

“Do you think I'm a parasite?” Yoongi repeats.

Hoseok groans “I swear I'm going to kill Jimin.” he says.

Yoongi squints. “Jimin?” he asks.

Hoseok makes a sleepy noise and rubs at his eye with the back of his hand. “Sorry, I meant Minji.”

“Oh.” Yoongi says softly, “having trouble keeping my enemies apart?” Yoongi wonders how it came to be that he had two enemies, he's pretty sure most people didn’t even have one, what was so repulsive about him?

“No, I'm just tired.” Hoseok yawns.

“Oh,” Yoongi says, “Because they’re pretty easy to tell apart. One of them is literally the spawn of Satan and the other one is- well, she's Minji.”

Hoseok blinks sleepily at Yoongi. “You hate Jimin more than Minji?”

Yoongi blinks back, “Are you surprised?”

Hoseok yawns. “I guess I shouldn't be.”

“Minji is,” Yoongi pauses, “harmless. She's stupid but she's harmless. Jimin on the other hand, can suck my dick.”

Hoseok sighs and shifts his sideways position on the couch, “What the hell happened between you two?” he asks.

“None of your business.” Yoongi says petulantly.

“It's been years.”

“Guess you'll never know. Not unless you want me to ruin Jimin for you.”

“What does that mean?”

“Nothing. Forget it. Pretend I didn't say anything. I'm sure Jimin is a great friend to you-”

“Come on, Yoongi, don't be like this.”

“-Maybe things spiraled out of control,” Yoongi lies. “I guess we're both at fault.” They were both certainly not at fault.

“Yoongi-”

“Let it go Hoseok.” Yoongi says tiredly, “I've moved on. So should you.”

“If it's just that things spiraled out of control why can't you make up with him?” Hoseok asks.

“I said I didn't want to talk about it.” Yoongi says, “Just believe me that there are things you don't know and that I would rather shove my hand in a blender than make up with Jimin.”

They're quiet for a while until Hoseok speaks, “You're not a parasite Yoongi, I like having you around and I wouldn't be friends with you if you were a parasite anyway you dummy.”

“Oh.” Yoongi says dumbly.

“Tell me about what's bothering you.”

“It's not bothering me.” Yoongi says childishly even though he feels very bothered.

Hoseok sighs, “Do you think you're fooling anyone? I told you I only have so much awakeness left in me.

Yoongi huffs in annoyance, “I don’t know man. Minji said some things and they kinda hit home, and now I'm wondering if I'm really as much of an asshole as she thinks I am.”

“Okay that's easy, you're not.” Hoseok says immediately.

“Pretty sure I am.”

Hoseok sighs again. “You can be.” he says helpfully, “Like for instance right now you're keeping me awake by being angsty. But almost anyone can be. Anyone except me.” he yawns.

“You're not helping.”

“I'm tired.” Hoseok explains sleepily. He grunts then shifts. “Listen. Yoongi. You're not an asshole, no more than anyone else. You can be grumpy, but you're sweet and you think too much. If you're so sad about being an asshole then maybe make it your mission to prove Minji wrong.

“But what if she's right?”

“She's not. Who knows you better, Minji or me?”

“I don't know.”

After a moment of fumbling Hoseok throws a pillow at him. “It's me, you asshole.” he says. Yoongi snickers and holds it close to him, playing with the corners. Hoseok yawns again. “Anyone that knows you decently well knows that you’re not an asshole, okay? You’re great. Go to sleep.”

. . .

Yoongi is leaning on the mop watching Minji blatantly ignore him as she scrubs away at the counter top, headphones in her ears, and Yoongi wonders, not for the first time, what it was that had made her hate him so much in the first place. Apparently now she thinks that Yoongi is a vindictive asshole and a “parasite” but what had made her think that in the first place? It couldn't just be some intrinsic knowledge or oversight. That's stupid. And it couldn't be because she knew him in another life. That's also stupid. Was that the impression he gave her? Had he done something to Minji that he hadn't realized he was doing?

Yoongi realizes that the more he thinks about Minji the more questions come up and it occurs to him that he actually does not know the first thing about her. What is Minji's favourite song? What unquestioningly would always make Minji happy? What did she look like when she was excited? What did she do when she was sad? Had Yoongi ever made her sad? Yoongi thinks he used to believe he knew everything he needed to know about Minji in order to hate her guts, but the more he thinks about it, the more he understands that he hadn't hated a person, but a caricature.

Real people are notbottles of anger ready to explode, and real people do not live their lives for the express purpose of annoying Yoongi, and real people have real reasons for thinking the things that they do, even if they arewrong. Yoongi is watching a real person, purposefully avoiding the closet with the cleaning supplies even when she clearly needs new water just to avoid Yoongi, and Yoongi doesn't have the slightest clue why. He doesn't know why or when Minji started to hate him but it must have been early on, in the first impressions stage where she must have somehow arbitrarily decided that Yoongi was a garbage person with a horrible personality, but Yoongi thinks the best thing he can do now, after months of cold shoulders and thinly veiled contempt, isto prove her wrong.

So Yoongi goes into the cleaning closet himself and prepares a new bucket of water for Minji, not as proof of anything, but just a symbol of a truce. He puts the clean bucket right beside the dirty one and Minji determinedly doesn't look at him as she scrubs away, ignoring his effort completely. He picks up the old bucket to dispose of the dirty water and while he's walking away he hears a familiar voice call out to him from behind, “Hey, don't pretend to be nice.” The voice says bitterly and Yoongi turns around to find Minji looking at him haughtily, holding one of her earphones out beside her ear.

“I'm not being nice, I'm being civil.” Yoongi replies easily and waits for Minji to respond.

Minji blows air out through her mouth and turns around to continue scrubbing at the counter, putting her headphone back in her ear. “Don't pretend to be civil either.” she mumbles.

Yoongi feels the corners of his mouth twitch upward, Minji obviously hates him, and she isn't above being petty just to end an argument, but she also wasn't a brick wall, and maybe one day Yoongi could get her to hate him just a little bit less.

. . .

Yoongi starts helping Minji, just in little ways, helping her carry ingredients, holding the water bucket up so that Minji can clean higher places, and always offering a helping hand if Minji looks at all overworked. For the most part Minji will ignore him, and will usually go out of her way just to avoid his help. But sometimes she will silently accept it without the obligatory glare of hatred, and her and Yoongi will just quietly work together side by side. It's not exactly pleasant but it isn't painful either and Yoongi thinks that Minji's company minus the insults is not so bad.

Eventually it becomes a sort of norm between the two of them, working silently together without speaking words. Yoongi is afraid that even coughing will provoke Minji into swearing him off again and break what little understanding they had so Yoongi avoids the matter completely by keeping his mouth shut at all times. Even asking for clarification or asking Minji to move is restricted in his mind. It's over a week of silent work before anyone says anything.

Minji is on the ladder cleaning the top shelf of the pantry with Yoongi standing below her holding the ladder steady when Minji takes a wrong step and wobbles precariously so that Yoongi instinctively puts out a hand on her waist to steady her. As soon as he realizes what he had done, as quickly as he had put his hand out he draws in back in cursing the gods and hoping he had not ruined everything.

“I asked you not to touch me.” Minji says.

“I'm sorry.” Yoongi says not daring to say anything else. They work in silence for the rest of the while that Minji is on the ladder. Yoongi contemplates life.

When Minji steps down from ladder Yoongi says, “We should talk.”

Minji doesn't look at him, “No thank you.” she says wiping her pants with her hands.

Yoongi tries again, “Minji I still don't know why you don't like me.”

Minji sighs and, after ignoring him for so long finally looks him in the eye, “Well that's just willful blindness isn't it.” She says. “I've told you why a million times: You're an asshole.”

Yoongi holds back a sigh, “Okay, but I don't know why you think I'm an asshole.”

“Because you're an asshole.” Minji retorts and Yoongi frowns at her. “I don't have to explain myself to you.

“You kind of do.” Yoongi responds.

Minji narrows her eyes, “I can just quit this job and then I never have to deal with you again.” she says.

“Don't be stupid.” Yoongi tells her.

“Ah, back again with the insults.” Minji says in an unamused tone.

“Damn it Minji,” Yoongi says affronted, “You villainize me for everything I say, what am I supposed to do?”

“Start with leaving me alone.” Minji replies simply.

“Believe me, I'd love to, but first we have to deal with this issue between us.” Yoongi says.

“I don't think we do.” Minji says.

“Yes, we do.” Yoongi responds immediately, “You think I'm an asshole right? A parasite?” Minji cringes at his words, Yoongi hopes that indicates guilt. “That's what started this whole thing yeah? Let's start with that.”

“I don't think we need to start at all.” Minji says.

Yoongi doesn't groan but he wants to, instead he pushes the conversation forward. “Okay, all cards on the table, yes I can be an asshole, maybe I am an asshole, I don't know, but I try not to be. I'm trying right now and it's hard and you're giving me nothing but I'm trying to be the better person here.”

“I'm sorry I make it so hard for you to be a good person.” Minji says and this time Yoongi actually does groan.

“Okay, you know what, forget it. Talking to you is like talking to a brick wall, forget I said anything; forget I even exist.”

“Gladly.”

Chapter 3: Progress is Tedious and You're Tedious

Chapter Text

“Jungkook help me, Minji's driving me up the wall and I'm dying.” Yoongi says, having left his station for a moment to do the very integral task of complaining to Jungkook. It's 3pm on a Tuesday which means that the restaurant has about three customers, a few stragglers, and Yoongi has to concentrate mostly on prep work for the upcoming dinner rush. It also means he can leave his grill unsupervised long enough to complain to Jungkook. Yoongi still has to hit his quota of five complaints a week or otherwise Jungkook would have to alert the authorities that Yoongi has been replaced by an alien. It's an agreement they'd made in elementary school.

Jungkook barely glances up from whatever contents of the pan Taehyung is frying, tipping his head only microscopically in Yoongi's direction. “That's your problem,” he says, “why are you coming to me?”

“Kookie.” Yoongi whines, “I'm being really nice I swear to god. Don't I deserve some recognition? Why does she hate me?”

Jungkook turns his head over his shoulder to blink obnoxiously at Yoongi, “Maybe she hates you because you leave food to burn while you go off and annoy people.”

Yoongi frowns and spares a glance at his grill, “I know what I'm doing.”

Jungkook looks at him skeptically, “Uh huh.” he says.

“Kook, please, at least give me some sympathy.” Yoongi pouts and Jungkook ignores him by instead trying to steal a pepper out of Taehyung's frying pan. Taehyung slaps his hand away. “Tae.” Yoongi begs, “My sweet sweet Tae. Please tell me that you feel sorry for me and lend me strength.”

“Go check on your food, dude.” Taehyung says, slapping Jungkook's intruding hand away again.

Yoongi mopes. “No one cares about me.”

“That's true.” Jungkook confirms. “Anyway are you coming out with us tonight?”

Yoongi is about to ask about what plans Jungkook is talking about because he'd never heard about them before but before he can Taehyung hums a noise of protest.“I don't think that's a good idea.” Taehyung says.

Jungkook turns his head, to Taehyung who continues work as if he hadn't said anything. “What, why not?” Jungkook asks

“I already invited Jimin.” Taehyung says boredly, shaking a pan.

Jungkook frowns, “I thought Jimin was busy.” he says.

Taehyung doesn't look up from the stove, “He was, but now he's not.”

“Oh.” Jungkook says dumbly, then he turns back to look at Yoongi apologetically. “I'm sorry, Yoongi.” Jungkook looks like he thinks he's f*cked up, fidgeting awkwardly with the buttons on his uniform. It's true that Yoongi doesn't like to hear about Jimin being invited to places instead of himself, but Yoongi feels more resigned than he feels slighted. Sometimes avoiding Jimin like the plague is a plague in itself.

“Maybe you'll come anyway?” Jungkook suggests. It's likely more to fill the silence than as a genuine offer. Of course, Jungkook could be really suggesting that Yoongi just forget about hating Jimin and have a good night out anyway. It would be stupid but Jungkook had never been on board with the whole hating Jimin thing, nor the eventual Jimin hating Yoongi thing that frankly Yoongi himself also wasn't on board with.

Yoongi doesn't bother pulling his reassuring smile out of the dusty archives of his expression bank. “I have to get back to work.” he says instead.

. . .

That night, instead of going out, Yoongi decides that a much better waste of his time is to change his hair colour to something less faded and terrible without the inch long roots he's sporting. He's got bleach and toner, and so he figures it's time to go blonde. Blondes have more fun right? Haha. What a hilarious and quality stereotype. He takes a hot shower and scrubs vigorously at his hair until it has becomes an slightly lighter faded pink colour. Terrible.

Yoongi ends up calling his ex-coworker Heeyeon to ask her to help him bleach his hair only to find out that she already had plans that night to go out with the group that Jungkook had invited Yoongi to. She offers to come over anyway, but Yoongi declines, secretly grumbling to himself. Twenty minutes later and with half the content of the bleach bottle already in his hair Heeyeon shows up, smiling in the doorway and Yoongi thinks he loves her. Which he does. Because she's Ahn f*cking Heeyeon; a living angel.

Heeyeon complains about what an uneven job Yoongi has done with his hair already and claims that it must have been an act of God that sent her over there to save it. Yoongi agrees. He complains to her about Jimin ruining all his nights out. She disagrees.

She asks him, “Would you even have gone?” because she knows Yoongi is half hermit and that he often doesn't go out when asked.

“That's not the point.” Yoongi says.

Heeyeon offers to take him out to get drunk with just her as a sort of consolation prize. As far as impromptu consolation prizes go, a night out with Heeyeon is about as good as it gets.

They go to a small bar. It's out of the way and unpopular, but successful enough to not be overly shady. It has alcohol and that's really what counts in the end. Yoongi orders a fancy sounding drink to splurge and Heeyeon disappoints him by just ordering a water. That's what he gets for going out for drinks with only a designated driver.

Yoongi gets about a third of the way through his glass in the hour they spend there, enjoying it mostly just as something he can do with his hands. Heeyeon tells Yoongi about how her new job is going, what it's like to work under Soekjin, and how she's doing. Yoongi tells her about his own work, manages to get in a few minutes of cathartic complaints about Minji whom Heeyeon has never met and can't disagree with him about, and consults with her on whether or not he should get a cat. She thinks he should.

Yoongi is in the middle of a very important thought about clawed verses declawed cats when a rowdy bunch of misfits herds through the doors and begins making a ruckus of disorderly youth clamor. Yoongi refuses to look up from the bar, turned towards Heeyeon and away from them, only vaguely aware of their general existence. He valiantly manages to ignore them for almost fifteen seconds before he realizes that he recognizes their voices and that they're addressing Heeyeon.

“Heeyeon?” Taehyung says and Yoongi resists turning around to look at him, hoping that Taehyung won't recognize him if he doesn't face him. He has newly blonde hair right? That has to count for something.

“Taehyung, oh my god.” Heeyeon says leaning back in her chair to look at Taehyung smiling.

“Heeyeon!” A Taeyeon's voice rings out, “I was so disappointed when I heard you weren't coming out, what are you doing here? Who's your friend?”

“My friend?” Heeyeon spares Yoongi a glance and Yoongi puts all his effort into communicating via eye contact that she shouldn't give away his identity and that they should leave immediately. “It's Yoongi.” she says brightly and Yoongi lets his head drop to the table with a thud.

“Yoongi?” that voice sounds a lot like Jungkook.

“Yeah?” Yoongi says, dragging his head up up the table to face the group of people crowded around the bar just a few feet away. He makes accidental eye contact with almost everyone there, excluding Jimin who he refuses to let his vision even hover near, and ends up settling his eyes upon Jungkook.

“Are you here because you wanted to come out tonight?” Jungkook asks, playing with the glass in his hands.

Yoongi still feels bitter to some degree overnot being asked to go outbecause it was assumed that he hated sunlight and peopleand so he replies, “No, I never go out unless forced to, you know that. I'm here to feast on the flesh of the living, like I do.” He passive aggressively directs the sentiment at Jimin, who while innocent in this particular scenario was still picked by his friends over him.

The group is quiet for a moment, eventually Hoseok says, “Nice hair, when did you dye it?”

“Oh thanks, I just did it today” Yoongi says. “It's supposed to give people the impression that I'm innocent before I steal their souls.” It's bitter; a bitter reference to the fact that Jimin hates him mutually with no good reason on his part. Yoongi is bitter, and petty, and altogether just emotionally exhausted from being in the same room as Jimin. It somehow hurts to have his friends still like Jimin, even though he had specifically acted to make sure his active dislike would change nothing. Or maybe Jimin just hurts.

He doesn't like knowing that Jimin doesn't like him. It feels unfair; unbalanced. Jimin should repent, really. Accept what he did was wrong, accept that Yoongi wanted nothing to do with him, accept that Yoongi hated him and move on. None of this mutual feelings of dislike bullsh*t. Had Yoongi screwed up? Maybe. Had it been justified? Absolutely. Jimin should be thankful that Yoongi didn't tell anyone what he had done. He should be indebted. Of course it's a lot easier to communicate this with sarcasm than it would be to tell Jimin this straight to his face. Yoongi doesn't have the emotional energy to rile himself up.

Jimin watches Yoongi, the ghost of a frown pulling at his face. “You look like a snowman.” he tells Yoongi and Yoongi is pretty certain that's supposed to be an insult. It's not particularity malicious but it still catches Yoongi off guard. It's unnecessary. And rude. Jimin had never been unnecessary and rude before. Jimin holds grudges, but generally passive aggressive ones. His default is laughing angrilly at misfortune.

Yoongi doesn't have the patience or energy to deal with Jimin or the conflicted and broken way Jimin makes him feel. He responds by dropping his gaze from Jimin. “Then it just suits my cold personality.” he meanders as he sips from his drink.

Heeyeon's eyes shift between Jimin and Yoongi warily and she tries to move the conversation forward valiantly, “So what are you guys doing here?” she addresses the general group, “I thought you would be at another bar.”

“Like The Red Room?” Jungkook asks, “It closed early.”

“Closed early?” Heeyeon asks.

“Yeah, well, the police showed up.” Jungkook replies.

“The police?” Heeyeon repeats shocked.

“I feel like there's a story here.” Yoongi says.

Yoongi has to spend another hour at the bar, which is painful because the entire time he wants to escape out of the 100 meter radius of Jimin. However at least he's never forced to engage with him, nor is it an impossible task to just pretend he isn't there.

Two separate groups have formed around either of them, with people wandering back and forth through the two vague clusters. Because Yoongi is the luckiest and most fortuitous person on earth, Heeyeon and Jungkook spend almost the entire time around him. The sweetness of their presence is like honey to bees, and Yoongi is pretty certain that he has them to thank for the simple fact that people even migrate to his position at all.

There's one bizarre point in the night where Yoongi's gaze catches on Jimin and something makes it stay. There's that twisting in his gut again, that he's come to associate with Jimin; a mixture of sadness and nostalgia. He misses Jimin, in that moment. Jimin used to make the days brighter, smile always gleaming and laughter always sitting on his tongue. He'd always been such a patient and understanding friend, someone Yoongi had thought he could never leave behind or else be at risk for losing a key component to what kept the sun warm.

Jimin looks different now: older, more mature. His ridiculous chubby cheeks had hollowed out and his jaw had become more defined. He still wears glasses, but the style had changed. The thinner frames rest easily on his defined cheeks and small nose. He looks good; he's aged well; Yoongi is almost happy for him.

But having a Jimin in his life is not worth the sacrifice of having Jimin in his life. Yoongi misses Jimin, but he also hates Jimin and so Jimin only gets a look and a moment of quiet contemplation from Yoongi after four years of blissful silence.

Jimin must notice him looking because Jimin turns his head in his direction and suddenly Yoongi is looking into Jimin's eyes from across the bar. Yoongi doesn't react visibly to it, but holds Jimin's gaze for a moment. Yoongi would be lying if he said it didn't make his chest ache and his throat hurt, and in that one moment Yoongi really allows himself to feel it. Yoongi thinks he can physically feel the rift between them. He thinks that the distance between them lies stringent between them, pulled tight like a rope that binds them together.Yoongi feels the rope that holds them together, pulled taut between them with the built up with tension over years of silence, and cuts it. In the way they both look at each other in that moment, it feels almost like their last goodbye. One last agreement.

And then Yoongi looks away.

Hoseok doesn't miss the small interaction between Yoongi and Jimin, he nudges Yoongi's side. “Talk to him.” he says.

Yoongi smiles sadly, “No.” he says looking down at his glass. Maybe Yoongi did miss the days when he'd had Jimin around, but, that doesn't mean that Yoongi forgives him, or ever would.

Yoongi breathes a sigh of relief when Heeyeon finally suggests that they go.

. . .

At work Minji continues to give Yoongi the silent treatment. As it turns out; apparently if she's not insulting Yoongi, talking to him is a waste of time. It is fine really; it makes sense. Yoongi doesn't get much joy out of his day by talking to Minji either, but it's still frustrating to know she still sticks to her guns and dislikes Yoongi.It could be a sort of stubbornness thing, or an instance of the slippery slope effect; cognitive dissonance can be a powerful motivator. Once people get to passionately believing a thing it's hard to change that belief. Even if it's stupid. Really f*cking stupid. Damn it Minji.

So he also goes out of his way to help Minji with menial tasks. It's not because he's that nice of a person, but it's because he gets a petty feeling of victory every time she looks at him when he does. This feeling is often accompanied by the smug thought, 'see? I'm nice.' which to be fair isn't true as long as he does he does it for the victorious feeling but it makes him feel great.

The good news is that while Minji still avoids him like the plague, when he does intercept her she doesn't cringe away or say outright rude things anymore. Yoongi thinks that's progress. Slow, agonizing progress, but still progress.

Yoongi himself has had more than one lapse of judgment where he does insult Minji when she does something particularly annoying, but Minji will only give him a look in response, never escalating the situation and Yoongi does take special care to make sure his insults never cut too deep. Every day the altercations become farther and fewer between.

It's raining today, coming down in sheets with the frigid callousness of an absent god. It's also late fall and it's freezing outside and Minji is sitting at one of the booths in her casual clothes, looking up from her phone and glancing out the window every few minutes. Yoongi doesn't usually see Minji outside her uniform and he notes that she hasn't dressed very fancy; she's got on dark ripped jeans and a black t-shirt, with a flannel shirt tied around her waist. Her bag is on the table in front of her. As he watches her pitiful figure observe the downpour he recalls that Minji usually walks home.

Yoongi slips into the seat across from Minji and she glances up at him briefly and then returns to her phone. Ignoring Yoongi was a thing Minji typically did these days, which, to her credit is better than insulting him.

“Hey,” Yoongi greets her, leaning slightly over the table.

Minji doesn't look up, “Hey,” she says.

“You walking home today?” Yoongi asks her.

“If I can't help it, yes.” Minji replies, still looking down. She glances out the window for a second, and then back at her phone.

“The rain just won't let up today, will it?” Yoongi says conversationally.

“No.” Minji replies simply.

Yoongi tries again, “Are you waiting for the rain to stop?”

Minji is quiet for a moment as she types something into her phone and Yoongi thinks he's used up all the patience Minji had for him for the day. He doesn't even think she will respond but eventually she does speak up, “No,” she pauses, “I'm waiting for Tae to text me about a ride home.”

“Tae-hyung or Tae-noona?” he asks, “Because Taeyeon is still working for the next few hours.”

“Taehyung.” Minji says disinterestedly

“Oh,” Yoongi says, running out of things to say, “How long have you been waiting?”

“A while.” Minji replies ambiguously.

“Oh well, if he hasn't replied to you yet, I can always give you a ride home.” Yoongi offers.

Minji finally turns away from her phone to look at Yoongi, or rather squint at him. “What?”

Yoongi shrugs, “Just in case you didn't want to walk home, I know we don't really get along but there's no reason I can't offer my very available car for your convenience, hell you can even sit in the back so that you don't have to look at me.”

Minji considers him for a moment and then sighs, turning to gaze out the window as the raindrops play their pattern across the glass. After a moment she speaks, still looking out the window. “Okay.” she says sighing like she wants Yoongi to know that this is almost as inconvenient for her as the freezing rain, before turning her eyes back to Yoongi. “That's better than freezing my ass off, I guess.”

Yoongi smiles a little at her hesitancy, “But just barely.” he says and he's surprised himself that there is no venom in it. “Come on, I'm parked just outside.”

Yoongi's car is nothing special, just a silver BMW that he'd bought used a year ago, it's not much but he had bought it with his own money that he'd saved up over the course of working at the restaurant and so Yoongi is proud of it anyway. Minji doesn't say anything about it, just stands around awkwardly getting drenched while Yoongi fumbles with his keys. Minji does end up sitting in the back, which Yoongi finds more amusing than insulting.

It isn't even a five minute drive to Minji's apartment building and Minji doesn't speak to him the entire way except to give Yoongi directions. Yoongi also never attempts to make conversations.

He idles just in front of the building to let Minji get out, looking in his rear view mirror and smiling at the distasteful face she makes at the weather outside. He thinks Minji is kind of cute. Not in a way that motivates him to want to be friends with her or get to know her at all. It's a unique to Minji kind of cute; a fond feeling kind of cute like 'Ah my old dumb enemy who arbitrarily chose to hate me but is actually kind of sweet when she's talking to anyone else' kind of cute.

Just before Minji steps out of the car she hovers in front of the open door for a moment, looking forward at the front of the car, but just lower than making eye contact with him in the mirror. “Thanks.” she says quietly, flicking her eyes up to meet Yoongi's just before she exits the car, shutting the door behind her, and then walking away without looking back. It's a small sentiment, Yoongi thinks, with small implications, and yet it still means something to Yoongi. Maybe him and Minji could never be friends,but he thinks he's still getting somewhere with her. It's enough to make him wonder what their relationship would have been like had Minji not decided to arbitrarily hate him.

He's watching Minji enter her apartment building without even a glance back in his direction, and Yoongi thinks that yes, Minji definitely did have her own unique form of cuteness.

. . .

It's not till clean up duty on a Tuesday night many weeks later when Yoongi realizes how far they had actually come. It's the little things that strike Yoongi all at once, things fundamentally meaningless in isolation but formed a picturewhen put all together.

For one, Minji is actually willingly in the same room with Yoongi, when she usually used to do cleaning jobs alone wherever Yoongi wasn't. Right now Yoongi is scrubbing the top of one of the stoves while Minji cleans the inside of an oven and Yoongi realizes that they'd been working amiably in silence for the past twenty minutes. For another thing, Minji wasn't even wearing headphones when normally she'd put up every available barrier to block out interaction with Yoongi. In fact if he recalls correctly she hadn't been wearing them for days now.

What had triggered Yoongi's sudden realization though was the fact that Minji had just asked him for help. It had only been a minor thing, she'd actually only asked Yoongi to get something for her, but it strikes Yoongi all the same. Here she is; casually spending time around Yoongi; asking him for help like it is the most natural thing in the world. Hell, Yoongi belatedly realizes that Minji had lowkey done small things to help him too.

It's a pleasant shift. He wonders whether Minji's conscious perception of him has actually changed or if she's just grown used to his company. He wonders if his conscious perceptions of Minji have changed. He thinks part of it is growing used to her but perhaps another part of it is growing to accept Minji; weird conviction to hating on random strangers and all.

Maybe friendship isn't about liking a person, not entirely. Maybe the first step is truly acceptance.

His musings are interrupted by Minji emerging from the oven to look at him blankly, “Yoongi?” she asks.

“Hm?” Yoongi responds automatically, returning to the waking world, “Oh yeah, detergent, sorry I'll get it now.”

Minji gives him a long, hard look, “You're so weird.” she says finally.

. . .

When Yoongi returns with detergent his brain is less clear of distracting thoughts than the oven is clear of grime. Him and Minji have a terrible history. One built on escalated first impressions and a long string of domino-like wrong doings. They'd both been pretty stupid, Yoongi can admit that. In retrospect he's pretty sure Minji isn't actually a terrible person. Probably.

He hands Minji the spray bottle and ends up standing by the oven and looking down at Minji contemplatively for a solid ten seconds before he finally decides to speak.

“Hey, Minji.” Yoongi says.

Minji replies from within the oven, voice echoing around it's chamber, “Yeah?”

“I'm kinda hungry and there's free food here to steal, do you want me to make you something?” Yoongi asks. He knows he's taking a plunge here, potentially ruining the quiet dynamic they had now. Oh well.

Minji's lower body which is sticking out of the oven stops moving, and the squicking sound of the cloth Minji was using over the metal of the oven subsides,“I'm sorry?”

Yoongi has to shake his head in exasperation with himself to plunder on this potentially self-sabotaging suggestion. “I know it's not technically allowed-” he says “but Taehyung used to do it during clean-up all the time, I don't think Mr. Kim really minds.”

Minji pulls herself out from the oven to squint at Yoongi, “You know I could use this as blackmail material right? You could get fired for stealing.”

Yoongi makes a move to put his hands in his pockets only belatedly realizing that his uniform didn't have any, “Don't be dramatic,” he tells her, “do you want food or not?”

Minji sighs. Yoongi doesn't know what he expects but he certainly doesn't expect Minji to agree, which is why he blanks for a moment when Minji says yes.

“Wait seriously?” Yoongi asks unbelieving.

“Don't look at me like that, I haven't eaten since morning.” Minji says pouting and not looking Yoongi in the eye, “Don't make me take it back.”

“You're going to love my cooking.” Yoongi promises her, grinning.

“I hate everything you do ever.” Minji gripes.

Yoongi smiles, “And I hate you too, but I still make a mean steak.”

“Everything you make is mean.” Minji interjects, and Yoongi may be hallucinating but he thinks he sees the ghost of a smile on her face.

. . .

They can't eat while working and so they end up sitting at one of the tables in the restaurant, one hidden from the view of the windows. Yoongi, feeling excessive, had made them both legitimate dishes from the restaurant, fancy garnishing and everything. Minji is staring at her food like it's a lot to take in and Yoongi wiggles his eyebrows at her from across the table.

“Pretty nice, huh?” Yoongi says, leaning over the table to admire her dish.

Minji glances up at him, “I'm trying to determine whether or not it's poisoned.” she replies.

“If it were that easy to determine then I wouldn't have bothered.” Yoongi tells her, “So you're just going to have to trust me.”

Minji sighs but starts poking at her food with her fork. She's not eating it yet but Yoongi decides not to push his luck on this dinner thing anymore and decides to focus on his own meal. They go back to their standard silence again, except now the restaurant feels hauntingly empty and the sounds of them chewing is starting to sound grating in Yoongi's ears. He had gotten Minji to sit down for a casual meal with him, he thinks, he should be able to make polite dinner conversation.

Yoongi finishes chewing the steak he had just put in his mouth, and covers his hand with his mouth as he swallows.“So,” he says eventually, “how do you like working here?”

Minji's hands slow as she cuts her own steak and she looks up at Yoongi. “Well, I've already worked here for almost half a year so it's nothing new.” she says slowly, succeeding at making Yoongi feel dumb, “But as far as jobs go, I think this place is nice.”

“Ah, good.” Yoongi says dumbly as he picks at his food, “There are lots of nice people here.”

“Yes, that's very true.” Minji replies.

“Like me!” Yoongi tells her cheerfully.

“Yeah, whatever you say.” Minji mumbles.

There's that same silence again, and Yoongi makes his second attempt at converstion, this time going for something a little more substantial. “So, why do you hate me?” he asks while Minji lifts her fork to her mouth.

The fork freezes in mid air as Minji looks to Yoongi.“Ugh”, she says putting her fork down, and turning away from her plate to look out to the dining room like she's planning her escape. “You hate me too, this is a mutual thing.” She reminds Yoongi, “Why do you hate me?”

Yoongi may be imagining the vulnerability he sees in her, so he just goes for the truth. “I hate you because we're declared enemies, but we're declared enemies because you hate me.” he says.

Minji eyes him,“Do you make enemies out of all the people that hate you?” she asks, “You must have a lot of enemies.”

Yoongi considers her for a moment, unsure of where the conversation he started is supposed to lead. “Actually I only have one other enemy,” he tells her “and he's my enemy because I hate him, not the other way around.”

Minji snorts, “I find that hard to believe.”

Yoongi smiles bitterly down at his plate “No, believe me, this guy is more of an asshole than I could ever be.”

He must have struck a chord with her because now Minji is looking at Yoongi with something like revulsion in her face. Maybe the idea of a person that was more of an asshole than Yoongi was like a whole other world of assholishness for Minji and Yoongi had to give her time to adapt.

Eventually Minji speaks, “I'm not sure that's possible.”

Yoongi feels his own chords struck. Jimin was absolutely more of an asshole than he was, even more than he ever could be. Jimin was petty and evil and Yoongi could do almost anything under the sun and it still wouldn't be as douchebaggish as Jimin. Perturbed, Yoongi begins to say, “Oh yeah? Do you think I would-” he breaks off. Yoongi had never told anyone what Jimin had done, it had been his problem; his secret.

It wasn't Yoongi's responsibility to hide from the world what a terrible person Jimin was, and yet he had taken it as his own duty, like it was a secret that only him and Jimin could know. Minji is looking at Yoongi with such disgust on her face that Yoongi feels absolutely compelled to tell her. Yoongi had never told anyone about the specifics of what had happened between himself and Jimin because all of his friends at the time had been Jimin's friends too. Yoongi hadn't been petty enough to try to end all those relationships on his conjecture, or brave enough to think his friends would take his side.

But Minji is a different story, it wouldn't take any amount of bravery to tell Minji from work about his ex friend Jimiin. Minji probably doesn't even know Jimin. In any case it couldn't hurt to ask.

“Do you know a guy named Park Jimin?” Yoongi asks Minji, pulling his glass to his lips and taking a sip of water.

“Jimin,” Minji repeats contemplatively, “Jimin, Jimin.” her eyes tip back into her head as she thinks, “No, I don't think so.” she says finally.

“Taehyung or Jungkook might have mentioned him.” Yoongi says.

“Hm?” Minji makes a thoughtful noise, “Oh yeah maybe. I can't be sure.”

Yoongi leans across the table conspiringly making Minji lean slightly back, “Well, I'll tell you a secret about him if you promise not to tell anyone else.”

Minji doesn't look very impressed or convinced. Her eyebrows are raised, her arms are crossed, and her chin is tipped slightly towards her chest as she looks over Yoongi impassively. “My lips are sealed.” she says boredly.

Yoongi begins his tale, “Okay well, you have to understand that Jimin and I started as friends...”

Chapter 4: The Inciting Incident for the Next 300 Years of Angst

Chapter Text

For the first time in maybe a month, Yoongi actually has plans to see Jimin. Just Jimin. He's standing in front of the door into Jimin's house waiting for Jimin to answer it and he hates the way he can feel his heartbeat speed up at the prospect, and the way that the early spring air makes him feel woozy and maybe a little bit in love. But he wasn't going to let that ruin his time with Jimin, not today. Today was Jimin day. A day for just Yoongi, Jimin, and music. A day of pretending that Jimin's girlfriend doesn't exist.

Yoongi wrings his hands in anticipation, he hadn't been able to calm the giddy feeling in his heart the entire trip over here. His brain is short-circuiting, just repeating the name “Jimin” to him over and over and it makes him even more excited. Being around Jimin after weeks of barely seeing him was an exciting prospect. And the promise of what this day holds remains an exciting prospect right up until Yoongi recognizes the person who answers the door. It's not Jimin.

It's not Jimin's parents or siblings either.

“Yunseo." Yoongi greets Jimin's girlfriend polietly. He belatedly realizes that he should have made Jimin come to his place after all.

"Yoongi." she says distastefully. “Jimin said you were coming.”

Yoongi does his best not to grit his teeth when he speaks, “Is Jimin here?” he asks politely.

His answer comes in the form of Jimin's voice, shouting his name over Yunseo's shoulder. Yoongi could see the brightness in his grin from a mile away.

"Yoongi!" Jimin greets, from behind Yunseo, moving up to put his arm around her waist. Yoongi tries tosuppresshis theatrical gag and ignore the way his heart jumps into his throat.

“Hey Jimin, I brought my laptop so that we could record some tracks today.” Yoongi would try to smile but he's afraid that if he did his face would crack in half. If he's honest with himself, Yoongi is angry, not just at Yunseo but at Jimin too, and maybe even a little at himself. Even when all Yoongi needed was Jimin's vocals to finish his passion project of three years, Yoongi and Jimin time took a backseat to Yunseo time. Of course. Yoongi has half a mind to slam the door in Jimin's face.

"Oh sh*t, Yoongi, I completely forgot that's what we were going to do today." Jimin says staring at the bag hanging down from Yoongi's shoulder.

In contrast to the bloody murder that Yoongi's head is screaming, Yoongi shrugs and says, "Ah, well it's no big deal."

"It seriously completely slipped my mind I have no idea what happened, Yoongi I'm so sorry." Jimin apologizes again, looking wide eyed at Yoongi.

Yoongi avoids Jimin's eyes and shrugs again, "It's okay." he says.

Jimin shifts awkwardly, removing his hand from Yunseo's waist to scratch at the back of his head. "We can reschedule it. I'm really so sorry. Do you still want to hang out?"

Yoongi is absolutely about to decline the offer, seeing as the last thing he ever wants to do is be around Jimin and his horrible terrible girlfriend but he catches Yunseo's eye and she glares at him. It's a bit bizzare actually. Yoongi is not the one intruding on plans here, and he's pretty certain that he has never done anything to wrong Yunseo. She should have no reason to object to his presence, but here she is, looking at Yoongi like she's daring him to come inside. Yoongi agrees with himself that Yunseo had actually conspired to crash the Yoongi-Jimin party for some nefarious purpose. She indeed had proven herself to be quite possesive.

It annoys Yoongi just enough to overcome his aversion to Yunseo and accept the invitation into Jimin's house.

“If it's not to uncomfortable to work with Yunseo here, we can still work on your music." Jimin says, looking worriedly down at Yoongi as Yoongi leans over to take off his shoes.

Yoongi really wants to decline because he wants to save that activity for when him and Jimin were actually alone, but maybe Yoongi-Jimin time didn't exist anymore and Yoongi shouldn't hold out hope for it to re-emerge again. Yoongi also doesn't want Yunseo to ever interfere with his and Jimin's friendship more than she already had. The ultimate symbol of not giving a sh*t about Yunseo would be to continue their plans as if she were not even there.

"No, that's not too uncomfortable." Yoongi tells Jimin. "Where do you wanna work?"

"My room should be good," Jimin replies smiling hesitantly, "You said you usually recorded voices in the closet right? For the noise reduction or something? What equipment did you bring?"

"Yeah, I was thinking the closet." Yoongi adjusts his bag on his shoulders, "And I brought my entire bag of goodies, should I set up in your room?"

“Yeah, of course, I'll help you.” Jimin says distractedly, before moving out of the entrance hallway to head to his room and Yunseo follows right after.

Yoongi's laptop barely lasts an hour on full battery power so there's a bit of shuffling around the house as he and Jimin look for an extension chord that will allow them to plug in the laptop from within the closet. They end up duct-taping the chord to the floor so that the closet doors and open and close over it easily.

Yunseo watches them idly, sitting on the bed, with her phone in her hands. Yoongi doesn't want her to help so he doesn't ask for it, but it also puts him on edge to have her there not doing anything. It's creepy. He sends a few glares and bad vibes her way but she'll only return them with equal venom. Weird, considering that she's the one intruding and not Yoongi himself.

Yoongi catches Jimin's arm as they scower the house for extra pillows to use as sound barriers."Hey, does your girlfriend hate me or something?" he whispers.

Jimin frowns and looks down to where Yoongi's hand is on his bicep, "Well she doesn't like you." he says carefully.

Yoongi screws up his face in annoyance, and drops Jimin's arm to cross his own arms, "And why the hell not?"

Jimin looks agitatedly around the hallway, "She doesn't like the way you keep telling me to break up with her for one." Jimin whispers.

There's a pang in Yoongi's chest. "You told her about that?" he asks unbelieving, "Jimin I didn't tell you to break up with your girlfriend just so you could gossip to her about it." Yoongi is hurt, and it's because Jimin wouldn't take him seriously, even when he wants to talk to privately talk to Jimin about making his own decisions Jimin still has to ask for approval from his girlfriend.

Jimin rubs at one of his shoulders defensively, looking at the wall over Yoongi's shoulder, "Of course I'm going to tell my girlfriend about what my friends say about her, especially if it's something as extreme as asking me to break up with her." He huffs.

Yoongi thinks that almost sounds reasonable considering the fact that it's bullsh*t. Yunseo has been upset enough over the most menial things in the past that now Jimin refuses to make any decision without consulting her first. Jimin isn't telling someone he trusts something important, he's trying to model how he's supposed to respond given her narrative, and Yunseo always has a way of twisting things to fit her narrative.

Yoongi knows that Yunseo is not good for Jimin. He'd seen his friend withdraw from theirfriend group; become more agitated and defensive; spend less time with them; assign lessimportance to their input on things. He'd also seen the way Jimin acted around Yunseo. Even though Yoongi avoided the two together like the plague, and they usually kept themselves pretty isolated, he'd still see them down hallways, or talk to them breifly. Jimin always seemed withdrawn and hesitant around Yunseo, less boisterous and more careful like he was always one step behind her. Like he was subservient.

Jimin had also sometimes complained to Yoongi about the little things that Yunseo did, when they were just messed up enough to get Jimin to notice. She had forgotten their four month aniversary and then after Jimin reminded her by surprising her with chocolates and dinner plans she had been angry with him for not doing more. On their six month aniversary Jimin had wanted to spend the day with all his friends at the one day carnival in town and Yunseo had been angry at him for even suggesting it. However on the day of, she had canceled their plans anyway because her ex-boyfriend was in town and she planned on spending the day at home with her friends avoiding him. Every time this happened Yoongi does his best to communicate that this is not healthy and it's not what happens in healthy relationships and Jimin always agrees with him and then shrugs it off.

"I love her." Jimin has told Yoongi many times. Yoongi doesn't think that's a good enough reason to stay with her. He tells Jimin this. Jimin agrees and then shrugs it off.

"When you love someone you accept their faults." Jimin says.

"Not if they're hurting you." Yoongi replies.

"They're not." Jimin insists. "She's not." Yoongi thinks she most certainly is.

Yoongi hates it. He hates the way Jimin becomes around Yunseo, he hates what was happening to Jimin right before his eyes. And he hates the way he can't do anything about it; he hates how helpless it makes him feel. He's looking Jimin in they eye, words failing him, trying to communicate how he's feeling right now to Jimin, trying to get through to him somehow. But there's no understanding in Jimin's eyes, no faith in him. Jimin had always been Yoongi's most understanding friend, with warmth and trust to spare but right now Jimin's eyes look cold and dark and Yoongi hates it.

When Yoongi struggles with the words and shifts to trying to telepathically communicate what he's thinking to Jimin, Jimin sighs and looks away from Yoongi at the wall behind him again. "Yunseo thinks that I should stop being friends with you too." Jimin says and Yoongi thinks he might cry. Because Yoongi gets it, he gets the parallel that Jimin is drawing here, he gets what Jimin is thinking and how everything makes sense to him, and he still thinks Jimin is wrong. And it hurts him that Jimin is comparing him to his girlfriend who is effectively isolating Jimin from his friends when he's trying to honestly communicate to Jimin all the worries he has about Jimin's one seven month long relationship. All Jimin sees is two individual peopleseparatelytrying tosabotageeach other's relationships that Jimin works so hard on to preserve, and Yoongi gets it, and hecan'tcommunicate any of this and he wants to scream.

He doesn't scream, instead he says, “I understand.” because he does, and then he drops the thread of the conversation. He thinks that maybe it's time to take evasive action. Perhaps getting Jimin to see the light through honestly communicating with him was the most honest approach, but also maybe the process was going to take a little more finesse. A little out of the box thinking.

That out of the box thinking comes in the form of confronting Jimin's girlfriend directly about her clingyness from within the confines of the literal box that is Jimin's closet.

Yoongi has just finished up showing Jimin the tracks that he had prepared, with suggestions of what he'd intended Jimin to do with his voice. He does his best to explain the program to Jimin becauseJimin appears to be absolutely enamored by everything Yoongi tells him. Jimin regularly points to different components on the display asking excited questions and Yoongi does his best to answer them.

Whenever Yoongi looks over at Jimin to gauge his understanding or look for his approval he sees Jimin grinning like he's made of stars and Yoongi's stomach starts doing somersaults. Jimin had always been excited about music and Yoongi feels like the luckiest person in the world to be the one with Jimin there beside him, engrossed by the tiniest details Yoongi explains to him. There's a warmth in Yoongi's chest that makes it kind of hard for Yoongi to breathe when Jimin gives Yoongi one of his most radiant smiles, and Yoongi feels like caramel melting into him.

There's only one thing that stops Yoongi from his complete transformation into a puddle of his own emotions, and it's the fact that Yunseo is there and she keeps looking at him. It's usually breif glances of disapproval when Yoongi laughs too loud or gets too visibly giddy . Jimin doesn't seem to take any note of it, happily looking at the display on Yoongi's laptop screen with his headphones on and his head bobbing up and down.

"Genuis producer Yoongi." Jimin comments smiling broadly after listening to the small changes Yoongi had made after one of Jimin's comments

Yoongi can't hide his own smile as he scratches the back of his head thoughfully, "I've still got a long way to go."

"You could seriously make a career out of this Yoongi," Jimin tells him sincerly, "I'm not kidding it's really good."

Yoongi laughs awkwardly and clicks around the files on his computer to open up the next track. "Maybe in another life." he says distractedly.

"Without a doubt." Jimin tell him confidently.

Yoongi makes a face as he looks over at Jimin and Jimin leans in close to pinch Yoongi's cheek, smiling brilliantly. Jimin is softness and warmth, light and air, as he radiates goodness and kindness. Jimin is never short on compliments that somehow manage to always sound genuine and thoughtful. Jimin's heart is made of pure gold, he could see goodness in anyone, and somehow he manages to be insecure over love. Jimin gets a lot of his self worth based onwhat he can be to other people, whether it be a friend, a shoulder to cry on, or in this case a boyfriend. Jimin genuinely likes doing things for other people. He likes loving other people.

There's no way Yunseo isn't manipulating him. There's no way she isn't demanding and aloof until Jimin reaches his breaking point, and then kind, soft, and honest in the quiet spaces. Most likelyscenariois that she doesn't realize she's manipulating him; neither of them do. The underlying honesty is probably what keeps the relationship going. Jimin, the loyal idiot, sticks with Yunseo because in those rare moments of kindness he feels like he sees her honestly for who she is and who she wants to be. And maybe it feels more honest because he feels like he's earned those moments by trying so hard on her. Maybe he sees merit in the way she scolds him, maybe he thinks she's the only person that is brutally honest to him. Maybe he sees the honesty and he runs with it, thinking that if he can make this relationship work then maybe he's actually worth something.

Yoongi gets it. He really does. And he Hates Yunseo.Jimin is just so willing to sacrifice himself and Yunseo thrives when he breaks his bones for her.

Yoongi hates every single thing about Yunseo. He hates her eyes, he hates her voice, but most of all he hates how expendable Jimin is to her. She doesn't notice when Jimin breaks his back for her, she doesn't notice when Jimin is hurt orvulnerableand is just looking for someone to love him as much as he loves them. Yunseo is not the type of person where you benefit from pouring love into. She comes to expect it ofJimin to pilot all the effort in their relationship. It's not healthy for Jimin. Yoongi hates Yunseo.

Jimin's face is close enough to Yoongi's to make Yoongi wonder what would happen if he just kissed Jimin, right there in front of his girlfriend. It would definitely be a stupid and would put way too much pressure on JImin. But maybe Jimin needs pressure. Maybe it would spark Jimin to think about the real differences between his relationships with Yoongi and Yunseo that weren't just the surface roles where Yoongi was a 'friend' and Yunseo was his 'girlfriend'. There's also a petty part of Yoongi that wants to know if Jimin would pick him over Yunseo.

Yoongi looks up to Yunseo to gauge her reaction and finds that she is ignoring him in favour of doing something on her phone. Yoongi has half a mind to kiss Jimin out of spite. He thinks that whether Yunseo is ignoring him or glaring at him, she still manages to be annoying.

When Yoongi and Jimin have finally finished their preliminary discussions and all ideas have been communicated, Yoongi is just irked enough by Yunseo's presence that he finally says something about it before him and Jimin are to shut the closet door and begin recording.

"Are you really going to just sit out there the whole time we record?" he asks Yunseo, not hiding his distain for her.

Yunseo boredly looks up from her phone, "Yes, is that a problem?" She asks, still thumbing at the touch screen.

"Yeah, it's kind of annoying actually, can't you go downstairs or go home or something. You're not even doing anything here." Yoongi tells her.

Jimin pokes Yoongi's side and gives Yoongi a warning look and Yunseo speaks up from the other end of the room. " I would leave but I don't trust you." she says distractedly, eyes not leaving her phone.

"What do you think I'm going to do?" Yoongi asks incredulously, "Murder Jimin?"

Yunseo rolls her eyes, "No, but I have a pretty good idea that you're going to try to convince him to break up with me." she tells him.

"That's because your relationship is f*cked up." Yoongi responds accusingly.

Yunseo scoffs and Jimin lightly hits Yoongi's side with the back of his hand, "Yoongi!" he whispers.

Yoongi takes that as an invitation to elaborate, "No, I'm serious, you're a f*cking sh*t girlfriend, you know that right? I kind of wonder whether you do it on purpose just to see how far you can push him."

"Yoongi, stop it. Please." Jimin says and Yunseo looks away from Yoongi, disinterestedly scrolling through her phone like she's edging Yoongi on. He oblidges.

"What the f*ck is wrong with you." Yoongi asks angrilly, "I really can't figure it out. It's like you think that just because Jimin is dating you his entire world should revolve around you. You act like you own him." Yunseo doesn't even look up from her phone. Yoongi hears his blood rushing in his ears. He about to continue but Jimin suddenly stands and roughly pulls Yoongi to his feet, pulling him by the arm as he storms out of the room.

Yoongi glares pointedly at Yunseo as he's dragged out of the room, word vommiting every single thing he thinks about her and just as he's turned around the corner Yunseo shouts after him, "You're a sh*tty friend, Yoongi." Right, Yeah. Of course. He's the bad guy.

Jimin pulls Yoongi all the way out the front door and onto the porch where Yunseo can't hear them. "Yoongi, what happened in there was not okay." he hisses. "You can't just start attacking Yunseo like that. She didn't even do anything wrong."

Yoongi's jaw tightens, "Yeah well, it happens." he says swallowing the quell of obscenities that lie on his tongue. There's an anger that lies heavy in his chest. An anger that was absolutelywarrantedtowards Yunseo but Jimin did not deserve the brunt force of.

"It happens." Jimin repeats in disbelief. "Are you kidding me? That's your excuse. It happens." Yoongi bites his tongue to stop himself from saying anything but god does he want to. "I just don't understand," Jimin says imploringly. "I just don't understand what went wrong. I thought things were going well. I thought you and Yunseo were getting along. I just don't understand why you did that."

Yoongi doesn't manage to bite back the daggers in his throat. "No, Jimin. You don't understand. You don't even try to. God this is such bullsh*t. You don't even try to listen to me until I become an inconvieince to you. Of course you don't understand why I did what I did. You have no f*cking clue because you don't give a sh*t about what I say anyway. You can't blame me for giving Yunseo something that was way overdue." Yoongi huffs out a breath. "No thanks to you." he says.

Jimin's stance falters as he shifts his footing. "That's not fair Yoongi." he says. "You can't tell me for months that my girlfriend is awful and then say it's my fault when you verbally attack her out of the blue like that because I never agreed with you. You don't get to do that. God, you act like everything you say is gospel. Can't I have my own opinion on my girlfriend?"

Yoongi physically feels his anger burn inside his chest like an anvil."Oh, I'm sorry." he says, "I forgot that I forbid you from having your own opinions. Yes you obviously do listen to me when I speak and don't put words in my mouth-"

Jimin interupts him, "That's not fair, Yoongi-"

"Life isn't fair. God. You think I wanted to interupt our music session for a petty jab at Yunseo. I didn't do it for me, Jimin. I would have been much happier had I just ignored the entire problem and kept on recording like I wasn't being a bystander to the f*cked up way your girlfriend treats you. I didn't want this. I don't want to fight you. I just want- God. I did it because I f*cking ca- f*ck."

Jimin takes an audible short intake of breath, jaw tight. "Yoongi I never asked you to defend my honour." he says. "I never asked for you to protect me. I wish you would stop treating Yunseo like she's the scum of the earth and started treating her like an actual person. She's a human being, Yoongi. Just like you, or me, or anyone else.

Yoongi presses his palms into his eye sockets in a vain attempt to reach into his skull and destroy his entire brain. "I never said she wasn't human." he says into his wrists. Of course Yunseo was human, but that didn't mean she was excused by wrongdoing just for the virtue of having flaws. Humans could absolutely be the scum of the earth. He lowers his hands. "God damn it do you hear yourself when you speak?" Yoongi asks incredulously. "'She's human' come on Jimin, give me a break. That's weak and you know it."

"It's the truth!" Jimin exclaims exasperated. "You treat Yunseo like she's some cartoon villian. Have you ever even spoken to her?"

"I don't need to." Yoongi says. He doesn't have to be able to write an essay on the intricacies of Yunseo's inner monologue and personality to know that what she does is reprehensible.

Jimin's jaw tightens and his eyes flicker away from Yoongi to hover up over the side of his head. "Yeah, okay. And I'm the unreasonale one that doesn't listen."

Yoongi lets his head tip back in exasperation. "Oh f*ck off." he says.

Jimin starts blinking furiously and refuses to look at Yoongi again. "Yoongi, can we please just go back inside and forget about all this." His voice cracks, "Just please will you apologize to Yunseo, just this once. If not for her then for me. Please give Yunseo a chance."

There is absolutely no way Yoongi can do that. Not when he had gotten this far. "I can't do that Jimin." he says.

"Well f*ck, Yoongi," Jimin's gaze hovers around Yoongi's ear instead of his face. "What am I supposed to do then?" his voice sounds hoarse and broken.

"You could break up with Yunseo." Yoongi provides stubbornly.

"I don't want to so that. I just want to make both relationships work, is that so impossible? Must you spend every waking minute with me complaining about my girlfriend and ridiculing the choices I've made with her? All of my friends tell me that they hate my girlfriend like I'm doing something wrong by staying with her, can I do nothing right Yoongi? Is trying to make my relationships work stupid?" Jimin is rambling, eyes wet and glistening, like he's looking for Yoongi to give him something to hold onto.

"Have you ever considered that maybe your friends hate her for a reason." Yoongi asks, more gently this time but still pissed.

"Every waking second, Yoongi, and I'm tired." Jimin tells Yoongi defeated, eyes flickering to the ground. "I wish you would stop acting like I'm doing something wrong just because I'm still trying. I just wish you all would give it a rest, maybe even for one day, just see it from my perspective. Everything that Yunseo ever does you take as evidense that she's evil. I can't even talk to you about her not taking the garbage out without you claiming that it's proof that she's doesn't care about anyone but herself and is obviously manipulating me."

Yoongi sighs trying to calm himself, "Okay," he says, "I understand, I really do but-"

Jimin interupts him "No you don't Yoongi, you say you understand all the time but really you're just trying to end the conversation so you can spring it up on me later."

Yoongi stills, "That's not-" he begins but Jimin interupts him.

"Yes it is." Jimin says. "That's exaclty what you do. Whenever you stop being able to defend yourself you tell me you understand and then you spring the exact same bullsh*t on me the very next opportunity you get."

Yoongi squints. "Is that really what you think?" he asks. Jimin avoids his eye, blinking repeatedly at the ground. "Jimin, the only reason I keep bringing the same things up is because you never listen to me. Nothing I ever say ever gets through to you, what the f*ck Jimin, the only person you listen to is your girlfriend and I have fours years of Jimin experience on her."

"It's not a f*cking competition Yoongi!" Jimin exclaims. "Is it my fault that you never say anything that makes sense? You keep blaming me for the fact that my friendships are falling apart. Can't you see how much that hurts me? Don't you see how much I'm trying Yoongi?"

"I'm not blaming you for anything and all your friendships are fine Jimin, Jesus Christ." Yoongi takes a deep breath to steady himself. "But you're not trying hard in the right ways, everyting you say is skewed to fit in the fact that your girlfriend is a nice person when she's clearly not."

"That's who I am Yoongi," Jimin's voice almost gives out. "I give people chances, evenyou."

The last statement hits Yoongi with unprecedented force, but he powers on. "This isn't a slight against your personality Jimin, I love you, I do. All of you. But that's not who she is, Jimin, some people you just have to let go."

"If you loved me then why do you keep pointing out to me everything that I'm doing wrong?" as lost and broken as Jimin sounds, Yoongi thinks he's finally getting through to him. After months of manipulation and being made to feel lik he somehow needed to prove his worth as a person through Yunseo's approval, maybe he finally began to get the idea. "Why do you keep pointing out to me that I'm failing at my friendships and my relationship at the same time." Jimin cries, rubbing at his eyes with the back of his hand.

Yoongi's heart aches at the sight, he thinks this conversation is harder for Jimin than it was for him and his instinct tells him to take everything back and comfort Jimin. But Yoongi thinks Jimin needs this, him and Jimin were finally talking and Yoongi couldn't just escape from it and try again later as he always did. "Jesus Christ Jimin, calm down, don't you see what she's doing to you?” Yoongi pleads, trying to get the point across to Jimin that he was trying to be tough for him.

Jimin sniffs pitifully, and looks at Yoongi's shoes.“The way I see it is that it's you who I'm crying in front of.”

Yoongi holds back the groan that threatens to escape after Jimin's words. Apparently he still wasn't getting the hint. Damn it. “Are you f*cking kidding me Park Jimin?”

Jimin snaps his eyes up from the ground to look Yoongi angrilly in the eye. “Do I sound like I'm kidding? As much as you hate my girlfriend, Yoongi, she's never made me cry.” Just as he says that, Jimin's voice cracks again and a new wave of tears start coming from his eyes. “f*ck.” Jimin curses, bringing the sleeves of his sweater up to his face to dab at his cheeks.

Of course Yoongi was getting blamed for Jimin's outburst of dejection. Of course this was Yoongi's fault and not the fault of his girlfriend that had been putting stress and pressure on him to be the perfect boyfriend in a way that interfered with all his other relationships. Of course Jimin was consistently going to blame Yoongi.

“Oh, f*ck you too.” Yoongi says. He knows that the way he's confronting the issue right now is the opposite of finessed, but maybe Jimin needed the emotional breakdown to finally get what Yoongi was saying. Yes the emotion was directed at Yoongi but Jimin wasn't stupid, he probably knows that he's looking for an escape and Yoongi doesn't have enough patience to let Jimin funnel his avoidance onto him. He needs Jimin to know he's angry. He needs Jimin to know that he had messed up, and he's hoping that maybe then Jimin will see that all the damage is reparable.

“Oh that's understanding of you.” Jimin says sarcastically.

“No seriously Jimin, f*ck you. You never care what I have to say. I'm going to go home to calm myself down because I don't want to cause any more damage here. Call me when you stop blaming me for everything.”

“Yeah whatever Yoongi, f*ck you right back. Do whatever you want, By the way I don't blame you for everything, but I guess it's all the same to you.” Jimin presses his lips together and looks at the floor. “Just remember that it's always you that leaves.”

“Goodbye Jimin.” Yoongi says, turning away from Jimin before he walks away.

Yoongi's mind is a whirlwind of anger and regret so much that he doesn't even register any part of his walk home. His steps are automatic and his body on autopilot. It's not until Yoongi reaches his front door step, twenty minutes later, that Yoongi realizes he'd left his laptop at Jimin's house.

. . .

Jimin doesn't return Yoongi's laptop in person. Instead, Yoongi finds it the next school day sitting in his locker, as if he had left it there instead of at Jimin's. It's a pretty clear sentiment that delivers the message very well to Yoongi that Jimin was still mad at him, and didn't want to talk to him any time soon. Yoongi sighs as he stares at the bag in his locker. It's just as well, Yoongi thinks, if Jimin had decided to completely ignore everything and pretend like nothing happened that would probably be worse. At least this way something has changed.

Namjoon looks over from his locker to peer over Yoongi's shoulder to see what he was sighing dramatically at. “Why did you bring your laptop to school?” he asks.

“I didn't.” Yoongi says simply, not particularly up for a conversation about his fight with Jimin.

“Oh, you must have forgotten it at Jimin's.” Namjoon pieces together for himself. Namjoon had played a large part in helping Yoongi with his mixtape, working alongside him, offering input, offering his voice. Yoongi thinks that Namjoon and Hoseok had almost has many parts rapping as he did himself and Yoongi thinks that maybe his tracks are even more precious because of them. Whenever Yoongi finished a track he would always send it to Namjoon first for approval.“Did you get his vocals then?” Namjoon asks.

“No.” Yoongi says before pulling out his books and shutting his locker. He doesn't mean to be dismissive, but he thinks Namjoon understands him well enough to know the difference between Yoongi being distant and Yoongi being rude.

Namjoon looks at him queerly, “Did something happen?” he asks.

“What do you think.” Yoongi replies bitterly.

Namjoon makes a humming noise of understanding. “I think you don't want to talk about it.” he says and Yoongi is reminded of how much he loves and appreciates Namjoon.

. . .

Yoongi doesn't even notice that anything is wrong until several days later.

. . .

Yoongi thinks he's already done everything he can before he gets Jimin's vocals, but he's impatient and he really wanted to finally finish his mix tape, so he pulls up the files on his laptop again to see if there's anything more he can do. The titles have all become like second nature to Yoongi, more instinctive to him and more familiar to him than the skin on his back. He opens the file titled “Let Me Know” and as the track opens into an editable mode, already something looks off.

The display doesn't look familiar, and it most definitely doesn't look like music. It looks like a mess. The next thing that Yoongi notices are the added notes tagged on to his work. Adding notes was a function Yoongi often used to insert lyrics or as a reminder of what he thought he needed to improve. He certainly had never used the note adding function to insult himself but the note he was looking at very clearly said, “You're a sh*tty friend xoxo”.

A very sick feeling starts up in Yoongi's stomach and threatens to move up as bile in his throat. A very distinct feeling of dread paralyzes Yoongi and he thinks he doesn't want to hit play to test whether or not the tracks had been messed with. Judging by the way the way they looked they most certainly had. Yoongi's throat closes up and his breathing becomes ragged as he scrolls through the track display again and again, hoping that if he did it often enough it would all go away. What the f*ck had happened.

Yoongi wracks his brain for when the last time he had known his tracks were fine and but he knows it was at Jimin's. He asks himself who possibly could have done it and his brain can only give him one answer. An answer Yoongi refuses to accept. Yoongi manages to click the play button on the program and physically recoils at the sound that comes out of his speakers. It was certainly not music but even worse was that it didn't sound familiar at all. It had been distorted beyond recognition into simple clashing noises, random notes, and a complete lack of rhythm Yoongi thinks he could cry, and in fact he does.

For the first little while Yoongi just stares dumbly at his computer screen. He doesn't even notice that he's crying until he feels the drop of something wet hand on his hand and he moves his fingers up to his face to find that his cheeks are wet. Even that revelation does nothing to wake Yoongi out of his stupor as he squints at his increasingly blurry laptop screen, not able to internalize what he's seeing.

Yoongi still hasn't figured out what happened, and he still can't believe what he's seeing, but suddenly there are sobs wracking his body and his hands are covered in tears and he can't breathe and he's panicking. His heartbeat has almost turned into a one constant hum and Yoongi is choking for breath in front of his computer and his vision is going hazy and Yoongi thinks he might be dying. Yoongi hasn't turned off the noise that was apparently the cultivation of three years of work that Yoongi had poured every ounce of himself into but Yoongi has to concentrate on breathing as he clutches his hand to his chest, staring blankly at his computer screen.

His brain isn't being entirely helpful either because it's just running the same loop of a chorus of 'No's as he struggles for breath, wiping at his eyes with his hands which doesn't really work because his hands are soaking wet and Yoongi's keyboard is wet and everything is wet, and Yoongi doesn't understand anything that's happening.

Had Jimin done this? Would Jimin do something like this? Who else could have done this? Yunseo?Yoongi's fingers slip across his keyboard as he searches madly for the clues written in the notes. Yoongi opens up a different file and finds that it too has been entirely demolished in favour of the same mess from the other file, but there are new notes on this one. New insults.

The whole thing feels much pettier and more f*cked up than something Jimin would ever do, and Yoongi hopes to himself that it was Yunseo who did it. Yunseo was petty enough to do this, and it strikes Yoongi as very plausible that Yunseo would be the type of person to do something like this and pretend Jimin had done it. But Yoongi couldn't ignore the evidense that was staring him right in the face.

There are several reasons why Yunseo being the only perpetrator was impossible. The first was that Yunseo didn't know Yoongi's laptop password. Jimin did. The second reason was that while Yoongi had gone through a slow process of slowly introducing the program to Jimin and the chances that Yunseo knew how to work that exact program well enough to do this were slim to none. A third reason was that there were things written in the margins that only Jimin would know. There was even a comment that mentioned the nickname 'Suga' that Yoongi had called his producer alter-ego a few times as a joke.

The evidence is all there are Yoongi doesn't want to believe it.

He wonders if Jimin had decided to do the damage himself or if Yunseo had egged him into it and he decides that it doesn't matter. It didn't matter if Jimin had sat by Yunseo side passively as she did it herself or if Jimin had done the whole thing without her. Jimin had still let it happen, and now Yoongi's entire mix tape was ruined and he was crying uselessly infront of his laptop as if that would bring it back. Yoongi doesn't think that Jimin could have done anything that hurt more.

Yoongi doesn't call Jimin about it, he doesn't call Namjoon or Hoseok to tell them that they wouldn't be working on his mix tape anymore, he doesn't call Jungkook about it to tell him what had happened, or Seokjin or Taehyung, or anyone else. Yoongi sits despondantly in front of his laptop for the next half hour just trying to get himself to stop f*cking crying.

. . .

Over the course of the day, all of Yoongi's friends notice that something is wrong. The first person to notice is Hoseok.who notices bright and early in the morning not a moment after he sees Yoongi.

"You look terrible." Hoseok says and Yoongi looks down to see the rumpled clothes that he had thrown on that day.

"Well you don't look that great yourself." Yoongi says bitterly, moving to his locker.

Hoseok's eyebrows raise and he rights himself up more to lean over Yoongi as he opens his locker. "Yoongi?" He asks, moving so that he can peer at Yoongi as Yoongi leans away from Hoseoks scrutiny. "Are you okay? You look like you didn't sleep at all last night."

"I didn't." Yoongi replies.

"Did something happen?"

" Thing s happen all the time, you're going to have to be more specific."

"Did something bad happen?"

"Bad things happen all-"

"Did something bad happen to you ?" Hoseok asks and Yoongi doesn't respond. Hoseok leans further into Yoongi's line of vision, sticking his head in front of Yoongi's locker. "Yoongi?" Hoseok asks, "Yoongi, Look at me."

Yoongi doesn't look at Hoseok. "Your breath smells, brush your teeth." he says instead.

Hoseok sighs as he leans out of Yoongi's space, letting his head fall back onto his locker. "No it doesn't Yoongi." It didn't. "You just get like this when something happens."

"Things happen-"

"All the time, yes Yoongi, I get that you're being obnoxious." Hoseok tells him. "So what was it? What has ruined this otherwise perfectly lovely day for you?"

Yoongi loved Hoseok, maybe more than anyone else on earth in a very special, very unique, very Hoseok way. And he loved that Hoseok cared enough about him to try and talk to him when he was being obnoxious and he thinks Hoseok knows that. But Yoongi also feels very grumpy. "Try three years," he replies "or more specifically three and a half."

Hoseok considers him for a moment, "That's pretty dramatic, is that why your shirt is inside out?"

"No, my shirt is inside out because life is meaningless and I couldn't be bothered to care about social norms when we all die in the end anyway." Yoongi tells him darkly.

"Uh huh." Hoseok responds thoughtfully. "Sounds like your entire life is ruined."

"It may as well be."

"Yes of course." Hoseok is quiet for a second, then he says "Yoongi, what the f*ck happened."

"It's not important." Yoongi pouts.

"You're making it seem pretty damn important."

Yoongi sighs, closing his locker to look at Hoseok. He didn't know why Hoseok wasted his time trying to get information out of Yoongi, but Hoseok was a great friend and a great person. Thinking about how much of a great person Hoseok was made Yoongi remember what a terrible person Jimin was, and then he's angry again. The entire morning he'd been alternating between angry and despondently sad, and thinking about Jimin again made him mad.

"I don't need your help on my mix tape anymore." Yoongi says.

The way Hoseok's eyebrows shoot up is almost comical, "What?" he asks.

Yoongi waves a non-chalant hand, "Corrupt files." he says vaguely "No backup, a year of work completely down the drain, you know." He has to say it like this or otherwise Yoongi fears he will start crying again.

Hoseok leans sideways, searching Yoongi's eyes as he speaks "Yoongi? You're not being very clear."

"I lost it all, Hoseok. My mix tape is finished. Defective. Kaput."

Hoseok looks like Yoongi had just told him that Santa Claus wasn't real. "Yoongi, what? Are you serious?"

"Do you think I would joke about something like this?"

"No." Hosoek says carefully, "No you wouldn't."

"Now can I mope in peace, please?" Yoongi asks. Yoongi leaves out all mention of Jimin for the time being. Having it be Jimin who'd mutilated his mixtape was probably too much to take in at once and Yoongi doesn't want to talk about everything that had lead up to his and Jimin's fight anyway.

"Yeah, be my guest." Hoseok replies dumbly, looking blankly at his locker. "I'm so sorry, Yoongi." he tells Yoongi earnestly.

"Yeah, me too. Doesn't bring it back."

. . .

By lunchtime, everyone at the table knows about Yoongi's mixtape and no one is talking about it. Yoongi thinks that's just as well. The table is unusually quiet, maybe in mourning for it and Yoongi appreciates the silence; it gives him time to think about how much he hates Jimin. What kind of f*cked up person would intensionally ruin someone's work, especially knowing how much it meant to that person. Yoongi had used to think that Jimin was nice and understanding, but maybe Yoongi had just never made Jimin that angry before.

Yoongi had never expected Jimin to be such a cold-hearted person before, but now that he knew he was never going to let Jimin be a part of his life again.

. . .

After less than a week of radio silence from Jimin, including the lunch that Jimin normally ate with them, Jimin shows up at Yoongi's locker on a Thursday morning and Yoongi turns around and heads in the opposite direction as soon as he sees him. He makes his way upstairs to Jungkook's locker with a story about how he'd 'forgotten his locker combination' and needs a pen and paper to take notes in class. Jungkook smiles his bunny smile and tells Yoongi that he too always forgets his combination. He shows Yoongi that he had written his combination secretly on the back of his lock in case he forgets. Yoongi thinks Jungkook is cute. He feels better.

Jimin is in front of Yoongi's locker at the beginning of lunch so that Yoongi can't get his food without interacting with Jimin. Yoongi is not ready to interact with Jimin, or rather, he never even wants to see Jimin again and so Yoongi has to mooch food off everyone else that lunch. Jungkook gives him one grape. Taehyung gives him a pudding with no spoon. Namjoon tells Yoongi that he'll give Yoongi as much food as Yoongi has brain capacity and then gives him nothing. Yoongi tells them all that he hates them. Hoseok gives him his rice.

Jimin is still at Yoongi's locker at the end of lunch, sitting in front of it, picking at a hole in his jeans dejectedly. Yoongi couldn't care less if Jimin stayed there forever and starved there.

Yoongi stops visiting his locker in general, just in case Jimin sees him the next time, he just ends up bringing a backpack to school and taking it in with him to class. He doesn't think he's solving a problem, but a delayed problem is a problem Yoongi doesn't have to deal with yet.

Yoongi's problem is delayed only for the morning as Jimin shows up at lunch time, and sits at the table in the cafeteria just like he used to do before Yunseo. Jimin didn't normally eat with them on Fridays, and so everyone is very excited to see him. Jungkook grins excitedly in Yoongi's direction but his smile fades when he sees Yoongi's face. Yoongi hadn't planned on being driven away from his friends by Jimin's presense until Wednesday that week and so he's feeling a bit annoyed but mostly like he wants to get out of there fast as lightning.

Yoongi glares at Jimin as he pushes out his chair. 'Don't cry' he reminds himself as he packs his belongings back into his backpack, and then he walks away from the table.

"Yoongi." Jimin's voice calls to him and it's grating. Yoongi flips him off. He starts walking to his locker before he remembers that his locker is not a Jimin-Safe-Area™ and instead he goes to Jungkook's locker where Jimin probably wouldn't go looking for him.

He's about halfway through his lunch, sitting while leaning against Jungkook's locker when a voice calls out to him, "Thought I might find you here." It's not Jimin's voice.

"Jungkook!" Yoongi greets scooting aside so that Jungkook can get to his own locker, "Welcome to my den of solitude."

"This is my locker." Jungkook reminds Yoongi, sitting himself down beside him, knees drawn up and arms dangling casually off of them, "If it's anybody's den of solitide, it's mine."

"I called dibs." Yoongi states casually, scooping rice into his mouth.

Jungkook frowns, "You can call dibs all you want, it's still my locker. My calcium pills are in there."

"You take calcium pills?" Yoongi asks curiously.

"Yeah, my mom says it will help me grow big and tall." Jungkook tells him.

Yoongi snorts, "You're like three feet tall, good luck." Jungkook was Yoongi's only freshman friend but Yoongi had known Jungkook longer than he'd known most of his other friends. He'd known Jungkook when Jungkook was still in diapers and Yoongi kind of feels like he's raised him. Jungkook was probably Yoongi's cutest friend, maybe even the cutest person in the world.

"You're one to talk, what are you 5'5?" Jungkook says in turn and Yoongi takes back everything nice he had just thought about Jungkook.

"5'7 and I'm still taller than you." Yoongi replies.

"I still have time to grow though, I'm only fifteen years old. You're like ancient compared to me. You're done growing."

Yoongi looks at Jungkook and squints, "That means I'm mature."

"Mature and short."

Yoongi sighs and knocks his shoulder into Jungkook making the younger boy smile his signature bunny smile and snicker evilly. Being around Jungkook made life easier, Yoongi thinks, he always somehow managed to be pleasant company, even when he was being a little sh*t. Yoongi offers Jungkook a bite of his food to signify his gratitude but Jungkook makes a face at him and declines.

"Jimin was upset when you just left suddenly, I thought you should know." Jungkook mentions casually and suddenly Yoongi isn't hungry anymore.

Yoongi looks over Jungkook who is playing with his shoelaces, and he feels weird about keeping secrets from him. "You like Jimin right?" Yoongi asks carefully.

Jungkook makes a face, "You mean like in the way you do? Or like normal friend-like?"

Yoongi supresses the urge to throw up everywhere and deny everything. "Like friends." he says, "You like him as a person, right? You like his company?"

Jungkook looks confused, "Oh." he says. "Yeah, of course I like Jimin, why would you ask that? We've been friends for years. Sometimes he buys me lunch."

Yoongi snickers, "Is that all it takes to win your heart?"

"You would know." Jungkook says, picking at his shoelaces again.

The weird wording gives Yoongi pause for a second before he recalls, "Oh right, I used to buy you lamb skewers all the time when we were in elementary school." he says fondly.

"I actually meant to imply that you haven't bought me food in months and that's why I hate you." Jungkook says, pulling at one of the loose strings on his boot and undoing the bow.

Yoongi automatically scoots foreward and sits crosslegged infront of Jungkook. It had been a long time since he had tied Jungkook's shoelaces for him and the idea brings him happiliy back to the old days. Yoongi brushes Jungkook's hands away from his boots so he can pluck the laces up and begin tying them.

Jungkook lets his head fall against the locker as he looks down at Yoongi, "You know I can tie my own laces now. You don't have to do it for me."

Yoongi looks down at Jungkook's other boot disapprovingly, "Not very nicely." he tells him, finishing up his masterpeice. He moves to Jungkook's other foot and unties the laces on that boot as well. Jungkook sighs, Yoongi pretends to ignore him.

"I miss this." Yoongi says softly, as he loops Jungkook's laces together.

"I don't." Jungkook says, but he lets Yoongi finish his work. It relaxes Yoongi to be doing this for Jungkook and he thinks Jungkook knows it. It was easy to forget everything else when he was around the younger boy, there was no mix tape in their little sphere, no Jimin. Just the two of them. When Yoongi finishes with Jungkook's shoelaces he looks dissatisfactorily back at the boot he had tied first, noting that it wasn't nearly as nice as the one he'd just tied. He unties it and tries again. More meticulously this time.

Yoongi looks up briefly to see Jungkook gazing off down the hallway. He looks back down at the laces in his hands. "Hey, whatever happened to that girl you had a crush on?" Yoongi asks, concentrating on getting the loops to look just right.

"The girl?" Jungkook asks curiously.

Yoongi just can't get it right and so he pulls at Jungkook's laces and unties them again so he can start over. "Yeah," he says to Jungkook's boot, "The girl that you were writing that love letter to that one time I came over, you know?"

"Oh." Jungkook says and Yoongi looks up to see more colour in Jungkook's cheeks again, he smiles fondly and Jungkook ducks his head away. "Yeah, uh, I still haven't talked to her."

"You should." Yoongi tells him.

"Yeah." Jungkook says dismissively.

"What's her name?"

"Er, I guess I don't know."

"Well that's not good. Why don't you ask her?"

"Have you met me? I can't talk to girls; I die."

"You should probably stop treating girls like they're a different species."

"You should probably stop avoiding Jimin."

Yoongi tigtens Jungkook's shoelace finally satisfied. He consideres the laces in front of him, admiring his handywork. "Fair enough." he says distractedly. He scoots back beside Jungkook and begins packing up his lunch supplies.

Jungkook sits quietly beside Yoongi as he works, "Love is stupid." he says suddenly.

Yoongi thinks about Jimin. "You're telling me." he says.

. . .

"Yoongi." a voice that makes Yoongi want to sink into the floor addresses his back and Yoongi doesn't even bother to turn around. Instead he grabs his books out of his locker at lightning speed, closes his locker and starts walking in the opposite direction of the voice with quick steps and long strides. "Yoongi!" Jimin says again and a hand reaches out and touches Yoongi's arm. Yoongi shakes it off and starts walking faster. Yoongi wonders what the hell Jimin wants with him. He thinks Jimin had sent him a very clear message when he had destroyed Yoongi's music that he didn't give a sh*t about Yoongi and wanted him to suffer. Jimin really shouldn't be so adament about getting his attention, especially after it had been only a week since the incident.

A hand grabs at Yoongi's arm again, this time with a stronger grip that Yoongi can't shake off, but that doesn't stop him from tugging determinedly at his arm to get the hand to loosen its grip. "Damn it Yoongi, stop running away from me." Jimin says and Yoongi has half a mind to turn around and punch him.

"Let go of my f*cking arm." Yoongi says, looking out across the hallway having not turned around to look at Jimin.

"If I let go of your arm will you run away again?" Jimin asks.

"Yes." Yoongi says.

"Then I won't." Jimin replies. Yoongi tugs at his arm again but Jimin's grip is strong. "Yoongi, look at me." Jimin says.

"No." Yoongi says petulantly.

"Come on, Yoongi, please? Please don't still be mad at me." Jimin says.

Yoongi doesn't reply, he thinks that Jimin's behavior now after everything was sh*ttier than any other thing he could have done. It was like Jimin was guilting Yoongi for being mad. Yoongi hates him just a little bit more. The damage was done, why couldn't Jimin just leave him alone.

"I broke up with Yunseo." Jimin says when Yoongi doesn't say anything.

"Okay?" Yoongi replies unimpressed. Too little too late. Maybe that would have made Yoongi happy had he cared at all anymore about Jimin's well-being, but now it just felt like meaningless placation. Like a throwaway line about something he maybe should have thought of before he sabataged Yoongi. 'Hey I know I got really mad at you when you were trying to tell me something and destroyed something you loved, but I want you to know that now I think you were right.'

"I did it last Wednesday. I made sure you were the first person I told." Jimin says after a moment of silence.

"Okay?" Yoongi says again.

"Are you happy for me?" Jimin asks softly.

"I couldn't care less about you, Jimin." Yoongi tells him.

"Oh." comes Jimin's quiet reply and the hand slips from Yoongi's elbow to lie loosely at his wrist. Yoongi jerks his hand away and walks away from Jimin, not looking back.

. . .

Jimin starts eating lunch with the gang again and so Yoongi has to find an alternative place to go to eat his lunches other than the cafeteria. The first few days Yoongi just leaves the table as Jimin and Taehyung come into the cafeteria together but eventually he learns to avoid the cafeteria altogether. His friends give him weird looks every time he runs out on Jimin because he never bothers to explain things to them; it feels too messy.

Yoongi starts regularily eating lunch at Jungkook's locker because halfway through lunch, Jungkook will usually show up there and keep him company until the bell rings. He thinks that Jungkook spending half the lunch with him and half the lunch in the cafeteria with the other's is more than fair and Yoongi starts bringing Jungkook small snacks and tasty treats to show his appreciation.

A week into their little niche routine Jungkook brings Hoseok with him explaining that no one at the table actually knew where Yoongi went during lunch and that Hoseok had requested to be taken with Jungkook this time.

"Why don't you come to my locker." Hoseok complains kicking the bottom of Yoongi's shoe.

"Your locker is right beside mine." Yoongi tells him, mouth full of food.

"Okay then why don't you sit at your own locker, you idiot." Hoseok asks him.

"This is my den of solitude." Yoongi answers and Jungkook scrunches his nose up at him like he was looking for a fight. "Plus Jimin knows where my locker is." Yoongi elaborates.

"Jimin knows where my locker is too." Jungkook protests.

Yoongi shrugs, "Well he hasn't showed up here yet so that's 0:5 by my count for the den of solitude. You're stuck with me for a while Kookie."

Hoseok frowns sitting down on the other side of Yoongi, "Why don't you just talk to Jimin?"

"Why don't you mind your own buisness." Yoongi says bitterly into his noodles.

Hoseok frowns at Yoongi, "Seriously what the hell happened between you two, Jimin says you two had a fight but he won't tell me anything else."

Yoongi isn't surprsied that Jimin hadn't confessed to what he had done, and he doesn't consider it his responcibility to tell people either. "Sounds like that's all you need to know." Yoongi says.

"No, you guys are definitely leaving something out." Hoseok states.

"Nothing that immediately comes to mind." Yoongi lies.

Hoseok sighs, "Well we all miss you at lunch, Yoongi. I hope you come back soon."

"Unlikely." Yoongi admits.

. . .

After that day sometimes Hoseok will come with Jungkook for the second half of lunch, and eventually Namjoon comes every once in a while. Even Taehyung who had always been more of Jimin's friend has showed up once or twice over the course of the month. It's surprisingly easy to avoid Jimin, he basically only sees him in the hallways and when he does it's easy to pretend he hasn't. Sometimes Jimin will greet him if they pass eachother, but Yoongi never responds and Jimin never makes a second move. It's a great system. Right up until Jungkook shows up at his locker in the middle of lunch with Jimin in tow.

"So this is where you go during lunch." Jimin's voice comes from somewhere above Yoongi. There's a friendly lilt to it and when Yoongi looks up he sees Jimin is smiling at him and Yoongi is suddenly reminded how much he hates him.

Yoongi ignores Jimin and spots Jungkook standing behind him, Yoongi adresses him instead, "Are you f*cking kidding me Jeon Jungkook."

Jungkook shrugs, "He said he was going to follow me whether I consented or not."

"Did you ever think of maybe not leading him to me then?" Yoongi hisses.

Jungkook shrugs.

Yoongi groans and when he looks back up at Jimin he sees that the smile has completely dissolved from his face. "What do you want?" Yoongi asks tiredly.

"We need to talk." Jimin says.

"I don't think we do." Yoongi says bitterly. He was under no obligation to talk to Jimin.

"Yoongi, please stop shutting me out, I'm sorry, okay?" Jimin says.

Yoongi glances over to Jungkook. He doesn't want Jungkook to hear this.

Yoongi sighs and stands himself up, maybe the only way to get Jimin to leave him alone was to tell him exactly what he thought about him. But Jungkook could not be there for that. "Come on," Yoongi says gruffly, "Let's not talk about this here in the middle of the hallway."

"Okay. That makes sense." Jimin says quietly.

Yoongi leads Jimin out of the building and past the courtyard until he finds a reletively quiet place to talk to Jimin under a tree. His demeaner immediately shifts when he has to turn to look at Jimin and engage in conversation with him. It had been a long time since Yoongi had actually looked at Jimin and it hits him all at once how familiar the boy looks. Jimin didn't look any different from the earlier days while Yoongi had still liked him, and it strikes Yoongi how little had changed. Jimin looked a little sadder than he usually did around Yoongi but otherwise he still looks like the same guy. It's disorienting.

"Alright let me make this quick, Jimin." Yoongi growls, "Leave me the f*ck alone."

Jimin looks at Yoongi with his eyes wide, "What the hell?" he asks.

"Did I stutter?" Yoongi snaps.

Jimin closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, "Okay, I get that you're mad at me, and the thing is that I wanted to talk to you so that I could apologize."

Yoongi's jaw tightens. "Oh, well you can take your apology and shove it up your ass."

Jimin's eyes get round and wide again as he takes a step back. "Jesus Christ, Yoongi, what the hell?"

Yoongi really does not want to deal with Jimin. He really doesn't. And he really doesn't like the way Jimin's dejected expression makes him feel like he's doing something wrong. "If you don't like the things I'm saying to you then I cordially invite you to leave." he grits out.

"I'm not going to leave, Yoongi." Jimin says, looking at the ground like he's trying to ground himself, "but I don't understand why you're so mad at me."

Did Jimin actually not understand that destroying Yoongi's mix-tape would upset him? Yoongi wants to punch Jimin right in his pitiful frown. "Don't lie to me, Park Jimin." he says.

"I'm not!" Jimin exclaims, looking Yoongi in the eye imploringly. "Explain it to me Yoongi, I want to understand what I did wrong, I want to make this better."

"Oh, f*ck off." Yoongi wonders if this is some sort of sick joke or whether Jimin is really this stupid.

"Seriously?" Jimin says, "That's what I get?"

"I could punch you." Yoongi offers.

"What? No. Okay, shut up. Let me talk." Jimin says shaking his head, "I'm sorry Yoongi, for everything I've ever done to hurt you, I really am from the bottom of my heart. I should have listened to you from the very beginning and I'm sorry, it was just really hard for me to-"

Yoongi interrupts him,absolutely never wanting to hear Jimin monologue about how he was sorry. "I don't want to hear your excuses, Jimin. I don't want to hear you talking in general."

"Yoongi, I'm trying to apologize."

"I don't want an apology."

"Then what do you want?"

"I want you to leave me alone."

Jimin sighs and starts rubbing at his eyes, "f*ck, Yoongi." he says. "Well I don't want to do that." his voice cracks, "Just tell me what I can do to make it up to you."

"Nothing. You can't do anything. Please leave me alone."

"Yoongi please," Jimin says and his eyes start to reflect more light as they well with water, "I made a mistake, okay? I don't want to lose you as a friend. You're important to me."

Jimin looks absolutely broken and Yoongi feels no pity for him. "Maybe you should have thought of that before." Yoongi says.

"Christ, Yoongi." Jimin turns his body away from Yoongi to hunch over and press his palms to his eyes. Yoongi thinks Jimin deserves this. He watches Jimin's back shake and listens to his laboured breathing as Jimin tries to pull himself together and Yoongi only distantly thinks that he should want to comfort Jimin. Old Yoongi would never have let Jimin cry like this, but Old Yoongi also still had a functional mix tape.

Eventually Jimin's breathing becomes less laboured as he rights himself again, "In relationships you're supposed to accept people as they are, even the mistakes they make. Please give me another chance, Yoongi."

"No, Jimin." Yoongi says. Relationships shouldn't be unconditional. Not if they hurt you.

"You said you loved me." Jimin argues weakly.

"I don't." Yoongi tells him, although part of him knows that it will always be partially a lie.

"Yoongi, talk to me." Jimin pleads with him, "I know how you get when you're holding something back, just please talk to me."

"You really want me to say what I think?" Yoongi asks bitterly.

"Yes, I need to know."

Yoongi takes a deep breath, absolutely prepared to give Jimin a piece on his mind. "I think you're a sh*tty person and a sh*tty friend." he begins and Jimin's lower lip trembles. Yoongi continues. "I think that you like to pretend that you're a good person, and I think you've managed to delude yourself into actually believing it by doing menial meaningless tasks for your friends and submerging yourself in their gratitude. But that's just not true and the selfish, f*cked-up person inside you always comes out in the end. I think you do a whole lot of pretending, Jimin, and I am so sick of having to deal with you."

Yoongi watches Jimin's face break just a little more after every word that he says but he pushes on because he's angry, and Jimin had hurt him, and Yoongi is petty. "I don't think you understand what 'wrong' means because the person inside you simply isn't a good person. You're fake and a hyprocryte, and you're deplorable. You are not worth my time Park Jimin. You're not worth anyone's time. God. You're literally such a piece of sh*t, f*cking guilting me because I don't want to talk to you? Maybe you and Yunseo really deserve each other."

"f*ck. I don't care. I really don't care about you Jimin."

At first Jimin doesn't say anything. He doesn't look at Yoongi; doesn't move at all. He just stares at the same spot on the ground as the wind plays gently with his hair. "Oh." Jimin says quietly, he's stopped sniveliing, now he's looking over at the ground with a distant expression on his face, "Now I know how you feel about me."

"Now you know." Yoongi says.

Jimin is quiet for a moment. He kicks at the grass under his feet with his shoes. "You're an asshole, Min Yoongi."

"f*ck you too, Park Jimin." Yoongi says before finally brushing past Jimin, hoping that he had said enough to get Jimin out of his life forever.

. . .

As Yoongi tells Minji about his broken mixtape and his broken dreams her expression changes from vaguely skeptical to abject horror. “HE DID WHAT?!” she exclaims.

Chapter 5: Relevations

Chapter Text

For Yoongi's entire, thrilling story of friendship, trial, and betrayal, Minji had been watching him with a vaguely skeptical, vaguely suspicious expression. She had given up on eating about half way through the bewitching tale and rested her chin on her hands to blink at Yoongi boredly.When Yoongi tells her about how he had found out that Jimin had destroyed his mixtape in a fit of rage, Minji's expression shifts immediately to abject horror.

“HE DID WHAT?!” She exclaims, hand dropping from her chin and hovering suspended over her forgotten plate. Her eyes are blown wide, brows pressed tight together.

“Yeah, I know, surprised me too.” Yoongi confirms, frowning.

Minji shakes her head, blinking furiously with furrowed brows. “No, seriously. He did what?”

Yoongi eyes her as she valiantly searches his own eyes for the truth. Yoongi decides to deliver it the conventional way instead. Verbally. “Destroyed my mixtape?” he suggests.

Minji blinks. Then she leans back in her chair, eyes so squinted they could arguable just be shut. “No he didn't.” she says stubbornly.

Yoongi squints back. “Yeah well, I would know.” he reminds her.

Minji continues to look at Yoongi skeptically. She doesn't speak. Neither does Yoongi. Both of their dishes lie forgotten before them and Yoongi begins to feel paranoid that maybe Minji can see all his secrets in his eyes by the way she hasn't stopped staring at him. “Give me some time to process this.” Minji says finally, averting her eyes to furrow her brows at the table. “What the hell.”

Her fingernails click on her plate as she drums her fingernails against its edge. Yoongi considers her carefully. “Take all the time you need,” he says. Judging by the slightly bored, slightly airy way that Minji had been listening to him before, Yoongi had not expected such an engaged response. Maybe he had really destructed her entire world view of how sh*tty friends could be. He could empathize.

Minji's eyes flicker back up to Yoongi, her forehead still deeply wrinkled as she scrutinizes him. “And you've never told anyone,” she says dubiously, drawing out the syllables of the words carefully.

“No.” Yoongi confirms.

Minji licks her lips as she observes him. “Okay,” she says unconvinced. “That's kinda weird.”

“I mean, I guess?” Yoongi says defensively. “I mean you don't have to believe me or anything but I don't really have any reason to lie either.”

Minji purses her lips, looking Yoongi straight in the eye intently. “I don't-” she draws out, “think you are lying.” the tone of her voice shifts as he co*cks her head to the side squinting her eyes. “Which is weird.”

“That's because I'm not lying.” Yoongi says and Minji answers him by just staring at him more.

“How-uh, do you know it was him?” she asks suspiciously, thumb rubbing against the side of her plate. She looks down at her nails.

“Well the personal messages about things that only he could know helped me piece it together.” Yoongi says.

Minji's eyebrows draw even closer together, “Personal messages?” her fingers still as she eyes Yoongi. “Like what?”

Yoongi pushes his hair back with his hand, “Christ, Minji, I don't really remember, it's been years.” He absolutely does remember. “But I do remember that he used the nickname that I used to call myself; Salt? Pepper? Sugar? No, I remember now, Suga. Yes.”

“Oh.” Minji says dumbly, staring at her plate again.

“Yeah it was a pretty dumb name.” Yoongi bluffs. “Anyway, are you surprised that I wasn't lying about Jimin being such and asshole?”

Minji is looking at the table again. She reaches towards her cup of water to bring it to her chest. “Um, yeah. I guess.” she says, looking down at the water in her glass, she takes one hand off of it to gesture vaguely. “I mean I've heard other people talk about this Jimin and it doesn't sound like something he would do.”

“Yeah well, people can surprise you.” Yoongi says bitterly.

Minji considers Yoongi, playing with her cup in her hands, “Yeah,” she says, “they can.” She sits quietly for a moment, “And you've really never told anybody this? Why?”

Yoongi laughs and scratches the back of his head, “Well, it's just that Jimin's been a part of our friend group for so long and I didn't really want to mess that up, so I just didn't tell anyone what happened specifically, leaving it to their speculation. It was only me that really didn't want to be his friend anymore, my other friends didn't need that information in their lives.”

“Oh.” Minji stares at her hands while she plays with her cup, “It sounds like Jimin doesn't appreciate what you do for him.”

Yoongi recoils and shakes his head, “Oh, I don't do it for Jimin, Jimin can suck a dick for all I care.”

“So you've never forgiven him?”

“Should I?” He asks incredulously, embarrassed by how his voice wavers. Don't f*cking cry Min Yoongi it's been five years.

Minji looks back down at her cup, tipping it towards her and watching the liquid sloshes forwards. “No.” she says with finality, “I guess you shouldn't.”

Yoongi looks at Minji, really looks at her and in that moment he thinks she looks really small. “Thank you.” he says. “Anyway, the point of this story was not only that Jimin is a douchebag because I already knew that, the point is,” Yoongi stops for dramatic effect, “Do you really think I'm enough of an asshole as to destroy my friend of four year's mixtape just out of spite because he insulted my girlfriend? Or does Jimin have me beat in the asshole department?”

Minji doesn't answer for a moment, her expression looks like she's doing advanced calculus in her head as her eyes flick back and forth, “If what you say is true,” Minji says slowly, “Then I think maybe Jimin has you beat in the asshole department.”

Yoongi grins across the table at her, “That means a lot to me, Minji.”

. . .

After Minji's revelation that maybe Yoongi maybe isn't the biggest asshole in the world there is a shift somewhere in the way she treats him. She's quieter, but less in the cold-shoulder sort of way and more in a lack of knowing what to say sort of way. It's not a dramatic shift; Minji does her thing in her sphere of the restaurant and Yoongi does his, but Yoongi thinks change is gradual and maybe they're finally taking steps in the right direction.

But then again maybe things have shifted more dramatically than Yoongi gives it credit for. Yoongi takes care to note all the things that happen that he could have sworn never had the potential to happen before. For instance one day Minji softly touches Yoongi's arm to get his attention, which, considering her insistence for personal space earlier, is a significant improvement.

It happens on a normal day like any other and Yoongi is at his work station. It doesn't surprise him that he feels a hand softly touch his forearm, but it does surprise him to find Minji there when he looks over his shoulder. Minji had never voluntarily touched him before, and the way her fingers gently ghost over his skin is much softer of an action than the punch in the face that Yoongi would have earlier assumed was the only time Minji would touch his apparently corrosive and cursed skin. He stares at her hand, pondering at it until she quickly withdraws it.

“Sorry.” Minji says quickly.

“No, it's okay.” Yoongi tells her genuinely. It is soft and harmless.

After that Yoongi begins to notice the little things. Minji’s stopped even discreetly glaring at him when his back is turned. Instead sometimes he finds her considering him, lost in thought until they make eye contact and she’ll quickly avert her gaze. In general her expressions are much less hardened around him. Even if Yoongi critiques something about her Minji is a lot less withdrawn about it and takes it in stride. When it had been raining outside and Minji had come into work in muddy slip on shoes Yoongi had complained about her trekking mud all over his kitchen and she had actually smiled.

“Why don't you get a bicycle or something to get to work, you're going to scare off all of our customers. We're not going to pass our inspections because of you.” Yoongi tells Minji disapprovingly as he leans over where she's sitting on one of the chairs in the dining area. The restaurant doesn't open for another hour. Minji takes a pair of sneakers out of her bag

“Unless you're offering to drive me, it looks like we're going to have this problem for a while.” Minji says while taking off her flats.

“Bicycles are better for the environment.” Yoongi replies.

“Better than walking?” Minji asks, glancing up at Yoongi and smirking.

“Better than me driving.” Yoongi replies, “And also better than inconveniencing me, the steam that comes out of my ears, you wouldn't believe the repercussions on the ozone layer.”

“You know, steam is just water vapour, right?” Minji smiles, putting her shoes in her bag.

Yoongi frowns. She had got him there. “Hey, shut up.” he says and Minji snorts. Yoongi thinks that might be the first time he has ever made her laugh.

. . .

Clean up days with Minji become a lot more pleasant within the following days. Minji smiles more, talks more, even listens more. She'll spend more time working in the same rooms as Yoongi and less time with her headphones in. Minji also offers more help to Yoongi, stops recoiling when he accidentally touches her, doesn't move away if Yoongi gets too close. Yoongi finds that he too is smiling more often, talking more often, and even enjoying himself from time to time.

“So I've been thinking.” Minji says suddenly as she mops the floors in the kitchen.

Yoongi turns away from scrubbing the stove top. “That's never good.” he teases.

Minji doesn't respond, instead she just continues. “And I was thinking,” she mindlessly draws the mop back and forth, “that maybe Jimin didn't actually destroy your mixtape.”

That had come out of left field. Yoongi stills, “What.” he says. It's almost insulting that Minji seems to assume that the thought has never crossed his mind, especially considering the fact that he was the one who knew and loved Jimin in the first place. The fact remains that no one else had the resources or the time. Occasionally the idea still intrudes on Yoongi's fragile peace of mind, but every time it appears to try to seethe light of day, Yoongi doeshis damn best to shove that thought into the deep dark recesses of his mind. However, as he is unprepared when Minji brings up the subject with her tone careful but determined, Yoongi freezes up.

“Well you know.” Minji says, toying with the end of the mop, fingernails picking at the wood. “It could have been Yunseo or someone else, you said she was awful and all, it sounds like something she'd do.”

While yes it is true that Yunseo was and is terrible, that doesn't mean Jimin is not also terrible. Yoongi doesn't like the way Minji is acting like she has enough knowledge on the subject to comment on it in any way Yoongi hasn't already considered.“Yes, thank you, you're very helpful.” Yoongi says sarcastically.

Minji sighs, and continues to pluck at the rough grains at the end of the mop. “Like maybe.” she continues relentlessly, “Maybe Jimin had told her the about the things written in the personal messages in a different context, like maybe she just picked them up in other places.”

Trying to absolve Jimin was path doomed from the beginning. The road was a hopeless one, and a dangerous one too.

And Yoongi had been down it many times. It only led in the same damn circular argument, tinged with years of guilt. “Did he tell her my laptop password too?” Yoongi asks, “Did he also explain to her exactly how to use my music program over the weekend but definitely for very legit reasons that happened to come up over the weekend.”

“I don't know.” Minji says, still picking at the wood, her nails clicking against the surface, “Maybe she was also a music producer. Maybe she was a great hacker or guessed your password or something.” Minji hasn't looked at Yoongi for even a second since she started the conversion, “Did you ever ask Jimin if he'd done it?”

It all sounds like the convenient and unlikely rationalization Yoongi has already been through, but Yoongi plays along.“How the hell would that conversation have gone?” Yoongi asks in frustration“'Hey did you happen to sabotage my mixtape by any chance?'” Yoongi imitates himself asking Jimin, then he imitates Jimin, “'Oh yeah Yoongi I love breaking things like mixtapes and your heart thank you for asking'.”

“Christ Yoongi,” Minji says, hands stilling to cover the end of the mop with her palm, “I'm just saying it might not have been him.”

Yoongi sighs. “Well you are making me feel just great about myself right now.”

Minji doesn't look at him. “I'm sorry Yoongi.” she says quietly.

“Yeah, I guess that would actually make me the biggest asshole in the world, wouldn't it.” Yoongi says without humour, “But Yunseo would also be a top contender.”

Minji co*cks her head to the side, “Depends on what you did afterwards.” she says

“Well f*ck.” Yoongi says by way of explanation. “I was upset, Minji. I'd worked on that mixtape for years.”

Minji's eyes are wide and curious as she looks at Yoongi, thumb brushing the irritated head of the mop end. “What did you do?”

Yoongi doesn't really feel like reliving his past mistakes. “I told him to f*ck off.” he explains vaguely. “Well, I guess I said a little more than that.”

“You're kinda an asshole.” Minji teases, smile playing at her face.

“Yeah, I'm getting that vibe.” Yoongi says.

Minji's tone adapts a curious lilt, “What would you do if you found out Jimin really hadn't done it.”she asks.

Yoongi considers the question carefully. “Go into hiding?” he suggests. “I don't know.”

“That bad, huh.” Minji says.

“You have no idea.” Yoongi replies.

“And right after Jimin had gotten out of that sketchy relationship.” Minji adds.

Yoongi sighs. “Don't rub this in.” he says, “You've already succeeded in making me feel bad.” Yoongi's stomach feels as if it were completely empty of food and is now trying to sustain itself by eating the rest of his insides. He feels sick, and nauseous, but not so much that he wants to throw up his food and more like he wants to throw up his entire insides; organs, life, and soul included.

Minji shrugs and grins, “As long as we both agree that you're an asshole.”

Yoongi coughs a laugh. “You need to not be so rude to me Minji.” he tells her, “I may be an asshole but there's no way you could have known that when you first met me.”

“Fair.” she says. She goes quiet and chews on the inside of her cheek. "I guess if you're guilty of treating someone badly because of the assumptions you made, I'm not the person to judge you for it.I guess assumed a lot of things that I shouldn't have.” she purses her lips and looks back to the mop in her hands. “I misjudged you.” she says. “You know, I don't think you're so bad actually.”

Yoongi squints an eye in Minji's direction. “You say this even after you basically just accused me of possibly hurting a very confused and innocent Jimin right after he left a sh*tty relationship and needed his friends.”

“That was kinda a dick move.” Minji says.

“Yeah.” Yoongi agrees.

. . .

It is not too long before him and Minji have a routine, and so it throws Yoongi off when one day she brings along Taehyung for their nightly cleaning routine, or rather Taehyung just stays past his shift and hangs around the kitchen until closing. Yoongi is just coming back from having changed out of his cooking uniform when he finds that Minji is not alone and is talking to Taehyung.

"Tae," Yoongi greets in surprise, seeing him dressed in his casual clothes and leaning on the counter talking to Minji.

Taehyung grins, “Hi.” he says as both he and Minji turn to face Yoongi.

“Are you going to help us clean today?” Yoongi asks, confused. He wonders if Taehyung had been added to their cleaning crew. It would make sense, from Junmyeon's point of view Taehyung could be a moderator since he was friends with both Minji and Yoongi, an extra pair of hands, and a sort of supervisor to report back whether or not Minji and Yoongi tried to kill each other over the night.

“Hell no.” Taehyung says still grinning, “I don't do more than I'm paid to do.”

Yoongi nods, and then Minji says, “Taehyung said that he had no food at home but an abundance of expired food here so he decided to steal from the kitchens.”

Taehyung shrugs: a testament to him being a lawless criminal and not caring about the consequences. Yoongi admires his brazenness but knows he can take advantage of his disregard. He eyes Taehyung amused, telling him seriously “I hope you're planning on making something for me if you want me to be an accomplice.”

“Nuh uh.” Taehyung says immediately, shaking his head, “Minji told me all about how you made dinner here for yourself and her, this kitchen is officially fair game.”

Yoongi looks at Minji scandalized, “That was one time.” he says before shaking his head disapprovingly at the ground, “This is what I get for being nice.”

“I can cook for you guys.” Minji posits grinning. “Have you ever noticed, Yoongi, that it's always you who's doing nice things?”

Yoongi is taken aback. “I've noticed,” he says reservedly.

“Yes, right.” Minji says without missing a beat, “Well I think it's time we changed that. I'm a nice person, you know.”

“Sure.” Yoongi says. All things considered, she had given up on her witch hunt of Yoongi the day he had stopped clapping back. “I mean I imagine there's a reason everyone likes you," Yoongi elaborates, "and it's probably not just because you're pretty.” He means it as a backhanded compliment but Taehyung lets out a surprised snort, covering his mouth with his hands.

“Um.” Minji says awkwardly, “Thanks, Yoongi.” She says, looking at Taehyung and Taehyung snorts again. She frowns. “Right. Yes. Food. You want me to make it?” Taehyung is still dying, hands covering his entire face and shoulders shaking.He walks out of the room with his head in his hands chortling.

“Uh, yes.” Yoongi confirms, eyeing Taehyung as he walks away

“Have I ever even cooked for you?” Minji asks curiously as she walks towards the refrigerator.

“Uh, no?” Yoongi replies puzzled.

Minji stops in her tracks and blinks, and shakes her head, “Oh right, yeah. Of course not. Sorry, I wasn't thinking.” She shakes her head looking at the ground. Then she looks up at Yoongi again.“Anyway, do you wanna get Tae to help you with the cleaning instead of me while I cook?”

Yoongi laughs, “Oh is that why you're cooking? Trying to escape from cleaning?” He grins and raises his eyebrows, a small smile begins to play on Minji's lips. Yoongi thinks it might actually be really easy to get Minji to smile. “You're not nice at all, are you? Ah, well you get away from it this time because you're sneaky, but next time I'm cooking.”

Minji shrugs, smiling “You got me.” she confirms, “Now go find Tae and tell him.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah.”

. . .

“You treating Minji well?” Taehyung says, leaning on a table that Yoongi was cleaning near.

Yoongi glances up at Taehyung briefly, surprised by his question. Him and Taehyung have been friends for much longer than Taehyung has even known Minji. Taehyung should be defending Yoongi's honour by checking on Minji, not the other way around. “Shouldn't you be asking Minji that question?” Yoongi says.

Taehyung shrugs, “I'm asking you now.”

Yoongi sighs and shakes his head disapprovingly, “Yes, I'm being very nice, give me more credit you jackass. Minji even just said that I did all the nice things, didn't you hear her?”

Taehyung tilts his head in affirmation“Yeah, she did say that, I was just checking what you thought.” he tells Yoongi innocently.

“Okay, well I think that I've been pretty damn nice lately.” Yoongi tells him.

“Do you like Minji?” Taehyung asks raising his eyebrows expectantly and grinning.

Yoongi stops scrubbing at the table to look at Taehyung, “Well I mean, when she doesn't arbitrarily hate me for no apparent reason she's pretty alright, I guess.”

Taehyung nods, pursing his lips with the corners of his mouth pointing down, “Makes sense.” he affirms, and Yoongi turns back to the table to scrub at it again.

“Do you still hate Jimin?” Taehyung asks suddenly, making Yoongi's hand stutter slightly on the table and make a strange wiping noise.

Yoongi sighs, “Obviously.” he says, resuming scrubbing. This table had some old lettuce stuck to it and Yoongi was having trouble getting it off.

Taehyung hums. “Are you ever not going to hate Jimin?” he asks.

Yoongi starts to pick at the lettuce with his fingernail, “Probably not.”

“But you like Minji.”

“I guess?" Yoongi says.

“You do like her.” Taehyung presses presumptuously, grinning. “I mean, come on Yoongi, you don't tell people that you don't like that they're pretty. You like Minji, I can tell.”

Yoongi thinks he can do whatever he wants and that doesn't mean anything about what he thinks about people. “Sure.” he says. Damn Taehyung and his giant heart and optimistic outlook on life. Taehyung generally wants everyone to get along, especially when those people are people that are dear to him. That's why he has never been on board with Yoongi shutting Jimin out completely,evident even five years later when he asks Yoongi about Jimin as if magically something had changed between them.Yoongi sighs in frustration at the piece of lettuce.

But, in retrospect, maybe something had changed. Now that Minji knew about Jimin and Yoongi wasn't completely alone in the burden of his knowledge, the whole situation between him and Jimin feels more palpable. It is as if it is now something that exists even outside of Yoongi's head. And the more palpable it feels, the more Yoongi feels he can address it. It's been approximately five years since he's seen Jimin, maybe things have finally matured.

“How is Jimin, though?” Yoongi asks finally, holding his breath. Whether he admits it to himself or not, Yoongi wants to know, and maybe, just maybe he's a little worried about what had happened to him after Yoongi turned him away so coldly.

Taehyung coughs a laugh, “I'm sorry?" He says. "Did you just ask about the well being of Jimin?"

The lettuce on the table is mostly gone but Yoongi continues to scrub vigorously at it. "Yeah," he says. “How is he doing these days? What is he up to? How did he take his breakup?”

Yoongi can feel Taehyung leaning on his broom behind him, but doesn't turn to look. “You mean his breakup with Yunseo?” Taehyung asks, amusem*nt colouring his voice, “Like five years ago?”

Yoongi internally winces. “Yeah.” he says, “So they stayed broken up?”

Taehyung takes a moment to respond. “Yes.” he says slowly.

“Oh,” Yoongi says, hand stilling as he checks to see if the lettuce has disappeared. It has. “Good.” he says.

“Uh huh.” says Taehyung.

Yoongi scrubs at the table, all dirt long gone and Taehyung's eyes burning holes in his back. “Shouldn't you be working?” he huffs eventually.

“I'm not even getting paid, you should be happy that I'm helping at all.” Taehyung says brightly.

“I'm ecstatic.” Yoongi deadpans, “Now clean the damn floors. You've been working on them for the last half hour.” Taehyung raises his arms in surrender and backs off the table. Yoongi glares at his back as he walks away “And stop distracting me!” he calls after him.

Chapter 6: Friends?

Chapter Text

Minji keeps doing things that Yoongi had never expected and every time it throws him for a loop. Sometimes these come as pleasant surprises where she'll offer help as an extra pair of hands to Yoongi when she's on her break, or where she'll offer subtly kind words about the food he puts out. Other times it will just be subtle parts of Minji's personality that Yoongi hadn't noticed before that will take him by surprise. For instance, how cringingly uncomfortable her actions get when she's put under pressure or how she puts a lot of effort into making sure everyone in the kitchen feels appreciated. But these surprises also come in some of Minji's actions and her weird sense of humour. One day Minji comes into work having bought Yoongi a new boning knife which she introduces with a pun about Yoongi's sex life.

It's safe to say that Yoongi discovers new things about Minji every day; things that his old self couldn't have cared less about but his new self finds endearing. Yoongi had never imagined that he’d laugh nearly as often or as openly around Minji these days, but as surprises go it’s a pleasant one.

But what Yoongi had never even seen coming from a mile away was Minji apologizing.

The day already starts odd when Minji asks Yoongi for a ride home on a perfectly nice day outside. If Yoongi hesitates to agree, it is because he is caught off guard, but he after a momentof floundering he promptly agrees; partially out of curiosity and partially because he wants to.

The ride home that night is strangely quiet. Minji picks at the holes in her jeans, distracted and wordless. The only noise she makes comes from the tugs on her jeans and the hummed responses if Yoongi asks her a question. Yoongi just doesn’t get it, but he also doesn’t get Minji or their relationship so he decides to let the quiet exist in its own right. Minji’s apartment building is easy to find, considering how close it is to the restaurant. He moves into an open parking space at the side of the road and leaves the car running as he waits for her to get out. Minji doesn't budge. She just continues to play with the holes in her jeans.

“Uh.” Yoongi says awkwardly, checking out the window to make sure he hadn’t parked infront of the wrong building “Is this the right place?”

Minji lifts her head up to look out the window, “Oh.” she says, “Yes it is, thank you.”

“No problem.” Yoongi responds.

Minji looks back down at her knees and continues to pick at her pants, making no move to exit the vehicle. “Uh.” She says eventually. “Yoongi.”

Spidey senses tingling, Yoongi turns the ignition off, and takes his hands off the wheel to put in his lap. “Yeah?” he prompts.

Minji's voice sounds very small. “I'm sorry.” she says.

Yoongi shifts, “Um?” he says, “For what?”

Minji finally lifts her head up to look at Yoongi, “I've been such an asshole to you, Yoongi, and I've never given you a reason for it. I just came into the restaurant treating you terribly from the beginning, with absolutely no cause or explanation. I can’t imagine how that must have felt for you. I've been rude to you, I've insulted you, and it was all incredibly mean of me to do that and I'm sorry.” She sighs and looks back down at her hands. “You didn't deserve that. Not any of it.”

Yoongi swallows around the lump that had formed in his throat. Minji had made him feel a lot of things by villianizing him so determinedly. It had acted as a sort of as a confirmation that he was as offensive and debased as he always felt he was and her new words now stick in the back of his throat like a pill he swallowed wrong.

Minji is apologizing to him. The one person who had been honest to him was apologizing for it and Yoongi wonders if she should really feel guilty for it. A girl sits in his passenger seat, avoiding his eye, telling him that she's the one who had done wrong by telling him what he thinks he should hear more often. The girl that tries valiantly to be a positive impact on everyone was apologizing to Yoongi for treating him like a hopeless case and all Yoongi can think is that maybe she was right to do so. She couldn't have chosen Yoongi as arbitrarily as Yoongi would like to think, she must have sensed something off about him, but now her humanistic ideals are kicking in and she's trying to see the good in Yoongi and it almost hurts to see her valiant effort after all Yoongi had done was to stop constantly insulting her. He'd hurt Minji too, in the end.“Maybe I did deserve it,” Yoongi says, “I just didn't know it at the time. I mean I did end up saying some terrible things to you too.”

“No, Yoongi.” Minji sighs, shaking her head. “The way you acted was reasonable," she says and maybe Yoongi wants to disagree. "I think I owe you an explanation." Minji continues, eyes on the dashboard and away from Yoongi's gaze. "This has all been entirely my fault.”Shetakes a deep breath, looking back at her hands.

Yoongi is thoughtful for a moment. “I think I'm responsible for my own actions.” hesmiles and Minji glances up at him again.

“Okay, well I’m going to go ahead and say that I did most of the damage.” Minji says, “I was needlessly hostile to you in the beginning, I just thought- well I thought-” she pauses to chew on her lip before switching gears. “Why don’t you hate me?” She says eventually. “I’ve been nothing but mean to you.”

Yoongi watches her, all the malice he had felt for Minji long ago having dissipated. A very small and self conscious Minji looks at her hands and Yoongi thinks that everyone has to learn from their mistakes somehow. If Minji is willing to recognize and confront her actions, then maybe that was Yoongi’s cue to deal with the situation at large. “Yeah.” He says “Well, it’s kind of hard being literally the only person who could ever hate you, I guess.” Yoongi does his best to make eye contact with the girl in his passenger seat who is steadfastly looking at her hands. “I don’t really see you as a person who would actually ever intend to hurt someone else, you just kinda disliked me in the beginning and it got out of hand. I guess it doesn’t matter anymore why you hated me. We're both assholes in the end.”

“You’re not an asshole.” Minji responds immediately to her hands. She exhales slowly. “I was wrong, you’re really not. I guess we make each other worse people.”

“That's fair.” Yoongi confirms.

Minji breathes out a laugh. “I guess we should stop that now though.” she says. “You're a good person, Yoongi. I never thought I would admit this but you really are. I hope you know that.” Yoongi's throat closes up. The statement comes as an unexpected shot to the heart as he hears words of encouragement from his sworn enemy. Yoongi’s stomach bubbles uncomfortably and his chest tightens.

Yoongi snorts, “Yeah, okay.” he says trying to take the heat off himself. “You’re not so bad yourself, I guess.”

Minji smiles softly down at her hands. “Wow thanks.” she says.

Yoongi sighs, “No, really. I think you got too caught up in whatever we had going on, but I think you really try hard to have a positive impact on people, and I think deep down you really care about others. I've never seen anyone impact everyone's good mood and hearts as much as you do, well I guess except Hoseok, he does that too. Point is, I think that underneath us, you're a good person. Just avoid villainizing people you just met in the future and you’ll be a saint.”

Minji doesn't look up from her hands for a long time. “Oh.” she says. She moves he hand up to rest on the door handle and pulls on it, clicking the door open, still not looking at Yoongi. “Thanks, Yoongi.” She says quietly, looking at her hand on the door handle.

“You're damn welcome.” Yoongi replies.

Minji doesn't respond, Yoongi wonders if he's done something wrong. She opens the door and steps outside, pausing just on the outside of the car with her hand on the door. “I'll see you at work.” she says finally.

“Yeah, uh, see you then.” Yoongi says. Minji moves to lean up out of the door frame to close the door but Yoongi calls again to make her stop. “Hey, we should do this again some time.”

Minji leans back down to look at Yoongi, her hair falling down in strands around her face. “Yeah.” she says hesitantly. “I'd like that.”

. . .

“Hey asshole.” A familiar high voice calls out to Yoongi with an unfamiliar friendly lilt.

Yoongi doesn't look up from his grill, too concentrated on his work, but he smiles. “Minji.” he says “Always a pleasure.”

“Likewise.” Minji says, leaning on the counter next to Yoongi and he briefly glances up at her.

“Do you want something or are you just here to annoy me?” Yoongi asks playfully.

“As much pleasure as it gives me to annoy you,” Minji drawls, “I was actually going to ask you a question.”

“Okay, shoot.” Yoongi says, eyes fixed to the grill.

“Well,” Minji says, “people around work are planning on staying late today to hang out at the bar and I was wondering if you'd like to stick around after closing today and join us.”

Yoongi pokes at the meat on the grill, “Andyou'reinviting me” he asks surprised.

“Yes,” Minji confirms “are you in?”

Yoongi decides not to get too excited about the prospect of spending time getting to know Minji. Instead he decides to play it cool. “I guess if it's only one night with you then it can't be too painful.”

. . .

Hoseok's voice comes in scratchy through the phone, coloured with disbelief. “So you and Minji are cool now?” he says

“I guess?” Yoongi says into the phone.

“Okay.” Says Hoseok, and then a pause. “This is officially the weirdest situation I have ever been in.”

Yoongi disagrees. “It’s not that weird.” he says.

Hoseok hums noncommittally “What the hell is happening with you two these days, I seriously can't keep up.”

“I don’t know!” Yoongi says, “But I’m kinda afraid that now that the dust has settled that I’m going to f*ck everything up again.”

The line crackles as Hoseok takes a moment to respond. “If anyone f*cks everything up, I don’t think it’s going to be you.” he says.

Yoongi tips his head to the side in a motion Hoseok cannot see or appreciate. “I guess.” He says. “She is kinda weird. Have you ever met her?”

There's a pause on Hoseok's end, “I mean I've seen her at the restaurant and talked to her a few times when Taehyung or Jungkook was there.”

“Ah.” Yoongi responds. “Well you’ll see her tonight in any case if you come to the restaurant.”

“Yeah, man, I love getting drunk with the restaurant crew at the bar after hours." Hoseok says. "Plus I'd love-" he pauses for emphasis, "-loveto meet Minji."

. . .

“Minji are you sure you've done this before?” Wheein, the usual bartender laughs as Minji pours vodka into a glass with tequila.

“Shut up.” Minji says in concentration, “I know what I'm doing, I too was a bartender once.”

“Not a very good one, obviously.” Yoongi says, sipping from the drink Minji had made him and grimacing.

“I made it like that because I hate you.” Minji retorts. “Junkookie, yours was fine, right?”

Jungkook looks up awkwardly, “Uh, yeah, it's fine for me.”

Minji looks back over at Yoongi and shrugs, “See, I told you.”

Yoongi groans and pushes away from the bar to stand himself up, “It's not fine Jungkook and I'm going to prove it, I can make a way better drink any day, stand aside Minji.” Yoongi says making his way behind the bar.

Minji abandons her drinks to push Yoongi back away by the chest, “No, no, no.” she says, “I had to beg Wheein to let me back here, now I'm the bartender for the night.”

“Your privileges have been revoked.” Yoongi says, bracing himself against the counter.

Wheein's voice calls from the bar, “Let him do it, Minji! I'm tired of your shenanigans!”

“What!” Minji exclaims turning around to look at Wheein and allowing Yoongi to casually slip by her. “Has he even been a bartender before? Why do you trust him?”

Wheein co*cks her head at Minji, “I've known Yoongi longer,” she turns to look at Yoongi “plus he's cute, look at him.” she grins. Yoongi smiles and closes his eyes, touching his face with his hands.

Wendy laughs, eyeing Yoongi up “You call that cute?” she says.

Wheein shrugs, “Well I mean, I'm cuter but it's not a competition.”

“It's not?” Minji challenges, “Because that sounds like a challenge. Cutest person gets to make drinks.”

“A cute-off!” Jongdae exclaims.

“That's right.” Minji confirms, staring Yoongi down.

Jungkook snorts, “You hate doing cute things, you can't be cute.”

Minji shushes him hurriedly. “It's a matter of principle, Kookie. I may not be cute, but I'm cuter than Yoongi.” Minji sticks her tongue out in Yoongi's general direction and he snorts.

“I think Wheein was quite clear in her preference.” Yoongi tells Minji.

Jongdae ignores the both of them. “I'm great at these, I'd beat both of you.”

Wendy cuts him off, “You're not in the running.” she tells him.

Wheein nods, “Yeah, you're not going anywhere near my bar.”

Yoongi groans, ignoring them. “No, we're not doing a cute-off, I refuse.”

“Then you forfeit?” Wendy asks grinning.

“What?” replies Yoongi, “No. Of course not but we're not doing a cute off.”

“Because you'd lose.” Minji interrupts him.”

“No, have you met me? I'd win, there'd be no competition. But we're not doing a cute-off because we're doing a mix-off. Whoever makes the best drink wins.”

. . .

“Yoongi!” Minji shrieks “What are you doing with my drink?!”

Yoongi, who already has the cup lifted up to his lips gives her a challenging glance as he raises his eyebrow and tips the cup back defiantly, letting the purple coloured liquid trickle into his mouth. It tastes like skittles. Yoongi is floored. Minji squawks and clumsily reaches for the cup that is still precariously resting against Yoongi's lip making the drink spill a little down his chin and the glass clang against his teeth.

Yoongi licks his lips and wipes at his chin with his shirt sleeve leisurely, “Good to know that I have no competition.” he bluffs.

Minji doesn't even turn back to look at him, instead worriedly fretting about the drink that Yoongi had nabbed; putting in finishing touches. “You're not fooling anyone.” she says disinterestedly instead, crouching down to put herself at eye-level with the glass, staring at it intently. “Ew now it has your germs I can't serve this to anyone.”

Yoongi turns away from the counter to go to one of the cupboards in the back where they keep the rare ingredients. “My germs only make it sweeter.” he argues over his shoulder. “As some of you may or may not recall, I am DJ Suga.”

He hears someone's glass hit against the table and a coughing sound come from behind him. “Oh my god.” comes in Hoseok's voice, “I completely forgot about that.” Yoongi grins at the bottles as he searches through them.

“DJ What?!” Wendy's voice calls.

“DJGloss.” Offers Jungkook.

“Jungkook!” Yoongi calls, giving up his search for a moment to turn around and scold him. “That was supposed to just be between you and me.”

“Define 'between you and me.'” Jungkook says, “because I think I told everyone about that the day you said it.”

Yoongi's brows crease and his mouth falls open, the edges pointing down as he looks back at Jungkook, “Fight me birdman,” he says, “don't think I forgot your Seagull phase.”

“I was four!”

“Still counts.”

Jungkook scoffs noisily. Jongdae's lecturing voice adds its sentiments to the conversation. “You see, this is why you don't let friendships last for more than four years, the receipts just keep piling up.”

Baekhyun makes a noise of protest, “We've been friends for eight years.” he says.

Jongdae hums, “No, see we're not friends, we're actually just soul-bonded and tolerating each other. Wheein and I though, our time is almost up, any last things you want to say to be before I end our friendship Wheein?”

“No, it's a relief that I won't have to deal with you anymore actually.” Wheein says, sipping at the drink that Yoongi had made her.

Yoongi pushes himself off the ground with a bottle of coconut rum in his hand. He turns around to see Jungkook looking at him with squinted eyes and his mouth half open. “Seagull was the best though,” Jungkook says as soon as he catches Yoongi’s eye, “he had an awesome mechanic suit that let him fly and punch things super hard, DC Comics really missed out on him.”

“They would have gotten sued because Seagull was basically Iron-man except that he was you.” Yoongi says, pulling the cap off the bottle.

Jungkook grins, “Yeah, he was great.”

A high pitched squawking noise suddenly comes from somewhere to Yoongi's right and he turns his head to see Minji is staring at the bottle in his hands. “Is that coconut rum?” she asks “No fair, that's against the rules.”

Yoongi eyes her for a moment as he plays with the neck of the bottle as it sits on the counter where he had placed it. “We didn't make any rules.” he says.

“Okay then I'm instating a new rule; no coconut rum.”

“What the hell, why?”

“I didn't even know that was there.” Minji whines.

“That sounds like a You problem.” Yoongi replies, picking up the bottle and tipping it into the glass in front of him.

“I hope you're planning on saving some for me.” Minji tells him.

Yoongi doesn't mention the other full bottles in the back, “No.” he says, “I'm going to use it all, just to spite you.” he finishes pouring the drink and closes the bottle. Minji reaches for it and Yoongi pulls it out of her reach immediately and sets it as far away as he can, hand still resting on the neck. Minji makes a noise of annoyance and pushes herself into Yoongi's space, leaning on the counter to reach the bottle before him. Yoongi picks up the bottle and holds it behind his back.

“Min Yoongi, give me the damn bottle.” Minji says stepping back so that she can make another pass at the bottle.

“Never.” Yoongi tells her, again moving the bottle away from her outreaching arms, this time holding it out above his head and stretched as far as he can away from her. Minji, having completely forgotten her qualms about personal space with Yoongi, immediately reaches her arms around him, the fabric of her sleeves brushing against his face as she leans over him and paws at the bottle overhead. It's a strange dance, and Yoongi can't help but grin as Minji leans over him in vain, fingers gripping at his wrists and hands pulling on his arm.

Yoongi thinks the whole operation is going very well and that Minji is an amusing victim until Minji pulls out the big guns and starts tickling him. Yoongi squawks and immediately his grip loosens on the bottle his elbow reflexively gives in allowing Minji to finally get her hands on the bottle. She tugs at it, bringing Yoongi's arm down with the bottle as he stubbornly holds fast to it, even though his fingers feel weak and his body is mostly concentrated on getting Minji to stop tickling him.

Minji's fingers dance lightly across his abdomen, probably ruining his entire reputation with the noises he is making and the way he is screwing up his face, but he stubbornly holds fast to the bottle, the strength in his fingers weakening. Yoongi squints one eye shut, hugging the bottle close to himself and trying to wiggle himself away from Minji as she prods at his sides, making him let loose a stream of giggles that he will never live down. But Yoongi's will to win is larger than his ego and he manages to power through it for another commendable ten seconds before he's pushing the bottle at Minji in submission and begging her stop stop. She does take the bottle, but she does not stop. Yoongi drops to the floor and Minji goes with him, grinning at him all the while, her hands grazing his skin lightly as he curls up laughing on the floor.

“St- o p.” Yoongi manages to wheeze out.

Minji's gleeful face gets blurry as Yoongi tears come to Yoongi's eyes, “First admit that I'm cuter than you are.”

“What?!” Yoongi rasps trying to bat Minji's hands away, weak from lack of oxygen.

Minji moves into a new plan of action as she swings her leg over Yoongi to straddle his hips and stop him from wiggling so much. “I want you to admit that if we had done a cute off that I would have won.” she says.

Yoongi swats at Minji's arms and kicks his legs, contorting his body as he tries to escape Minji's deft fingers as they skate across his skin. “No way.” he wheezes, “I'm adorable and you're-” he's interrupted by his own set of chortles as Minji's hands move to the sensitive skin underneath his biceps, Yoongi manages to grab hold of her wrists and hold them suspended above his face. Minji grins at him.

“You think you're that cute?” Minji says, still straddling him but her hands calm as Yoongi holds her wrists up and away from himself weakly. She moves her arms back and forth gently as Yoongi weakly holds on, head resting against the possible very dirty floor as he gazes up at her. “But don't you think I'm cute too?” her smile grows. She's leaning over him panting, her weight on his stomach, face red from adrenaline and hair loose and dangling from her head. He smile splits her face in half, delighted and childishly entertained.Her expression is soft and unassuming; playful and amused. Yoongi thinks thatholy f*cking sh*t she's right.His gaze darts around Minji's face trying to memorize her in this moment because Yoongi doesn't think he's ever liked Minji as much as he does now.

Yoongi smiles sluggishly at the figure above him. “No.” he tells her.

Minji quickly pulls her hands out of Yoongis grip to lay her fingers threateningly on Yoongi's chest. She leans forward, “Say that again.” she dares him.

Yoongi rolls his head on the ground as he shakes his head, grin growing as Minji's eyes narrow.

Minji's hands raise to play at the hem of Yoongi's neckline, her fingers lightly playing at his skin, making Yoongi shrivel into himself and kink his neck so that the side of his head rests against one of Minji's hands. “Yoongi.” she warns grinning, as she taps the skin of Yoongi's ear with her knuckle “Tell me I'm cute.”

“This is blackmail.” Yoongi informs her, further turtle-ing into his shoulders.

“It is.” Minji confirms, leaning even closer to his face teasingly. “Now admit that you think I’m cute.”

Yoongi's face hurts from smiling, “I don't.” he tells her, “I think you're evil.” Minji hums, apparently delighted, as her fingers tease at Yoongi's collarbone. Yoongi's breath hitches as her nails trace his neck. Minji smells really good. He moves to prop himself up on his elbows, sliding out from underneath Minji to sit up slightly. “I don't even think you're a little bit cute.” he says, taking one arm out from underneath himself to pinch one of Minji's cheeks, stretching her face and making her frown.

“Cuter than you.” Minji protests.

Yoongi scrunches up his face and wiggles his hand around, pulling at Minji's cheek for good measure. “Not even close.” he grins. Minji pouts. Yoongi's grin widens. For some reason his heart is beating at a mile a minute. Yoongi thinks it might be the adrenaline.

It's then that someone finally interrupts them. “Uh, Minji.” Hoseok says and Yoongi finally turns to look at the bar to see that everyone is leaning over the bar staring at them with varying degrees of horror on their faces. Yoongi thinks that Hoseok may look the most horrified. “Can I talk to you?” Hoseok asks Minji, tone flat, face unreadable. Yoongi wonders if Hoseok still held it against her that she had hated Yoongi, he figures that they were over that now, but maybe Hoseok didn't see it that way. He doesn't seem to be approving of what had just happened though.

“Uh.” Minji says, moving farther from Yoongi so that she can use the counter to push herself off the ground. “Yeah, of course.”

“Good.” Hoseok replies with a poker face that Yoongi squints at, still on the floor. He watches as Minji and Hoseok disappear from view behind the bar and eventually moves to haul himself up, resting his hands on the counter, across from everyone else.

“Hoseok's acting weird.” Yoongi says conversationally.

“Yeah,” Wendy says, trailing off to look over her shoulder at Hoseok and Minji who appear to be having an intense whispered conversation “do they even know each other?”

Yoongi finds himself shaking his head before he speaks. “No, they haven't ever really talked, why would they even.”

Wendy purses her lips, “I thought maybe they had been dating this entire time somehow and Hoseok was getting jealous or something.”

Yoongi snorts and turns his head to eye the two of them again. Hoseok is leaning forward towards Minji, mouth moving quickly and eyes narrowed. “I think he's defending my honour or something since Minji and I had that rivalry thing going on, sh*t does he look pissed to you?”

“He doesn't look happy.” Jongdae says.

Yoongi turns to Jungkook who has been quietly sipping from his glass, “Jungkook.” he says. “You're close with both Minji and Hoseok, what do you think is going on?”

The glass that Jungkook was sipping on is still touching his lips and he makes a show of lowering it slowly. “Maybe they're planning a tea party.” he says disinterestedly.

Chapter 7: Harry Potter and the Awkward Dialogue

Chapter Text

It’s late. Yoongi is running on 3.5 hours of sleep because he’s stupid and thought he wanted to pull two all nighters in a row to work on all the small neglected jobs that build up over time, and then, upon realizing how stupid he was being, crashed on the couch for an unfulfilling nap before work. He’s cleaning the tables and putting up the chairs while lost and vaguely sleepy while Minji sweeps the floors with her headphones in. It’s silent but it’s far from uncomfortable and Yoongi takes respite in the time to mull over latent thoughts in the artificial light of the restaurant.

Did you redye your hair?” Minji says suddenly, and when Yoongi’s mess of thoughts clears enough for him to register it he turns to her and finds her headphones nowhere in sight. In retrospect he had only assumed she was listening to music, but now he can’t recall If he’d actually seen the headphones. The information that’s suddenly thrust upon him is that she and him may have just been working in silence for no good reason.

Minji is hardly ever quiet around Yoongi any more, when working during opening hours she’s boisterous and talkative to the entire staff and now that includes Yoongi. She’s foolish at times, no doubt, but she’s cute and well meaning and quick to fall into step with whatever the staff members throw back at her. Yoongi thinks that being quiet doesn’t suit her. Unlike Yoongi, Minji isn’t an intuitive quiet but a learned quiet; a quiet built up over years of overthinking and putting others first.

Minji shifts and Yoongi realizes he had just stared at her in response and gotten lost in his thoughts again. He really needs sleep. He alsodefinitely needs to stop thinking so deeply about Minji's character, no matter how provocative and compellingit is to him that this well meaning soul had hated him so much and then... suddenly stopped.

“Your roots are gone.” Minji elaborates.

Yoongi blinks, “Yeah.” Smooth.

“Oh. It looks really nice." Minji says, "the colour suits you.” Considering that Minji is a beacon of positivity and love the amount of times she compliments someone unprompted are strikingly low. It’s probably because as thoughtful as she is, she also happens to be an awkward bean. Yoongi feels as if heartfelt compliments are always on the tip of her tongue, but getting them out requires some context. This hadn’t had any context, and it doesn’t feel particularly heartfelt either. Yoongi has no idea why she’s decided to comment on his hair now, significantly after he’d dyed it, while they had worked amiably in silence after hours in the restaurant.

“Er, Thanks.” Yoongisays, and then the silence he leaves behind stretches on.

. . .

MInji keeps complimenting him and it’s weird!! Very weird!! Soft spoken compliments about the most menial things accompanied by a nervous smile that never fails to catch him off guard. He usually laughs it off, or frowns and makes a face at her; he really has absolutely no idea how he's supposed to respond. Yoongi begins to think it’s Minji’s way of repenting, making Yoongi feel good about all the small things she had hated before. But it doesn’t make him feel better. It makes him feel weird, and uncomfortable, and like she’s trying to force them out of her for his benefit and it feels very off balance.

His newest strategy is to playfully insult her in response to being complimented, to restore the balance to something less forced and to imply that all the compliments are very unnecessary because he can still be amiable around her without telling her that her skirt is pretty or other such nonsense. Minji, as she does, adapts quickly.

“You’re really funny.” Minji laughs one day, curled over in front of the counter and holding her stomach as a fit of giggles erupts from her throat. “Have I ever told you that?”

“Makes up for your boring ass.” Yoongi tells her, suppressing the threatening smile that plays at his mouth and failing horribly.

“I’m just surprised you actually have a sense of humour.” Minji claps back, “You could have fooled me with the way you grouch around the kitchen.”

“The f*ck?-” Yoongi responds and Minji laughs harder.

. . .

A couple weeks later and Minji's awkward compliments have been replaced with backhanded compliments and Yoongi considers it improvement. “How have you never seen the Harry Potter movies?!” Minji exclaims, dropping the washcloth on the surface of the table to gawk at Yoongi, one hand on her hip. It's late already, she and Yoongi are doing the final jobs of the night. It’s dark outside and the restaurant is dimly lit by the lights on the walls and ceilings.

Yoongi frowns. “I don't know; I just never have. How have you never heard of Coolio?”

“Hey don't change the subject. Also, I'm pretty sure you just made that guy up to confuse me.”

“Oh my god. Coolio is a real guy, just like google him or something.”

“I said not to change the subject. We're talking about your complete negligence of an icon here. Everyone has seen Harry Potter.”

“I haven't seen Harry Potter.”

“Okay, yes I know that now. I feel like I should have known earlier.” Minji says, narrowing her eyes at Yoongi and he shrugs back. “You have that lack of magic in your life vibe.”

“Oh my god.”

“You know, we have to repair this, right?”

“Not really.”

“I'm going to force you to watch the Harry Potter movies even if I have to tie you to a chair and glue your eyes open. We gotta marathon this sh*t.”

“Marathon the entire Harry Potter series? How many hours is that?” Yoongi asks in disbelief without expecting an answer, then he tactfully tags on a “and do we do it at your place or mine?"

That gives Minji pause for a second, “Wait,” she says, “are you actually accepting my offer?”

“Not to tie me to a chair or anything but I'll watch Harry Potter with you if it's this important.” Yoongi replies.

“Oh wait,” Minji stops and blinks at nothing, “You'd really let me come to your place?”

“I mean I've never really seen you out of work.” Yoongi says. “I'm half convinced that after you leave here you just disappear from this plane of existence. We should do something like watch a movie together.”

“Yeah,” Minji says slowly, backtracking, “maybe this isn't a good idea.”

Yoongi shrugs noncommittedly, “I mean, I don’t see why we shouldn’t. I’m not going to watch them otherwise.”

Minji goes into deep thought mode, pursing her lips and squinting her eyes with one hand on her hip. “You do need to watch them.” She posits before shifting her footing “Do you know how long the Harry Potter series is?” she asks, “We can't actually just marathon it. This is a several day long investment.”

Yoongi shrugs his shoulders unceremoniously, “Looks like you're either stuck with my company for a few days, or you're stuck with a co-worker that hasn't ever seen Harry Potter. Sounds like a dilemma.”

Minji huffs a laugh. “It really is,” she confirms.

. . .

“So, this is my place.” Yoongi says, stepping over the non-existent welcome mat and into his apartment. Minji follows closely behind, quietly slipping out of her shoes and leaving them in a pile on the floor following Yoongi's lead. Yoongi heads immediately to the TV set, leaving Minji to follow him and stand awkwardly leaning on one of the couches.

“This,” she looks around the room casually, “feels kind of intimate.”

Yoongi glances up at her from his crouched position on the floor in front of the blue ray. “Don't trash it,” he tells her.

Minji grins, “Then don't fall asleep.”

Yoongi frowns, “ Good thing I don't sleep.” Instead he works on his music and studies into the late hours of the night and then eventually passes out into a state of the undead for a few hours.

“I've seen you asleep at work.” Minji says.

Yoongi does not remember ever falling asleep at work, he doesn't even know how he would have found the time to do that, but he has definitely tuned out everything for extended periods of time. “I was transcending my human form, my vessel goes catatonic when I do that.” he bullsh*ts.

Minji snorts, “Whatever.”

“I mean you could call it sleeping because it looks really similar and is a state of relative inactivity, but technically its a completely different process.” Yoongi tells Minji seriously, waiting for the blu-ray player to actually open so that he can insert the disk Minji brought. He makes a noise of success when it finally does.

“Do you actually think about what you're going to say, or do you just spew whatever random bullsh*t comes to your head?” Minji asks from somewhere behind him.

Yoongi carefully puts the disk on the rack, not looking up. “I have no idea what you're talking about.” he says and then he closes the blu-ray player and heads over to the couch to plop himself down, remote in hand.

Minji eyes Yoongi as she takes a seat at the other end of the couch “Because you were telling the truth,” she offers.

“That's right. I don't lie either.” Yoongi tells her seriously. “It comes with the no sleep thing.”

Minji lets out a short laugh. “Maybe we should just watch the movie.” She says.

The television plays commercials in the background while Yoongi glances innocently up at Minji. “You don't want to hear me tell puns?”

“I don't-” she pauses to squint at Yoongi, “-like you.”

Yoongi laughs, “Pretty sure that's a lie.”

“Actually I'm sitting.”

“I hate this conversation.”

“You started it.”

“I know. I hate it.”

“Okay, just play the movie and we'll pretend it never happened.” Minji laughs.

They get three seconds into the movie, nothing has even happened, only the words “Harry Potter” have appeared on the screen and Minji's already noticeably more excited. “Iconic,” she says about the words on the screen and Yoongi makes a face at her that she doesn't see. The first ten minutes of the movie come with an almost constant narration of the details that Minji thought were important to point out or otherwise excited garbling.

At one point there's a pause where she doesn't comment on anything for a while, but then she says“Five minutes in to Harry Potter and chill and he gives you this look.” and she crosses her eyes at Yoongi and sticks her tongue out of her mouth. It's ridiculous. Yoongi hates himself for laughing.

. . .

Minji has stopped giving her excessive and insightful commentary after about thirty minutes into the movie. Yoongi doesn’t even notice because he is a good citizen who actually is paying attention to the movie. He assumes Minji is quiet for the same reasons. Safe to say, he assumes incorrectly. “Yoongi-” she says almost inaudibly, voice strained from disuse, “-Why is this okay with you? Being here, with me? You should hate me.”

Yoongi’s eyes trail away from the screen as his vision pans over to Minji. “I don’t hate you.”

Minji frowns. “I have been really cruel to you.”

Yoongi frowns back. “We antagonized each other.”

Minji sighs. “No we didn’t. I was really vindictive, and unreasonable. What I did was unforgivable. I haven’t been able to think of myself the same way after how I treated you, I don’t understand how you can just not hate me. How can you be okay with a person that would do something like that? Do that to you. With no good reason! You never did anything wrong to me!”

Yoongi feels unprepared and more than a little uncomfortable with this impromptu feelings session. The thing is that he really just does not hold a grudge against Minji anymore. He feels like they have moved past it; he feels like he’s just gotten to know Minji better. It would be hypocritical of him to hate someone just because they were an asshole, especially after they’ve proved themselves in every other area. “It’s fine. Really.” Yoongi wants to say something that isn’t wholly anticlimactic but he’s not entirely sure how he’s supposed to respond.

“That’s not-” Minji pauses, “I don’t understand why you don’t hate me.”

“I guess I just don’t.” Yoongi replies. Minji says nothing. Yoongi wants to let the silence tell the story but he thinks maybe he should force himself to say something. “We’ve both made mistakes.”

“I made them first. Yoongi I wasn’t right about you.”

Yoongi shrugs.

“No, Yoongi, this is important. Seriously. I’m the one who screwed up, okay? There is nothing wrong with you, you are beautiful, and caring, and good. I feel bad for what I did to you every day. You deserve all the credit for pulling us out of the convoluted mess of how we used to be, I’ve been so awful, and I don’t know how you don’t hate me for it.”

Yoongi is uncomfortable and doesn’t know how to react or deal. So he says nothing and looks at the television.

“I’m so sorry Yoongi, I know I’ve told you this before and it does nothing to reverse what I’ve done. I regret everything I’ve ever done to you.”

Yoongi laughs awkwardly, “It’s not that big of a deal.” He says. “We got at each others throats a lot, but its okay, we get along now, it really shouldn’t matter anymore.”

Minji is quiet, watching the screen. “It matters.” She eventually says. “You didn’t deserve that. Not any of it.”

The uncomfortable churn is back in his stomach again, the one Yoongi has gotten used to whenever Minji is around. The screen of the television plays something incomprehensible as vague images only graze Yoongi’s distracted mind. Yoongi says nothing for a long while.

Minji has proven herself to be a very conscientious person, very thoughtful, careful about how her actions effect others. She’s imperfect but willing to put herself on the line, willing to recognize and deal with her mistakes, and endlessly kind hearted.

And when she’s not putting full effort into how she effects others and how she can do the world good, she’s all lame jokes and cringingly conscientious awkwardness, with a smile hidden right behind her lips and ears always open to learn something new. Minji is quiet company or easy banter, with soft expressions and kind, wise words. Minji is as complicated as she is unpredictable and Yoongi thinks that as much as he’s learned about her, there will always be something about her that he’s overlooked. You can’t hate someone who cares so endlessly and deeply.

And you think there’s something about you I could hate. Yoongi thinks, but doesn’t say.

. . .

Minji has always been a very physically affectionate person around the kitchen. If she's laughing, it's usually with her hand on someone's shoulder and even if she's taking orders she'll spend an excessive amount of time with her hands on the backs of people's chairs. And recently, Minji has begun touching Yoongi. It's always casual; a touch of the wrist to get his attention or a hand on his back if she's leaning over him to look at something. But it’s new, and something about that makes it exciting. Every time Minji touches his waist as she stands beside him or takes his wrist to lead him somewhere Yoongi feels electricity thrum through his veins.

This time she's fallen asleep on his shoulder, only half-way through their second movie. She probably hadn't even realized she was doing it, she had just slowly and haphazardly been slumping further down the couch. Yoongi's cheek is uncomfortably pressed against the wrinkled sleeve of his shirt and his back hurts from the weird way he is bent around the arm rest, but he also does not feel the need to disturb her. Minji is breathing softly, puffs of warm air tickling Yoongi's arm and the soft weight of her head pressed gently against the side of his shoulder, hair tickling at his neck. He thinks she might be drooling because he feels the fabric on his shirt get damp, but he can't stretch his neck out far enough to check.

Minji’s weight is a soft pressure on his shoulder and for some reason Yoongi doesn’t feel crowded. The room feels very empty and cold where Minji isn't touching him. Physical touch has always been a sensitive subject to Yoongi, most of the time it makes him want to shrink back into his skin. It’s too intimate, and it makes him feel like his personal space is being encroached upon and taken hostage. Sometimes it’s too warm that it gets under his skin and other times it just makes him awkward and stiff. But in rare moments like this, it feels almost nice.

Maybe because it’s dark and he’s at home, the air is calm and cool around him and he doesn’t feel like he’s suffocating. But maybe Minji is just becoming more familiar to him. Maybe Minji touching him isn’t so bad because it’s just Minji and she does that and it isn’t that big a deal.

Minji shifts a bit and suddenly her arm is stretched over Yoongi, her hand resting on his stomach and Yoongi's breath catches in his throat. Just for a moment, the feather light weight brushing against the sensitive skin of his abdomen. If he had been told six months ago that he would be at his home with Minji sleeping peacefully against his shoulder, there's absolutely no way he would have believed it. But Minji is there, soft, warm, and present with all her defences down, passed out on him.

He thinks they make an odd pair, former enemies effectively cuddling on a couch. Minji hadn't said anything cruel to him in months, in fact she had been observably careful around Yoongi. He felt different around her these days; lighter; better. She makes his heart do odd little jumps whenever she does something unexpectedly nice or unexpectedly cute and it's definitely messing with his head. She's cute, there's no way Yoongi could deny that now, but she also had carved herself out a little niche hole in Yoongi's heart. A special place reserved just for Minji.

Yoongi also thinks that his head gets corny and kinda fuzzy when people are so close to him for extended lengths of time, so maybe he should stop thinking and get back to watching the movie that Minji had actually come to make him do. He shifts slightly to get into a more comfortable position because his arm is asleep and turns his attention back to the television.

He manages to finish the movie with vague interest as the only awake person in the room, and when the credits roll he's more than tempted to turn off the TV and let himself fall asleep right there because in that moment he feels content and comfortable and very sleepy. But Minji has to go home and Yoongi has to wake up for work in the morning, so it seems like the cards are not in his favour.

Yoongi tilts his head slightly to look at the sleeping figure on his shoulder, seeing only the top of her head and the tip of her nose “Hey.” he whispers softly, shrugging the shoulder that she leans on gently. “Minji.” A small noise comes from Minji's throat but she shifts and blinks her eyes open tiredly. Yoongi can't stop the small affectionate smile that forms on his face. “You fell asleep when you were supposed to be narrating the entire plot to me play by play.” he informs her.

Minji blinks dumbly at her arm that still extends over Yoongi's stomach and then pushes herself off Yoongi enough so that she can look at him sleepily. Yoongi takes his new found freedom as an opportunity to get himself out of his uncomfortable position on the couch, wincing the entire way as he pulls himself up.

“The movies over.” Minji says stupidly staring at the credits. “You should have woken me sooner.”

Yoongi shakes his head and grins at Minji, she's still close enough that he can feel her thigh pressing against his own “Couldn't bring myself to do it.” He tells her and Minji gives him a weird look so he tacks on a “Much less annoying than when you're awake.”

“If I'm so annoying to watch movies with, then maybe you don't need me here to watch Harry Potter with you.” Minji scratches the back of her neck.

“That's true,” Yoongi says, tipping his head to the side “but I also won't watch them by myself so it looks like you're stuck with me.”

“Not for the rest of tonight, I'm not.” Minji says stretching. She picks herself up off the couch and brushes her hands over her shirt, smoothing the fabric. “Are you going to give me a ride home?”

Yoongi leans farther back into the couch lazily, “No, I'm going to make you walk.” he says.

“Sounds like your lazy ass.” Minji grins.

“With that attitude I just might actually not drive you.” Yoongi tells Minji seriously, shutting his eyes and leaning his head back into the couch. Minji prods at his shin lightly with her toe. Yoongi gets up.

. . .

“We should watch the next movie at your apartment.” Yoongi tells Minji, leaning on the counter.

Minji glances up at him, eyebrow raised. “Why?” she asks.

Yoongi shrugs, “I want to see your place.”

Minji doesn't look up this time. “Why?” she asks again.

“Because you got to see my place, it's only fair.” Yoongi says.

“Life isn't fair.”

“I don't have time for existential philosophy right now.”

“But you have enough time to bother me.”

“That's right.”

“I haven't cleaned up my apartment in ages.”

“The more to make fun of you for.”

“How do you even know that I have a TV?”

“You do though.”

“Maybe. I don't have a parking place though. I don't have a car.”

“I'll find a place; I hope you realize how flimsy these excuses are.”

“Ugh.”

. . .

The first thing that Yoongi sees upon entering Minji's apartment is a pair of boxers on the ground. He prods at them with his shoe. “Are these your boyfriend's?” he asks and his stomach does a very unwarranted flip.

“I don't have a- oh.” Minji looks back over her shoulder to look at the underwear on the ground. “No, those are my, uh, roommates.” she says.

“You have a roommate?”

“Yes, obviously.”

“What's his name?”

“Uh.” Minji pauses.

“Forget your roommates name?”

“Yeah, we don't really talk.”

“Okay, well is he going to come here at some point?”

“No, not tonight.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, do you want popcorn?”

. . .

Maybe it's because they're in Minji's apartment and therefore their roles are reversed, but this time it's Yoongi who rests his head on Minji. He has no idea how this happened. About fifteen minutes in, Yoongi had just turned himself completely on his side and rested his head on Minji's thigh, looking at the television sideways without even registering it.

“I love how magic in this world makes math and science and sh*t completely negligible.” Yoongi says, still getting comfortable as he pillows his cheek on Mingi's leg and curls his legs up to fit on the couch.

“What do you mean?” Minji asks from above him.

“Well like, they don't learn any math or science at that school, it's like they have absolutely no regard for it, even though it's obvious that they are missing out on some awesome technology. They don't even have cell phones.”

“Well these movies were set in the nineties.”

Yoongi shifts, “What? How do you even know that? Anyway, still though, like when cellphones get invented they are going to be missing out.”

“Maybe.” Minji replies, “Or maybe they can invent their own magic cellphones. It's best if you don't think too hard about the mechanics of the school though, the first couple books were written for children after all and a magic school that teaches math sounds less fantastic.”

Yoongi hums. “That makes sense. Still weird though. Also they never really address why the magic world is hidden from muggles, or how it was in the first place. It seems kind of weird to have two different worlds that run almost completely distinct from one another for no discernible reason.”

“It probably has something to do with witch hunts. Listen just because it’s never directly addressed doesn’t mean it’s a plot hole. Would you stop trying to destroy the iconic world that Rowling built? Jeeze, why did I agree to watch these with you, all you do is complain.” Minji sighs and Yoongi peers up at her to see her shaking her head disapprovingly. “Also I keep telling you that the fundamentals of the world were written with children in mind, for instance the fact that the magic world is hidden from muggles allows the possibility of a magic world being hidden from our world in real life. Plus, starting life as a muggle makes our protagonist Harry more relatable.”

Yoongi smiles up at Minji from his position on her lap and she turns her head down to scowl at him. “You know way too much about Harry Potter.” he tells her. “It's cute.” He pauses, “but it’s weird.”

“Don't call me cute; I'll fight you.” Minji says before looking up and away from Yoongi to hide her smile and subsequent tiny laugh.

“You’d lose.” Yoongi informs her.

Minji scoffs. “No I wouldn’t.” she says, “Have you seen my arms? They’re huge. I’m a tank.”

Yoongi rolls his head up, “What?” he says, “Really? Let me see.”

Minji sighs. “Pay attention to the damn movie, Yoongi, this is one of my favourite ones.”

“Okay.” Yoongi says, shifting his position again to look back to the screen. “Tell me about it, what do you like?”

“Maybe you should watch the movie first and then we'll talk about it afterwards.” Minji says.

“But it's so much more interesting when you explain it.” Yoongi pouts. “What makes these movies so iconic? What about them makes them special to you? What details about it will I miss on my first watch through?”

Minji frowns, “I didn’t sign up for this.” She says, “research it yourself if it’s that important”

Yoongi smiles to himself sluggishly “But I like it when you talk during the movies. I like listening to you. You’re such a giant nerd I never would have guessed.”

Yoongi rolls his head over to look at Minji again and smiles when he sees her playing at her bottom lip with her teeth, adamantly looking at the movie and not him, illuminated by the blue light of the screen. His stomach does a somersault and Yoongi is certain that he doesn't want to know why. Minji continues to watch the screen and not Yoongi himself. “At least if you're talking about Harry Potter then you aren't insulting me.” he jokes. Minji frowns at that and that makes Yoongi snicker. “I'm kidding.” he tells her charitably.

Minji still doesn't look down at him and so Yoongi entertains himself by trying to quantify the angle of Minji's jawline. Minji's face is all soft clouds excepting the hard edge that her jawline draws. Yoongi can kind of see up Minji's nose from the angle, he decides not to look too hard there. Instead he focuses on the other parts of her face. Her nose is short, her cheeks puffy, her lips full and pink. Minji has a nice mouth, Yoongi thinks, objectively of course. It had a smooth slope that outlined its edges, a light pink colour and soft and plush lips that were parted oh so slightly and oh sh*t.

Chapter 8: Soup Dynamics

Chapter Text

Wanting to kiss Minji is…confusing, to say the least.

Minji keeps making Yoongi's heart jump and it is beginning to be a problem. The first problem is that it’s bizarre. The second problem is that it’s inconvenient. The third problem is that it’s embarrassing and Yoongi is pretty certain that Wendy is onto him. It's just that Minji is stupidly cute, and stupidly well-meaning, and how can you not smile when a giant nerd is in the room with you making a damn fool of herself? You can't. Yoongi sure can't. Wendy can't either, but she still makes fun of him for it.

“Win the lottery, Yoongi?” Wendy snickers as Yoongi puts one of the first orders of the day under the heating lamp.

“f*ck off,” Yoongi tells her, tipping his head to the side and licking his lips to try to stop smiling.

“Everyone's talking about you two.” Wendy tells him with a knowing look and Yoongi's brain short circuits. Wendy's eyebrows are halfway up her forehead and she's got a fair amount of teeth showing, ready to hear the latest gossip, and Yoongi thinks this is the first time he's actually been involved in a kitchen scandal (second time, if you include the rivalry he and Minji had been in prior to them getting along). Of course their relationship these days is much less exciting. They mostly just…get along. Right?

Yoongi's scrunches up his nose distastefully. “Why?” he asks, ignoring the fact that his cheeks are heating up for absolutely no discernible reason.

“You guys haven't fought in months and now you won't stop flirting,” Wendy teases. “ All of us kitchen staff have whiplash.”

“We're not flirting,” Yoongi says without dignity, ears burning.

Wendy smiles knowingly, squinting her eye at Yoongi. “Last time I saw you two together, you had your hands on her waist and were whispering to her about something and she was giggling like a schoolgirl.”

Yoongi remembers that. He’s mortified. That is absolutely not what happened. “That's not what happened,” he says.

Wendy raises her eyebrows, amused. “That's exactly what happened.”

Yoongi wets his lips. “Okay maybe that's what it looked like on the outside, but to be fair I was making sure she didn't fall. And what I was actually telling her was that she was clumsy.”

Wendy doesn’t falter. “That sounds exactly like you flirting,” she claims. “Remember when you had a crush on Baekhyun?”

“Oh my god. Please don't.”

“You acted the same way around him as you do Minji. You get so awkward…and blushy, and then you try to make up for it by acting silly and using your dumbass sense of humour to amuse yourself. And you also get super soft. Gentler, like you’re made of candy and marshmallows, and then everything you say to them is like a backhanded compliment.”

This is straight slander; Yoongi can’t believe his ears. “Oh god.”

“You can't even deny it because you know it's true,” Wendy prods, laughing.

“I can and do deny that,” Yoongi counters.

“I think Minji likes you though,” Wendy says, tilting her head with a glint in her eye. “I don't know why. I mean, I thought she’d been onto something when she hated your guts, but I guess maybe she's strayed from God's light.”

“Speaking of backhanded compliments, are you flirting with me?” Yoongi asks.

Wendy grins. “Yes, is it working?”

“Absolutely,” replies Yoongi. “Now go away.”

Wendy laughs. “Ask her out,”

Instead of replying Yoongi scoffs, but even once Wendy’s turned to leave, the thought lingers in his mind.

. . .

Like the many surprises that Minji graces his life with, there's a new problem in Yoongi's life that he had absolutely not seen coming: he wants to kiss Minji. Often. And it's interrupting his daily routine consistently. He'll walk into work expecting a normal day and then two seconds later have an existential crisis because Minji wore red lipstick that day, and how is he supposed to be the best damn grill cook in the state if all he can think about is about how soft her lips must feel and the colour of her lipstick staining his own lips?

She also won't stop touching him and it's driving him up the wall, his skin constantly warm and tingly from Minji's fingers brushing against him or her arm wrapping around him. Yoongi feels like he's on edge all the time, hyper-aware of the buzz under his skin and the way that his heart’s always trying to jump out of his chest.

Minji puts her hands over Yoongi's eyes as he's busy at his grill one day, with the cliche “guess who” in a light amused tone.

“Someone who doesn't understand fire safety,” Yoongi tells her, unable to see anything except the dull red outline of Minji's fingers, and her light laughter titters from behind him. Then suddenly her hands are gone and she's walking away as if nothing had happened, and Yoongi notes that at some point during that exchange his heart has decided to relocate to his throat.

He has no idea how this has even happened. He shouldn’t like Minji this much, not after only getting along with her for a few months. He should tolerate Minji. That’s all he should feel towards her. Tolerance. But Minji is cute and familiar. Getting to talk to her is new and exciting, and Yoongi's head won't stop spinning. Being alone with her is not helping.

Yoongi is so distracted that he almost doesn't hear Minji speak to him.

“Hey, Yoongi, remember when I cooked for you and Tae?”

Yoongi looks up, blinking. “That mess?” he responds, still half on autopilot. “I’ve repressed it.”

Minji’s eyebrows crease in scandal, waking Yoongi from his stupor. “It wasn’t that bad!” she exclaims. She pushes back her bangs with the palm of her hands. “Tae liked it.”

“It was kinda bland and the flavour was weird.”

“What?!” Minji exclaims, letting her hair fall back down in front of her face. “You know what? Shush, I don’t want to hear this.”

Yoongi blinks complacently.

“Anyway, I do admit that my cooking wasn’t perfect.” She side-eyes Yoongi. “And I have family coming over soon, and I was wondering if you had any input about what I should do.”

Yoongi’s not sure he’s entirely on the same page as Minji. Maybe it’s because he only slept three hours last night. “You want me to tell you how to improve the dish you made?” he clarifies.

“Or you could tell me what I should make instead!” Minji exclaims. “Or like you could give me cooking lessons.” She kicks at the ground with her feet. “It’s just that your dishes always have this really unique touch to them.”

“You want cooking lessons.” Yoongi deadpans. “From me.”

Minji plays with the sleeves of her shirt. “Yes?”

Yoongi blinks. “Um.” He says. He can think of at least twenty people Minji could have asked instead of him, including all of the kitchen staff. Yoongi doesn’t know who else Minji has cooked for in the staff, but one of them includes Taehyung who, as the sauté cook, would know more about general dishes than Yoongi. “Okay, sure.” He doesn’t take himself by surprise by agreeing. He’s been too eager to spend time with Minji lately. But Minji is the one who asked him, and he can’t be persecuted for agreeing to do something Minji initiated.

“Oh!” Minji sounds genuinely surprised, voice lifting in relief. “Thank you so much, Yoongi!”

Yoongi raises an eyebrow in response, “You know we can’t do that here, right? In this kitchen?”

“Oh, well, yeah I figured. I’ve already been to your place.” It’s fair, really, that statement, from Minji’s perspective. But to Yoongi, he hasn’t had Minji over since also maybe wanting to kiss her and maybe that intimacy will be weird now. Yoongi’s traitorous mind lingers on the possibilities.

“Are you free when we finish up?” Yoongi asks, ignoring the way his heart is being as traitorous as his head and thanking the heavens that his voice doesn’t waver. “We could go to my place. I own all the cooking things.”

“All the things, you say?” Minji asks, smiling, leaning on a counter.

“Yes. Them all,” Yoongi confirms.

Minji shifts on the counter and opens a drawer to pick up an avocado slicer that could very well just look like an obscure tool of torture to her. “Even this?” she asks.

Yoongi laughs, “Okay, no,” he admits.

Minji gasps, “What?! Then was are we going to do with our….” She trails off to examine the device, looking for its purpose.

“Avocados,” Yoongi supplies.

Minji looks up from the slicer to glance at Yoongi. “Oh yes. What are we going to do with our avocados?”

Yoongi shrugs. “Use a knife?”

. . .

Yoongi is busy at the counter, cutting board out in front of him, knife in his hands, and a pile of vegetables ready to be cut at his left. He can hear Minji rummaging around his drawers behind him, probably causing trouble. She had tuned out of his very informative lesson about the intricacies of vegetable cutting about thirty seconds in, and now Yoongi is working alone with his back facing Minji. Occasionally she'll make comments.

“Is this a dild*?” Minji asks suddenly.

“What are you even-” Yoongi turns around to see Minji holding a strawberry stem remover in her hand, eyebrow raised and theatrical frown on her face. She looks between it and Yoongi and tsks.

“Oh my god,” Yoongi says, putting down his knife so that he can walk over and take the thing right out of her hands and put in back in the drawer. “No,” he tells her, leaning against the drawer to stop her from opening it again.

Minji eyes him suspiciously. “I think it was a dild*,” she says.

“I think it was a strawberry stem remover,” Yoongi informs her.

“A likely story.”

“Yes. It is. We're in my kitchen. My mom gave me that as an apartment warming gift actually.”

“Your mom gave you a dild*?”

Yoongi can't hold back a snort as Minji snickers. “That thing is so tiny, why would you even-” he says, tipping his head down to hide the fact that she had made him smile. He shakes his head disapprovingly. “Will you stop going through my things? Can we get back to the lesson now?”

Minji pouts. “But I already know how to cut vegetables,” she whines.

“Then you do it.”

“But you're the expert.”

“And you're my student. Come on, then. Show me what you got.”

Minji sighs but heads over to the cutting board that Yoongi’s set up all nicely. She takes the knife artlessly and Yoongi already cringes and the way her fingers grip at the handle. He watches as she takes the half onion that he had left and puts it on the cutting board. The first thing she does is cut off the stem that Yoongi had strategically not done earlier. He squawks and puts his hands over Minji's stilling her.

“Why would you cut off the end? That's what holds the onion together!” he exclaims.

Minji looks down at the ruins in front of her like she was looking at them for the first time. “Oh.”

“What were you even going to do next?” Yoongi asks, looking at the mess, taking his hands off Minji's so that she can demonstrate.

Minji doesn't even change the position of the onion, she just making a series of cuts down it. She’s not even making crisp clean cuts as she wiggles the knife through the onion. Something in Yoongi dies a little.

“Why do you do this to yourself?” Yoongi asks forlornly. “You're making this way harder than it has to be. How are you going to keep the onion from falling apart while you cut it?” Affirmative to his words, the parts of the onion that have been cut begin to slide around as Minji turns the onion to cut it into dices. She clumsily tries to keep the onion contained in her hands as she makes her irregular cuts.

“Sorry I have better things to do all day other than practice cutting onions,” Minji grumbles. “I get the job done so shut up about it.”

“But you're making it so much harder.”

“Well maybe I can handle extra work.”

“But that's so unnecessary,” Yoongi whines.

Minji finishes dicing the onion and looks at it, satisfied. “You do the rest yourself if it bothers you that much.”

“I'm supposed to be teaching you.”

“I wanna learn cool stuff. Not how to be pretentious and cut onions 'the right way.'”

Yoongi groans, “It's not pretentious, it's practical. Come on, cut the pepper next, I have to see this.”

Yoongi leans over Minjito get the pepper and put it on the cutting board for her. She sighs but picks up the chef’s knife again, turning it around in her hands.

“Can I get a smaller knife at least?” she asks. “At my house we used steak knifes for everything.”

“What?!” Yoongi exclaims. “No!” Using a steak knife for everything. The horror. “Just cut the pepper.”

Minji begins to turn around the pepper, setting her knife on the edge of it, ready to cut it in half. Yoongi is cringing already. Minji sighs. “I can't do this with you leering over my shoulder and judging me. I feel like if I make one wrong move you'll kick me out.”

“I'm not going to kick you out, but you’re already doing something I wouldn't do.”

“Can you at least show me what to do?”

“This recipe only requires one pepper.”

Minji groans.

“Okay, well, what I like to do is-” he picks the pepper up and places it upright with Minji’s left hand balancing it. He awkwardly places his hand around Minji’s grip on the knife to slice the pepper, trying to make a smooth cut down its length. The knife slips, the pepper shakes, he fails. He shifts his position and tries again. And fails again. The knife gets no hold on the pepper and maybe Minji’s hands are unsteady holding the pepper in place. He moves behind her so that he can get a grip on Minji’s other hand to hold the pepper steady only belatedly realizing that he is now straight up spooning her from behind like in a goddamn movie. Smooth, Yoongi. Minji stiffens. Yoongi’s ears are burning. Get a damn hold of yourself, man, you are a professional cook.

His one hand he keeps on the other side, reaching around her to put the pepper on its head. He moves the knife, along with Minji's hand to the end of the bell pepper. “What I do, is I cut down the pepper like this,” he says, pushing the knife down in one smooth motion, demonstrating with Minji's hands. “Around the seeds in the middle.”

Minji takes less than a second to respond. “What the hell?Who does that?”

“Gordon Ramsay, for one,” Yoongi says, turning the pepper so that he can make his next slice.

Minji's fingers flex under Yoongi's but she lets Yoongi lead her hands complacently. “You watch Gordon Ramsay?”

Yoongi breathes a laugh from somewhere near Minji's ear “Where do you think I learned all my cooking skills? Culinary school?”

Minji laughs. “Yeah,” she tells him. “I assumed so.”

Yoongi's hands still on the knife as he smiles. “It might have been that too,” he says before letting his hands fall from Minji's as he backs off. “Now you try, without my help.” Minji sighs but obediently makes the next cut in the pepper with shaking hands. It goes relatively smoothly and Yoongi is a proud tutor.

Minji even takes initiative for herself and cuts the last bit of the seeds off the pepper. “Tricky,” she says sarcastically.

“You're a natural.” Yoongi says, grinning.

Minji pushes all the pieces from the pepper into the corner of the cutting board, but Yoongi doesn't miss the tiny smile that she tries to hide from him as he looks down. “You could have just told me how to do that without going all pottery scene from ghost on me, you know.”

Yoongi’s face is hot, but hopefully not red, as he tries to keep it cool. “I mean I saw how you cut that onion.” He says, “I wasn't willing to take any chances.”

“Yeah, okay.” Minji says. “Anyway. Do you want me to dice this pepper then or are you going to hug me from behind again?”

Yoongi grins in response, contrasting with the way his heart is beating a mile a minute. “Depends on how bad you are at dicing.”

Minji purses her lips to try to hide her smile again, her cheeks tinted red. She turns away from Yoongi to the cutting board in front of her, taking the knife back in her hand and laying a piece of pepper in front of her. Yoongi leans his hip on the counter, watching her hands as Minji fumbles around for a bit.

He begins singing Unchained Melodies from Ghost. “Oh, my love, my darling~” he starts, teasing her.

Minji threatens him with the knife.

. . .

Minji won't let Yoongi live down how he helped her cut peppers. She's got the bowl of vegetables tipped over the pot on the stove, face turned to look at Yoongi with exaggerated confusion written on her face.

“Yes, just put the vegetables in the soup stock,” Yoongi says patiently.

Minji sticks out her bottom lip. “Are you sure I'm able to do this myself? I'm such an amateur I have no idea how to pour vegetables in soup. Maybe you should help me pour them in to make sure I don't spill the soup everywhere.”

Yoongi levels her with an unamused look. “Don’t test me. Maybe I do have a superior way to pour vegetables in soup. You don’t know.”

“Oh my!” Minji exclaims. “Please help me, there’s no way I’ve been doing this right!” she says with an inflection in her tone contrary to her words, she looks wide eyed at Yoongi.

Yoongi laughs. “I said don’t test me,” he says as he slides in behind Minji. To her credit, she seems to be vaugely caught off guard by it, immediately looking intently at the soup and screwing up her face in embarrassment as Yoongi take her hands in his. “Oh, my love, my darling,” Yoongi sings, grinning from ear to ear. He uses the spoon to push the vegetables into the pot. He hopes Minji takes it as a joke, it doesn’t mean anything. It’s kind of silly how easily Yoongi had flustered her.

Still, Yoongi backs off her as quickly as he’d sidled in. “Sorry,” he says, still smiling.

“Wow,” Minji says. “I can't believe I was pouring vegetables into soup wrong this whole time.”

. . .

“And now you basically just stir it,” Yoongi says, looking down at the boiling half-soup.

“Stir it!?” Minji exclaims theatrically. “I'm not sure I know how to do that; can you show me?”

“Oh, my love, my darling~”

This time Minji laughs when he sidles in close.

It’s fun. It’s a joke. It’s okay. It doesn’t mean anything, and neither does the way Yoongi’s heart races.

. . .

Yoongi has never been a man with much energy to spare. Work isn't always painful but it has often been stressful and thankless, and Yoongi's only consolation to coming home exhausted was that at least his coworkers are on the same page. Some days it's harder than others to get up for work, but he always manages to do it, and once there it usually isn't so terrible, despite the rush hour scrambles and the sporadic customer complaints. Yoongi does not hate his job; in fact he mostly appreciates it, but sometimes it just exhausts him.

However, recently Yoongi can't seem to stop smiling at work. He keeps randomly remembering things about Minji and smiling. He's weirding himself out and possibly others.

The smile comes back when he hears a familiar tune sung from behind him.

“Oh, my love, my darling~”

A warm body presses up against Yoongi's back and fingers trail down his wrists to lie loosely around his hands. Yoongi's face hurts from straight up just grinning like an idiot at his grill as he prods at the things cooking, while Minji hums in his ears, half singing half giggling. Minji's hands skate up at down Yoongi's arms as she giggles. She hugs her arms around Yoongi and moves her hands to stroke at Yoongi's face, rubbing her hands all over his cheeks and prodding at his jaw. When she sticks her finger up his nose, Yoongi takes that as his cue to speak.

“Why do you have to bother me while I'm working?” Yoongi half-whispers, nose crinkled, still looking down at the grill before him.

“You looked like you didn't know how to grill properly and I thought that the best way to teach you was by assaulting you from behind,” she tells him simply.

Yoongi snorts and turns his head so that he can kinda see Minji, and she leans off him to look at him. He's about to say something but someone catches his eye. He thinks he senses someone staring at him, and notices the vague shape of a figure in the corner of his vision. His eyes flicker to focus on the shape. It's Jungkook and he's staring at the two of them in abject horror.

. . .

Jungkook is only nineteen years old, has a steady job as a waiter to try to pay for college, and still lives in his parent's house, and Yoongi is more proud of him than he could ever be of himself. Jungkook doesn't even have to do anything spectacular anymore to get Yoongi to feel a tremendous amount of pride well up in his chest. Just the other day Jungkook had snapchatted Yoongi a picture of his drink with a terrible pun that had made Yoongi snort, but no one can prove that.

Sitting in Jungkook's room is like second nature to Yoongi. Even as he plays on his phone at the edge of Jungkook's bed he felt a small amount of pride just for the fact that Jungkook takes up space. Being around Jungkook feels as innate as breathing at this point; he didn't do it for any other reason other than that Jungkook was a part of his life and Yoongi liked being around him. Even just in the silence of Jungkook's childhood bedroom as the fading sunlight played on the fading surface of Jungkook's wallpaper.

“Hey,” Jungkook says, and Yoongi lifts his head from his phone to twist his entire body to look at Jungkook. Jungkook sucks in his bottom lip and rolls it under his teeth. “Okay, this isn't really my business, but what's going on between you and Minji?”

Yoongi raises an eyebrow and looks back to his phone temporarily, to scroll inactively through his open twitter feed. Jungkook rarely brings up things that don't involve him, in fact he rarely even brings up things that involve him either. “Minji?” Yoongi asks, looking down at his phone. To be honest with himself Yoongi has no idea what is going on with Minji. She makes his stomach do weird flips and he enjoys teasing her, but the whole situation feels very untraversed to him. “Um.”

Jungkook is quiet from behind him, gingerly waiting for Yoongi to fill the silence. Yoongi can hear him tapping away on his phone. He turns around to look at Jungkook once again. “Minji,” he says again thoughtfully, tongue in cheek. “I guess we’re friends?”

Jungkook's forehead wrinkles as he blinks incredulously at Yoongi. “Do you actually not know?”

Yoongi blinks back. “Maybe?” he asks. “I don't know. I don't know what's going on with Minji. Whatever it is it's good though, I think it's good.” Jungkook doesn’t look up from his phone, saying nothing. Yoongi plays at his bottom lip with his teeth. “Is it good?” he asks.

Jungkook stares at Yoongi blankly. “You’re seriously asking me?” he says.

Yoongi hums in response, going back to his phone.

“That scene in the kitchen...” Jungkook starts, looking down as his phone far too innocently to be casual. “The other day.”

It clicks for Yoongi. So this is what Jungkook was on about. “Ah.”

“Yeah,” Jungkook’s still looking at his phone, stalling. “did that, er, mean something?”

Yoongi exhales slowly. He has no god damned clue what that meant. “I uh, I don't know,” Yoongi says honestly.

Jungkook nods slowly, playing with his cheeks using air pockets in his mouth. He tips his head sideways as he looks across the room. “Do you-” he stops. “Like her?

The scene with Minji had probably looked really intimate from an outsider’s perspective, hell, it had felt intimate. But it also felt private, and like it was a silly inside joke that only he and Minji could understand, because they understood their relationship best. Yoongi's instinct tells him to avoid answering that question like the plague, but he trusts Jungkook and Jungkook was asking him these questions for a reason. The truth is that Yoongi really does like Minji, and it becomes less hard everyday to admit that. “I think so.”

“Oh.” Jungkook bites his lip and looks thoughtfully at the bed. Yoongi wonders what's going through the kid’s head. “You should be careful,” Jungkook says slowly, like he's considering every word he says, “with that.”

Yoongi squints, mostly to himself because Jungkook is only sending brief glances in his direction and otherwise looking uncomfortably around the room. Jungkook is as terrible at confronting problems as Yoongi is. Yoongi is weirdly proud of him for at least trying. “Careful.” Yoongi repeats, prodding Jungkook to explain.

“Yeah.” Jungkook says, eyes searching his lap for something else to add. Yoongi waits. “I don't know if you and Minji dating is a good idea.”

Yoongi almost laughs. “Well, we're hardly close to that.”

“That's probably good.” Jungkook says enigmatically, which just kind of confuses Yoongi. “I mean I'm glad that you are friends, I just” he pauses and looks at the ceiling “I think you should be careful around Minji.”

Yoongi almost laughs. “God. Kid, you are cryptic.”

Jungkook smiles a tiny smile. “Yeah, I just-” he starts, and then tries again, “Minji is just-” another pause, “And you-” Jungkook sighs frustrated.

Jungkook seems to be searching for words. Yoongi's lips twitch as an embarrassed smile is hinted behind his lips. “Are you worried about me?” Yoongi asks. Why would Jungkook be worried about him? He can handle himself.

Jungkookpouts. “No.

Yoongi laughs nervously. “Okay.” Jungkook pouts in response, his frown deepening, and Yoongi mirrors it. “There’s no need to be worried about me.”

Jungkook makes a face. “Just be careful around Minji. I don't even know what's going on in her head anymore.”

“I never know what's going on in her head,” Yoongi admits.

Jungkook blows air out of his mouth. “Maybe you should ask her,” he suggests.

“Ask her what's going on in her head?”

Jungkook looks back down at Yoongi. “Ask her what she thinks of you. Ask what she thinks of your relationship. Maybe there's something she hasn't told you.”

Yoongi blinks. “Like what?”

Jungkook sighs dramatically, lolling his head back behind him. “That she's an avenger?” he says. “I don't know. Ask her yourself.”

. . .

Everyone keeps calling Yoongi out on his crush on Minji. First Wendy, then Jungkook, and now in the same day Hoseok, Namjoon, and Soekjin have all tried to have serious talks with him about it. It’s terrible. Why can’t they just let him live and have stupid negligible crushes on his former enemies? Of course, the way Wendy approached it made him think that maybe it doesn’t have to be negligible.

“I think it’s cute,” she says as she wipes down the bar. “You two. You’re so awkward around each other like you’re walking on eggshells but I always see you two together, bantering. I can tell you really like each other, and you both feel bad about what happened. It’s cute.”

Yoongi doesn’t think it’s cute. It makes his head spin. Some days Minji is all smiles and laughs, and on the same page as Yoongi, leveling him with jokes and leaning on him when she laughs. But other days she’s closed off, quiet. When Yoongi tries to talk to her on those days he can tell her smile is more hesitant, and more forced. Her friendliness never fails, but how genuine she feels has. Some days Yoongi might almost agree with Wendy that Minji likes him, but other days he takes it too far by maybe trying to hold he hand and she gets Very Closed Off for the next several days.

She first started going quiet around him after the Jungkook incident, and since then has been a reoccurring phenomenon. Yoongi doesn’t get it. He doesn’t get Minji.

He should straight up ask her how she feels about him, but there are ways that could go horribly and maybe that’s not a risk Yoongi is willing to take. Being friends with Minji is already miracle, hell, even her tolerating him is a miracle. Maybe Yoongi should just shut his damn mouth.

But maybe Yoongi wants to risk it. Maybe he wants to try awkward dates with Minji. Maybe he wants to try kissing her. Maybe he doesn’t want to feel bad and dirty over having a measly crush on a co-worker. Minji had told him that she had been wrong about him, she had been very adamant that she doesn’t hate him and maybe even likes him, God knows why. Maybe Yoongi just wants closure because God, does he feel anxious in this in state.

No harm in asking? No harm, no foul?

“Hey Minji,” Yoongi starts, his voice a little too high strung for his tastes.

Minji doesn't look up from the boxes as she unpacks them into the walk in fridge. “Yeah?” she replies easily.

Yoongi looks down at his own box. He’d f*cked up. This was as far as he had planned, he doesn’t even remember deciding to speak. What the hell is he supposed to say? ‘I know you hated me once but now that things have developed do you want to try making out instead? With me?’ He has to say something now that he'd gone and queued himself up for it. “Do you like me?” Yoongi asks, pitiful in his attempts to be smooth.

“Er,” says Minji, looking away from the shelves to look at Yoongi. “What?” she says, her breath comes out smoke from the frigid air.

Yoongi frowns, rubbing his arm half to keep warm and half because he may or may not be nervous god help him. “I mean it was a pretty straightforward question.”

Minji immediately responds, “It was a pretty weird question.”

Yoongi frowns down at the boxes that brush his knees as he crouches down in front of the shelf. “Fair.” he admits, stalling. “What I meant-” he says as he pushes himself up to face Minji and lean on the shelf, “was that since we’ve been friends, I’ve grown to appreciate your company and your quirks, far beyond what I could have ever imagined.” Minji straightens up, uncurling her back to stand up straight and look Yoongi in the eye, apparently the topic of the conversation was enough to warrant her full attention. “I’ve grown to really like you and-“

Yoongi stops when he sees the expression on her face. Soft, caught off-guard, and mildly terrified.

“Um,” says Yoongi. “Do you- uh.”

Minji’s shoulders droop, “Of course I like you Yoongi- listen I - I do.”

Yoongi cringes at himself, he should drop it, logically. “Not like that.” He says instead ambiguously.

Minji’s brows crease and he face falls. “Oh.” She says, she struggles for words as Yoongi feels his spirits dropping at an alarming rate. “Um.” Yoongi doesn’t say anything, the silence in the room more suffocating him than inviting him to fill it. Minji bites her lip, frowning at Yoongi. Silent. “I don’t know what to say,” she confesses eventually.

“You could just answer the question,” Yoongi suggests hopefully, tucking his fingers into his palms maybe because the cold fridge air is getting to his extremities, or otherwise maybe it’s his only hold on reality and he needs the contact comfort.

“I don’t think I should.” Minji says, and Yoongi doesn’t reply. Minji sighs, “Well, uh, I-” she stops, and starts again, “Whether I like you, in that way, um, is not important. I do like you. A lot. But that isn’t something you need to hear. You’re super incredible, and I’d be lucky to have something special with you, anyone would, but that’s all I want you to know. You don’t have to be concerned with the extent to which I like you.”

Yoongi is not following. He takes a step forward. “But since I like you so much, I think it’s relevant to my interests.”

Minji hides her head in her hands. “This isn’t happening.” She mumbles, “Yoongi, I don’t think this is a good idea.”

Yoongi smiles nervously, stepping forward trying to calm his nerves. “Why isn’t it a good idea?”

Minji’s shoulders shake as she lets out a small laugh. “It’s just not. Trust me.”

“Do you want me to shut up about this?”

“I never want you to shut up, Yoongi,” Minji says, eyebrows creased. “This just isn’t going to end well, there are things you don’t know and-”

Yoongi goes for the tried and true method of making a situation palpably less awkward. The pun approach™. “Are you getting cold feet?” he asks, taking another step forward.

Minji lets out a surprised laugh. “Oh my god, Yoongi.”

“Chills?”

MInji scoffs a laugh as Yoongi draws closer, “Yoongi-“

“Do you think my jokes are nice?”

MInji knocks her head lightly against the rack as she laughs. “Yoongi!” she giggles. “Stop! This is serious!”

Yoongi points to the container of mussels near Minji, “Your muscles seem a little frigid.” He points to the chicken beside him. “Do you need a meatsage?”

Minji hides her head in her hands. “I can’t believe this. These puns are so bad.”

“Are you trying to say that my puns are on thin ice? That they’re Abominable? Atrocice?”

Minji pulls her head up from her hands to look at Yoongi in pain, shoulders shaking.

“Puns are my way of letting you know that I really”-Yoongi points at a fish-“pike you.”

Minji’s head falls to the side, shoulders drooping and her fingers curling at her chin. “Oh no, Yoongi-“

“And maybe want to cuttle fish you.”

Minji puts her hands in front of her eyes, laughing, her palms against her cheeks and her fingertips pressing lightly against her forehead. Yoongi takes her wrists gently and pulls at them gently, cueing Minji to let them fall and rest on Yoongi's chest. She lets out a small surprised laugh and looks at Yoongi with red cheeks and an embarrassed smile tugging at the corners of her mouth.

Yoongi is around the same height as Minji, and he finds himself at around eye level to her, grinning. “I don’t think we have dates in here, but maybe you can give me one?” He teases. Minji isn't shoving him off which is a good sign, but it also doesn’t mean he’s still in okay territory.

“Yoongi,” comes Minji's weak response, biting her lip to stop the smile that plays there. Yoongi finds himself staring at that smile. Minji's eyes flicker down and back up as her laughter quiets, her wide smile never leaving her face but a look of quiet curiosity emanates from her expression as it softens. She takes her wrists away from her chest, letting them fall to her sides, inadvertently bringing Yoongi's hands with them and making Yoongi reflexively step closer. They're close now, so close. Yoongi can feel the stuttering breaths of Minji's dying laughter play patterns on the skin of his lips and he can track the movement of her widening eyelids. A soft expression plays at her face; curious but guarded. Her eyes flicker around Yoongi's face; watchful.

"Is this okay?" Yoongi asks gently and Minji's breathing shallows; the smile dissolves from her face. Yoongi adjusts his hands so that they lay more comfortably on Minji's wrist, letting them slide down until his fingers find her hands. He doesn't miss her quiet intake of breath or the curious way she blinks her eyes at him.

She wets her lips nervously. "Um."

Fire runs through Yoongi's veins and his heart thumps loudly in his ears. He looks down at Minji's lips. Minji’s breath hitches. “Can I kiss you?” Yoongi asks.

Minji's eyes flicker downwards and at first Yoongi thinks that she's looking at his mouth but he realizes that instead she's just looking down and away from him. “No.” she says quietly.

Yoongi had genuinely not expected that. Okay holy sh*t apparently he’s actually f*cking up pretty bad. "Oh." Yoongi says, beginning to back off. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry."

Minji's hands tighten around Yoongi's fingers, holding him in place. “No, Yoongi-” she starts, looking into Yoongi's eyes. “I’m sorry.” she stammers “I-it's not that I don't want you to,” she says. “I just don't think that this is a good idea.” Maybe she’s just trying to let him off easy? He starts to pull back again but Minji holds fast to his hands, searching his eyes for understanding.

Yoongi frowns, “What do you have to be sorry for? If you don't like me, it’s okay.” his throat aches and his heart is currently trying to take evasive action to leave his sorry ass by sinking into the floor, but it’s not Minji’s fault.

MInji winces, “Yoongi, I-” she stops to look at the ground frustrated. “Christ, I've dug myself into a f*cking crater here,” she mutters under her breath Yoongi blinks and Minji turns back up to face him. “Honest to god, I want this, I'm so sorry that I haven't been clear, I just don’t know what to tell you. I’ve messed up a lot and I don’t know what to do, Yoongi, this is all my fault, I’m so sorry.”

Yoongi lets out a laugh, Minji’s hands still clutching tightly to his, “It’s okay.”.

“No, it’s not,” says Minji, her hands shaking.

“It’s okay that you don’t want to kiss me,” Yoongi says, squeezing Minji’s hands.

Minji closes her eyes and exhales. “That’s not what I’m apologizing for.”

Yoongi considers the girl in front of him carefully. She doesn't seem to be repelled by him, but she also seems to be hiding a lot more than Yoongi anticipated. "Do you want me to back off?" he asks her carefully.

Minji breathes out slowly, closing her eyes. "That would be best."

Yoongi hums and takes a step back. Minji lets out the breath she’d been holding.

“Sorry,” Yoongi apologizes again.

“You didn’t do anything wrong,” says Minji. “I’m sorry.”

Yoongi goes back to unpacking boxes. Minji doesn’t move. Just stares. Eventually she says something that comes out more of a whisper than a confession. “I think I'm falling for you,” Minji says in such a small quiet voice that she may as well just be taking to herself.

Yoongi's heart, which is on the floor and dragging behind him suddenly jumps back into his chest and starts running a marathon “Oh.” Yoongi says stupidly.

“Yeah,” says Minji.

“But I can't kiss you,” he clarifies.

“No.”

Yoongi doesn’t get it. “Okay,” he says. He backtracks, scratching at his wrist self-consciously, “Do you want to get back to work?”

“Yes. Yeah.” Minji says, eyes falling away from Yoongi. “I'm sorry, Yoongi.”

Yoongi shakes his head. “It's not your fault.” If anyone, he thinks he should be the one apologizing.

Minji mumbles softly something under her breath that Yoongi can barely make out but he thinks she says, “I think everything might be my fault.”

Chapter 9: That Feel When You Unknowingly Try to Kiss Your Worst Enemy

Chapter Text

“I tried to kiss Minji.” Yoongi confesses to Jungkook one day, in the bathroom at the restaurant before opening as Jungkook washes his hands. Jungkook turns his head from the water running over his palms to look wide-eyed at Yoongi

“Oh no.” Jungkook says.

“I guess you can predict how it went,” Yoongi states flatly, judging by Jungkook’s tone. He lets his shoulders rise and fall as he takes a breath. “I probably should’ve.”

“Did you?” Jungkook asks, the same look still frozen on his face.

“Did I what?” Yoongi asks confused, “Predict that?”

Jungkook shakes his head, blinking, “No, uh, did you kiss her?”

“No.” Yoongi looks at the faucet rather than Jungkook. “No, she said not to.”

“Oh. I’m uh, sorry.” Jungkook fills the silence awkwardly. Yoongi shrugs.

Jungkook turns off the tap, but doesn’t leave the sink as he turns to Yoongi. “What did she say exactly?”

“That I didn’t want to kiss her or something.” Yoongi reports with zero comprehension, “It was weird, I don’t know.”

Jungkook lets out a curt snort that Yoongi frowns at. He catches Jungkook’s eye in the mirror before them and Jungkook sobers. “Sorry.” He says.

“I don’t know if it was some weird rejection, or what.” Yoongi elaborates.

“Yeah.” Jungkook says, eyeing Yoongi’s reflection in the mirror “I don’t know. Maybe something like that.”

. . .

I tried to kiss Minji.” Yoongi confesses to Hoseok who is sprawled out on the ground in the dance studio, hair clinging to his forehead with sweat, chest heaving.

Hoseok doesn’t roll his head over to look at Yoongi. He stares at the ceiling, still breathing heavily. “Oh.”

Yoongi frowns. “You don’t seem surprised.”

Hoseok blinks at the ceiling, breathing in and out, and then eventually “I could guess that you liked her.” he says, the back of his head still resting on the floor. There’s a pause where Yoongi isn’t certain whether he’s supposed to respond. Eventually, Hoseok says from the floor, “How did it go?”

Yoongi purses his lips. “Not well.” He responds conservatively.

“Ah.” Says Hoseok. “That’s too bad.” He doesn’t sound like he means it. He pauses, breathing steady as his chest heaves. “How do you feel about it?”

Yoongi considers. He feels absolutely awful about everything in every way, and every day feels like he’s wading through solid guilt “Not great.” He admits.

Hoseok exhales slowly as if deep in thought, then turns his eyes on Yoongi. “You wanna talk about it?

Yoongi finds himself shaking his head before even thinking about responding. “No.”

Hoseok hums, rolling his head up to blink at the ceiling. “Okay,” he says, “Maybe another time.” A pause. “Do you want to get something to eat?”

. . .

Wendy and Namjoon text Yoongi condolences. Namjoon sends him a paragraph asking him if he’s okay and Wendy sends him one sentence ‘heard what happened w minji, u cool?’. Seokjin brings him some pastries from his bakery, and Yoongi thinks that Taehyung tries to bring it up but it ends very awkwardly and Yoongi isn’t entirely sure what Taehyung was trying to achieve. But in general, no one else brings it up. The staff at the restaurant treat him the same. They know, and they must notice how awkward Yoongi acts around Minji now, but no one says anything.

“She obviously really likes you,” Wendy reassures him, “I don’t know why she would do this.”

“Yeah,” Yoongi says noncommittedly, “I don’t know.”

. . .

For the most part, rejection is not an easy thing to deal with. It’s not really Minji’s fault that her rejecting his advances sends him into a spiraling pit of self-hatred but it is what it is. It’s not really Minji’s fault that Yoongi has to deal with a sudden influx of the realization that he is is a burden more than anything else. It’s not her fault that he had mistaken her kindness for interest when he’d told himself a million f*cking times that he is not worthy of anyone’s damn attention.

Minji had been too generous to Yoongi even after initially hating him and Yoongi had fallen for it like some desperate, pitiful sponge for affection and approval. Or rather, like a damn fool. Minji had been right about him the first day she walked into the restaurant, and Yoongi feels like sh*t for maybe believing for a little while that he had convinced her otherwise. He should have known better. He does know better. He knows damn well that he is garbage and he is irresponsible for even having glimpsed himself as anything other than a damn burden on anyone else.

Parasite. Poison. That’s what Minji had called him. He had tried to kiss someone that had called him exactly what he is. What the f*ck is wrong with him. Who does that? Someone desperate, probably.

He is always screwing up like this. Always forgetting himself, forgetting that sometimes letting his damn mouth run is something nobody wants. And worst of all of it, now he feels sh*tty and there’s nothing he can do about it, because the only thing he’s really good at is wallowing. And also, maybe writing songs about wallowing, but to be fair he’s probably not even good at doing that.

Really, she had let him down easy. She had done everything in her power to not hurt Yoongi anymore than she had before and even that hurts. Because Yoongi is also ruining that by being stupidly angsty about one little rejection and now Minji won’t even look him in the eye anymore. Or maybe he won’t look Minji in the eye anymore. In any case, no eye contact is made and it makes Yoongi feel like sh*t.

On top of all dilemmas with Minji, Yoongi is not expecting to see Jimin again so soon after last having seen him.

Yoongi hadn't anticipated seeing Jimin when he left the house this morning. When Hoseok had convinced him to go out on his day off; he thought the worst thing would be that he would spill coffee on himself. Not spill feelings on himself. He hadn't anticipated going to the same coffee shop as Jimin and Taehyung at somehow almost exactly the same time. It would have been fine really; Yoongi is an expert at pretending that he doesn’t see Jimin, except that Hoseok for some god damn reason calls Jimin and Taehyung over.

It’s inconsistent. For the last few years, Hoseok had been just leaving them be. But apparently, something has shifted and Hoseok hates Yoongi now. Also, the universe. The universe hates Yoongi too. But that’s not new. Yoongi bemoans (quietly to himself) having to deal with Jimin while Yoongi is already feeling petulant about Minji. Nobody likes feeling petulant. But Yoongi really only has so much energy to spare on pleasantries with a long-declared enemy, you know.

Yoongi puts his head on the table, half in distress and half out of a last-ditch effort to avoid Jimin. He has dyed his hair a mint colour since the last time he saw Jimin, so maybe Jimin will not know it is him. Hoseok probably has other friends with mint green hair right? No… perhaps not. But what are the chances people gossip about Yoongi’s hair choice colours?? Low? Low.

“Hoseok?” Comes Taehyung's voice, muffled by Yoongi's arms. “What are you doing here?” His tone is so theatrical that Yoongi catches on immediately, albeit mournfully. He’s been tricked into this. That’s what he gets for trying to be the bigger person by not revealing to Jimin’s friends how sh*tty he is. That’s what he gets for trying to allow Jimin to move past his mistakes five years ago. Cool cool.

Yoongi has half a mind to disclose to them the exact reason. But it had been …five years and all.

“I managed to drag Yoongi out into the daylight for once for some coffee,” Hoseok says, blowing Yoongi's haphazard cover, not that it had had much potential as a cover in the first place. Jimin knows exactly who is petulantly hiding their face on a table, pretending to either have a hangover or be asleep? Yoongi doesn’t know what he’s trying to do at this point by having his head pressed into his arm on the table. He should probably be glaring right now. But for some reason, it feels better to be curled in on himself with the wood of the table on his forehead. It just feels right.

Hoseok continues, grin audible in his voice. “What are you doing here?”

“Just felt like grabbing a coffee, right Jimin?” Taehyung chirps.

For a moment, there's silence, just the quiet chatter of the other customers in the cafe. Then Jimin quietly speaks, “Uh, yes.” he says simply.

Yoongi really does not want to be where he is in that moment. Jimin definitely knows that it is him with his head on the table, and he definitely knows it is a pathetic attempt to avoid him at all costs. The thought doesn’t make Yoongi want to pick his head up. It makes him want to burrow further into his arms and disappear from this plane of existence

Yoongi needs an escape plan. As it is, he figures he can just leave the coffee shop. Nothing is tying him here, he could go wherever he wants in town. He doesn't really know where he would go, but it's really getting under Yoongi's skin how much he just doesn't want to be there and every second he spends planning is like an itch under his skin.

And so, with one final resolution, Yoongi pushes himself up out of his seat with plans to evacuate the building in a calm and orderly fashion. He doesn't even have plans to punch Hoseok in the face. He is truly a commendable citizen.

It surprises Yoongi who it is who calls to him, giving him pause after only having risen from his chair.

Jimin, who has been weirdly silent, speaks up the moment that Yoongi stands. “Yoongi.” Comes his quiet voice, softer than a whisper. As much as it surprises Yoongi and gives him pause, it also doubles his desire to get out of Jimin's vicinity.

Jimin calls after him and the way he's acting, all soft and pleading. is kind of messing with Yoongi's head. He says Yoongi’s name almost broken and Yoongi needs to hightail it the heck out of there before he turns around. Yoongi has always been weak. He really tries not to be. He hates himself when he acts this childishly. Yoongi isn’t sure how exactly he is supposed to respond to this situation, and that coupled with the sick feeling in his stomach spells disaster on all fronts.

He's about five steps out of the building and down the sidewalk to go who knows where when Jimin catches his arm to make him stop.

Yoongi breathes out slowly before turning around to see Jimin up close for the first time in five years. He definitely looks older and he still definitely looks like Jimin, except now Yoongi thinks that he also looks a bit like Minji.

“I need to talk to you.” Jimin says in a small voice.

“About what?” Yoongi asks exasperatedly. He doesn’t mean to sound impatient, but Yoongi’s hands are shaking for some reason, and his throat is kinda aching, his eyes are burning and seriously what the hell is going on. Calm the hell down Yoongi, Jesus Christ get it together, now is not the time for a mental breakdown.

“I -uh.” is all Jimin manages to get out and Yoongi feels all his remaining energy being drained out of him as he has to watch Jimin struggle for words. He should try to be strong. He is trying.

“I never-” Jimin starts again, and then breaks off into silence.

“You never what, Jimin?” Yoongi asks, tone harsher than he’d intended. Should he even be listening to Jimin? Does Jimin have the right to ask that of him? Should seeing Jimin looking soft and breakable before him make him feel just as breakable? Should he still care about Jimin? Do people as sh*tty as him get to have standards? Yoongi can’t tell anymore. He’s so god damn weak that he can’t even tell his best efforts apart from anything else.

Jimin looks at his shoes biting his lip, and then back up at Yoongi. “I miss you.” he says softly.

Yoongi clenches his jaw. Jimin has no right to make him feel guilty and yet here he is, looking so small like this is somehow all Yoongi's fault. Maybe Yoongi misses Jimin too. Maybe he thinks that he had been continually been screwing up over the past five years with Jimin. Maybe Yoongi is emotionally exhausted. But maybe there is nothing Yoongi can do about that.

“I've moved on.” Yoongi says. He doesn’t want to restart a friendship with Jimin. He doesn’t want to look at Jimin. He just wants to live his petulant life in peace. Should he still be angry at Jimin after five years? Jimin didn’t seem to think so. Yoongi adds, “So should you.”

Jimin exhales. “Can’t you just give me another chance? I have something I need to talk to you about.”

Yoongi knows that he shouldn’t run. That his problems should be dealt with head on, and he should finally talk to Jimin earnestly for both their resolution. But Yoongi is weak. By god is he weak. And Yoongi can't even bring himself to look Jimin in the eye.

Yoongi only feels tired. “I can’t.”

“Yoongi, I-” says Jimin. “I just-” a pause, “I never-”. He closes his mouth and his eyes and breathes in slowly. “I'm sorry.” he says. “I-”

Yoongi cuts him off. “Jimin.” he says, voice laden and weary. It’s clear that having hurt Yoongi like he had has been wracking him with guilt ever since he had done it. Maybe he’d tried to change. Maybe he wants to make amends. But Yoongi can’t give him that. Not with the way the bile builds in his throat and the way his stomach turns itself in knots when he sees Jimin. “Please leave it alone. Move on.” It is the closest thing Yoongi can give Jimin to forgiveness. The closest he can give to an apology. The whole thing still makes his head hurt and his stomach swim and Yoongi just wants to let it all go.

He misses Jimin. In some small way. The Jimin Yoongi knew and loved is still there, still trying to reach out to Yoongi and that hurts. Yoongi can't deal with missing Jimin, nor does he ever want to. Jimin looks so fragile and small and Yoongi doesn't know how to handle that. “I'm sorry.” Jimin says again.

“Me too.” Yoongi says, and he hopes to god that’s the end of it as he walks away down the street, breath shaking.

. . .

Minji has started acting strangely around Yoongi; quieter and more closed off. Yoongi begins to wonder if he had completely screwed up their relationship. She responds in fewer words, smiles more at the ground than at Yoongi, only half hearts conversations. Yoongi feels really bad, but tries to power through it. It’s all he can do really. It’s harder to get up and go to work in the morning, but Yoongi still does. It’s fine; he’s just being dramatic.

It comes as a relief when she interrupts her own mysterious silence to ask Yoongi to go to the mall with her.

“I need new pants.” She tells him. “You have awesome pants, I need to know where you get them.” It’s cute; it’s sudden; Yoongi snorts.

The pants line seemed a bit of a weak reason to ask Yoongi out specifically. “I do have some very nice pants.” Yoongi says smiling, trying to get Minji to smile back. She does, but not at him; she just directs her gaze downward and smiles a half-grimace. Yoongi continues, “I don't really remember where I got them all, though, I buy pants all over the place.”

Minji nods. “That's fine. You probably go someplace more often than others, do you?”

Yoongi shifts his weight from one foot to the other, “I guess.” he says. “What kind of pants are you looking for? Men's? I'm a boy.”

Minji breaks the world record for shortest and quietest laugh. “Men's pants have nicer pockets.” she responds.

Yoongi had only heard rumours about the horrors of women's clothing. “Okay, fair.” he says. “Do you want me to pick you up and we'll drive there?”

“No, I'll meet you there.”

“Do you have a car?”

“I'm going with Wheein.”

“Wheein's coming?”

“Yeah.”

“Sounds like a party.”

Minji smiles a tight smile, “Yeah.” she says.

. . .

Yoongi is waiting patiently in the food court of the mall. He has a small snack to look like he's doing something other than loitering but even looking at it makes him feel sick. There's a nervous flurry in his stomach that he doesn't understand and can't quell. He could be sick, or he could be over thinking. It could also be the giant f*cking crush he has on Minji that he’s still not managed to kick. He plays with the edges of the plastic plate on the table before him, the plastic bending under the pressure of his fingers. He wishes Minji would arrive and everything would go back to how it had been before he had tried to kiss her. He can't even remember what he had been thinking. Probably something stupid.

Yoongi checks his phone for texts, expecting and receiving nothing. Minji and Wheein weren't late yet. They were supposed to meet at the food court at 12:00 and it was now 11:58. Yoongi still impatiently checks his phone approximately every five seconds.

He looks up again to the world around him to look for the others and immediately wishes he hadn't. The first person he recognizes is Hoseok. Hoseok is walking beside someone with a striped shirt and pumpkin orange hair that Yoongi doesn't even recognize at first. They're just far enough away that Yoongi has to squint at the boy’s face in order to piece it together. Soft cheeks, sharp jaw, full lips, and then Yoongi recognizes him.

Apparently, Yoongi can't even leave the house without seeing Jimin anymore. The good news is that today Yoongi is wearing a hat that he can quickly hide his hair under, the bad news is that he hadn't brought a giant newspaper that he could hide behind and pretend to read. Jimin is looking down at his phone but Yoongi doesn't trust Hoseok enough to not point Yoongi out if he recognizes him.

He texts Minji about this terrible inconvenience.

Yoongi:

jimins here and i am about three seconds away from ditching u, r u close?

Minji:

, im like in the food court dont leave

Yoongi:

I'm wearng a disguise so that jimin doesnt recognize me, im the guy wearing a blue snap back and baseball tee

Yoongi doesn't dare look up for Minji in case he reveals his face to Hoseok and Jimin. Instead he plays on his phone, baseball cap lowered over his face and hunched over shoulders. He can't hear the footsteps approach him in the ambient noise of the food court, but he does hear Minji's voice address him as she stands before Yoongi's table. “Yoongi?”

Who Yoongi sees when he look's up is not Minji. It's Jimin. Same striped shirt and everything, except for some reason there’s a blonde wig in his hand and his eyes are wide with worry. Yoongi swallows around the lump in his throat. “Jimin.” He greets.

“Yoongi.” Replies Jimin, “We need to talk.” He takes a deep breath to steady himself.

Dread settles in his stomach as Yoongi’s brain starts to piece the situation together on its own. Blonde wig. Minji’s voice. Jimin sure does look a lot like Minji.

Yoongi presses his lips together, not sure what face he should be making but trying not to screech into the void. Jimin’s eyes are wide and settled on Yoongi, “I-“ he starts and Yoongi is pretty damn sure he doesn’t want Jimin to finish that sentence.

Jimin closes his eyes, taking in a deep breath. “I’m Minji.”

. . .

In retrospect, maybe Yoongi should have known. Minji and Jimin look really alike. Yoongi is looking at Jimin and he’s seeing Minji. They have the same eyes, the same mouth, the same smile and laugh. They both laugh with their entire bodies, smile with all of their features, love with all of their hearts.

It’s just Yoongi’s luck that he would fall for Jimin twice. The universe has a funny way of reminding him that it hates him.

Chapter 10: The Reveal

Chapter Text

Yoongi is looking at a person that manages to somehow look like both Minji and Jimin at the same time. Blonde hair splayed haphazardly over Jimin's head. It doesn't click with him at first; his brain too busy short-circuiting. He just stares stupidly at Jimin as Jimin's shy smile slowly fades from his face as he looks down at Yoongi. Hoseok being there doesn't help, theres just also vaguely Hoseok shaped blob in Yoongi's peripheral that just adds more to the static in Yoongi’s brain. Static that seems to be taking the form of the words:

What the f*ck.

“What the f*ck.” Yoongi says.

Jimin looks down at him uncomfortably, taking this blonde hair from his head. “We need to talk.”

Yoongi finds that words are completely failing him. His brain is cycling through different agrammatical iterations of "Jimin, Minji, same person? The same? What?". None of it is very helpful and Yoongi refuses to process without an explanation from Jimin. “Yeah.” Yoongi says, frowning.

Jimin plays with the blonde wig in his hand, delicately running his hands over the hairs with more care than it looks like his nervous fidgeting should warrant. "I guess the first thing that needs to be explained is why I dressed up as a girl and got a job as a waitress; why I deceived you for so long.”

"That uh-" Yoongi starts a sentence with the intent to finish "sounds like a good place to start”, but his brain is now starting to catch up with him and is making all kind of connections that it immediately forgets like how similar Minji always looked to Jimin, how that week she didn’t have contacts she wore glasses that looked exactly like Jimin’s in high school, how they have exactly the same teeth. And face. He’s looking at Jimin, and the residual hate he feels coiling in his stomach is consistent. But the heartbreak that he had come to associate with Minji is also there, which just creates a whirlwind of feeling terrible and nauseous and kinda sad. Yoongi swallows around the lump in his throat that is beginning to ache in a familiar way. How the hell had Jimin managed to weasel his way into Yoongi's heart f*cking AGAIN? Why does Yoongi feel like his heart is being ripped out of his chest? His brain is still 98% static so it takes Yoongi a while to notice he had stopped mid-sentence and so he finishes "Among other things."

Jimin clears his throat and looks like he valiantly tried to make eye contact with Yoongi and then immediately looks down to the wig in his hands. “Okay so it started as a bet. I needed a job and no one was hiring and Taehyung offered to help me get a spot at the restaurant you guys work at. Of course, the problem with that is that you and I hated each other.”

“I hated you.” Yoongi corrects, surprising himself by speaking. Then a pause. “I hate you.” he amends.

Jimin takes in a sharp intake of breath. He closes his eyes and breathes out slowly shaking his head. “Well actually, I hated you too. But I had a good reason to.”

Anger coils In Yoongi’s chest. Good reason to. “What the f*ck-”

“No, Yoongi hear me out-”

“Are you f*cking serious?”

“Yoongi.” Jimin looks unwarrantedly upset. “Please-” He says, looking at Yoongi with a combination of Jimin’s and Minji’s eyes and Yoongi is lucky that he's made of stone because if he were made of human skin and bones then he would have caved, right there. But he’s not like a cave kind of rock…. He’s like a boulder maybe. Or a small rock like the pebble that took down goliath.

“Yoongi.” Hoseok speaks for the first time since this meeting, tone low and gentle like he’s the voice of reason which is rich because since when is it reasonable to hide from one of your best friends that the girl they have a crush on is Park f*cking Jimin. Hoseok never even gave Yoongi a warning. An ambiguous “Not everyone is who they say they are.” Would have been an adequate queue. Wait- actually, Hoseok had said that to Yoongi like a week ago specifically in reference to Minji. Yoongi is still mad though. Judging by the way Hoseok has been guiltily standing in stoic silence on the sidelines, he is just as guilty as Jimin for this. Maybe more. Hoseok is supposed to be Yoongi’s f*cking friend. “This is difficult for both of you,” Hoseok continues “but you have to hear what Jimin has to say.”

Yoongi clenches his jaw harder.

Jimin draws in a deep breath and looks Yoongi in the eyes. “I never touched your mix tape.”

Yoongi's hands clam up and he stiffens reactively, and Jimin jumps in quickly to finish his thought, drawing hs eyebrows together in soft determination.

“I really didn't. I honestly didn't even know that it was damaged until you told me those few months ago, or told Minji or whatever, when you were talking about 'what an asshole Jimin is'. I had no idea. You never told me.”

Yoongi’s jaw is still taut and his fists still clenched under the table but his heart is beating faster and Yoongi starts to feel the distinct weight of guilt settle in his stomach. Jimin continues "I didn't even believe you at first; you completely caught me off guard. I still can't believe that that's what started this whole thing in the first place.”

Jimin stops talking. Yoongi doesn’t have anything to say so he doesn’t respond. Jimin chews his bottom lip.

"I-In high school I really thought you were mad at me for taking Yunseo's side. I thought you were overreacting to our stupid fight. I thought you'd put a target on my back, started degrading me just for messing up by not listening to you about Yunseo. You never said-" He breaks off as he has to inhale suddenly. "I honestly had no idea and I'm sorry.”

Yoongi's brain isn't giving him anything but incoherent garbage and static so he has to take a few seconds to carefully collect his next words. There's onequestion he still needs to know the answer to. “If you didn't do it, then who did.”

“I-" Jimin starts "I don't know. Maybe Yunseo? I don't know how she did it, and I've been thinking about it since you told me. I know this all seems a bit far-fetched- maybe she never needed to know your passwords if you just left the laptop open while you were at my place? Maybe she guessed it? Wasn't it like Min$uga at the time?” Yoongi winces. It totally was. “I told her about your name Suga once because I thought it would be really cool if you actually became a producer. She was really into music. I know she did generally know how to use music software because she was really into that. Of course, I still have no idea why she did it, or what could possibly motivate her to destroy someone's work like that. I mean, looking back, I know she wasn't a great girlfriend but I never saw her as vengeful or so heartless. I know this sounds like rationalization and you've probably thought it all before, and that's probably why you didn't even try to talk to me about it, you just shut me out which I really wish you hadn't done but it's been five years and, as I realize now, is kinda what you do. sh*t sorry- I didn't mean that. It's what you do when you've given up completely which is kinda what I made you do both as Minji and Jimin and-”

Yoongi raises a hand in the air, like a white flag, to stop Jimin from speaking. His heart is pounding in his ears. Five years later and somehow Yoongi still misses Jimin. Misses the rambling apologies with Jimin's heart in the right place but stretched long by the way Jimin would overthink everything and think he needed to account for every detail. But there's still something in him that hates Jimin. He's hated Jimin for years. Or is that guilt?

According to recent revelations, Jimin had done nothing wrong to him in the first place. Yoongi should be the one apologizing.

Well, nothing except dress up as a completely different person and then be a complete asshole to him, making him believe that there was something inherently wrong about him.

An asshole whom Yoongi fell for anyway.

“Jimin.” Yoongi says slowly, the name tasting weird on his tongue as he speaks it. There's no venom there. There's nothing. “Give me time to think.”

“Of course. I'm sorry.”

“Stop apologizing.” The apologies are getting grating. He starting to get that Jimin is sorry. He doesn't know what to do about it.

Yoongi doesn't even know how he feels. Is he relieved? is he angry? Does he feel bad? Does he feel anything?

Noticing, how ridiculously long he’s been silently delaying a response, Yoongi forces himself to speak. “I-” he says, conscious of how weak it comes out, tripping over the words. “I can’t process this right now. I’m sorry. I need time.”

There's another silence that could be uncomfortable? Is an uncomfortable one where people want to say something but don't know what to say? Because Yoongi doesn't have anything to say, but he also doesn't want to say anything. There is nothing going on in his head, and if there were he certainly is not disposed to get it into words.

"That makes sense" Jiminresponds, wringing the blonde hair in his hands. “Do you have anything you want to say to me?”

Yoongifeels like time is moving on without him, his thoughts caught in a freeze frame of a spit take.

"I'm sorry." he manages out, "For what happened in high school-". Several ways to finish his sentence spring to Yoongi's mind '-I should have trusted you.', '-I hope you were not too hurt, how can I make that up to you?', '-but that was five years ago and this entire time you've been lying to me so I don't think this changes anything', Time stretches on. No one says anything.

"I need time." he eventually says.

"Of course. Yeah. Just like you said. Time."

Yoongi doesn't say anything.

"We'll just- go now." Jimin finishes.

Jimin awkwardly backs off the table. Hoseok says something to him that Yoongi doesn’t catch. And they both leave Yoongi alone at the table with his thoughts.

. . .

Yoongi a weird tightening in his chest, and all he wants to do is lay on his bed, stare listlessly at the ceiling, and be emo. Sadly, he has work to get to.

Jimin. His brain helpfully supplies instead as his eyes glaze over the familiar texture of his own ceiling.

Yes. Yoongi agrees with his brain, but he’s afraid he cannot tolerate this ruminating if it has no ends and Yoongi has been over the numbers 500 times now and he still has no f*cking clue how he’s supposed to feel or react to finding out that his best friend that betrayed him actually did not at the time but kinda had recently anyway? Yoongi barely catches himself from spiraling down into the rumination again just based on that thought. Not today.

Yoongi, determined to generate energy from sheer force of will and the calories left over from dinner last night, makes a move to push himself out of bed and collapses immediately under his own weight.

Jimin. Jimin. Jimin.

What to do about Jimin.

Yoongi’s enemy x2 that he had also fallen for twice. Yoongi wonders if that says anything about him.

Jimin.

Minji.

Yoongi ruminates over the names trying to find significance towards how he should feel based on the names. He finds nothing there. But he does realize suddenly that Min-Ji is Ji-Min backwards and he has a moment where he realizes that he’s the stupidest person on earth. Yoongi, by himself on the floor of his bedroom, presses his lips together and closes his eyes in shame. Wow. f*ck. Always good to be reminded of that every once in a while.

Nope! No this is ridiculous. Yoongi doesn’t need to waste time thinking about how he should feel about his old friend from high school when he has sh*t to do. Like buy his mom a birthday present. And shopping online is super distracting and a great morning routine! Plus, it barely requires moving; just shifting from the bed to the computer desk.

Of course, Yoongi should have considered how much being distracted was going to be an issue as instead of looking for gift ideas, he finds himself impatient, agitated, and scribbling down lyrics as they come up.

There are a few issues that keep resurfacing and Yoongi finds that he keeps cycling through them. Anger at Jimin for lying to him and never outright confronting him, guilt and anger at himself for having villainized and mistreated Jimin five years prior, anger at Yunseo for basically being the cause of every misunderstanding, anger at the world for being so complicated and unforgiving, and relief that Jimin was innocent and Minji had done the best she could with a complicated f*cking situation.

The emotions, unfortunately, do not all come together in a synergistic harmony of understanding and acceptance of the entire situation and the world and its complications; it comes in waves of separate, consecutive, contradictory, highly charged emotional states which buzzes constantly in agitation like its under his skin.

He tries to take his mind off it by making breakfast, but doesn’t get past the getting eggs out of the fridge when he suddenly remembered that one time in high school that Jimin had stayed up with him all night once on Yoongi’s birthday to talk him through an existential crisis even though he had a major test in the morning. That was the friendship he had thrown away so easily. That was Jimin.

Then Yoongi also remembers the time that despite hating him at the time, Minji had, albeit begrudgingly, let him borrow a book from her that was out of print and could only be bought used online for a ridiculous price. She didn't need to do that. She'd hated him. Jimin hated him and had full right to and still pulled through for him when he needed it. What the f*ckis wrong with Yoongi. Jimin had always been so good to him and Yoongihad always been the one in the wrong.Had always been the one hurting Jimin. The parasite.

What is mindboggling to Yoongi, in his current self-hating remorseful emotionally charged state, is how Jimin stopped hating Yoongi. How he ever forgave him.

Yoongi remembers Minji’s reaction to finding out about his mixtape; he’d gotten some measure of satisfaction just from the pure shock on her face; now realizing it meant something completely different. Yoongi tries to wrack his brain to come up with the series of events that explains Jimin’s actions from Jimin’s perspective. Jimin hates Yoongi. Yoongi bothers Jimin about having a friendly working relationship making Jimin hate him more. A rivalry emerges. Eventually, Yoongi stops playing along and tries to be nice. That works. Somehow. Why did that work. Shouldn’t Jimin have hated him even more after Yoongi proved himself to be even more petty and vindictive than in high school when faced with a new enemy?

Maybe Jimin had never actually forgiven Yoongi and just started being nice. Or perhaps Yoongi put in enough effort to be a better person and it had actually worked? Maybe he's not a parasite. He'd tried really f*cking hard to communicate with Jimin in highschool, and he tried really hard with Minji. Is he really so inherently bad that everything he does inadvertently hurts someone, or had Jimin messed up too.Jimin had treated him with such detest which made Yoongi, who was trying very hard at the time thank you very much, feel just super sh*tty about everything he ever was and would ever be. What the f*ck Jimin. That's pretty f*cked up. Yoongi suddenly remembers overhearing Minji listing to Jungkook all the things she hates about Yoongi, and then when she noticed Yoongi listening, looked him straight in the eyes and continued.

Yoongi’s brain runs laps like this around never settling on an emotion or a course of action. Should he be mad at Jimin? Not just for being a dick but for deceiving him all this time. Should he forget it all happened and accept that it was just all based on a five year long, disproportionate misunderstanding? Should he grovel and beg for forgiveness for having abandoned one of his best friends five years ago because he jumped the gun and assumed Jimin, who he knew would never, ruined something so precious to him? Was his mixtape ever that important? What is the bottom line? What was going to come of Yoongi’s relationship with Minji? Did it even matter anymore now that Yoongi knows she’d been lying the entire time? When Yoongi had tried to kiss Minji in the refrigerator that one time did that translate to trying to kiss Jimin – Oh God.

Now all Yoongi feels is embarrassment.

Poor Jimin had to experience all those food puns.

Truly this was how Yoongi truly wronged Jimin.

Speaking of Jimin, should Yoongi – like – text him? He has Minji’s number which he assumes is and has always been Jimin’s number. He could say something like “hey, its Yoongi, what do u say we forget the last 5+ years never happened because its making my head hurt. I guess that means we have to go back to high school and graduate again but you know what, even if I have to redo every single one of my finals I say that’s worth not having to deal with whatever the f*ck mess we’re in now.”

Wait… no that’s terrible.

He texts Hoseok instead, who was there at the incident. He finds out that he’s missed about ten concerned texts from Hoseok,a few from Namjoon, one from Seokjin that just tells him to answer Hoseok, and exactly zero texts from Jimin or Minji or whatever.

The first thing Yoongi says to Hoseok is:

Yoongi:

this is dumb

Hoseok:

I agree

A long time passes where Yoongi tries to figure out if Hoseok has just called him stupid and refusing to check his phone to find out. However, after going to the to eat an apple while staring listlessly out the window for an unreasonable amount of avoidance time, he finally does check his phone to see Hoseok had texted him again.

Hoseok:

how are you feeling?

Yoongi:

I feel f*cking fantastic, how else would i feel

Hoseok:

im not sure i believe that

Yoongi:

yeah well

Hoseok:

So.... ?

are you angry

Yoongi:

yeah

well I think

at myself maybe

maybe at jimin

sometimes

idk

i don’t really think it matters how I feel

Hoseok:

i see

of course it matters

its complicated, yeah?

Yoongi:

you got that the f*ck right

sounds a bit like an excuse tho

is that why you didn’t tell me Minji was jimin the entire time?

because it was “complicated”?

Hoseok:

it was complicated

are you angry with me?

Yoongi doesn’t reply. Eventually his phone buzzes again.

Hoseok:

I wanted to tell you

jimin wanted to do it himself

and i kept telling him to

he kept putting it off

your relationship kept escalating

Yoongi:

how long did you know?

Hoseok:

honestly? It was my idea in the first place

Yoongi:

R U f*ckING KIDDING ME JUNG HOSEOK

Hoseok:

it seemed like a good solution at the time

i thought jimin could be chill about it

we even gave him chill lessons

we underestimated how much spite jimin's tiny body could contain

Yoongi:

...

Hoseok:

are you angry with Jimin?

Yoongi types several messages, all of which he erases. Eventually he gives up. His phone buzzes.

Hoseok:

is that a yes?

Yoongi:

its just

ehhhhhhh

Hoseok:

do you want to talk to me about it

Yoongi:

i want to forget everything happened

just like – not be a person for a while

not have to have emotional reactions to things

Hoseok:

what do you say I come over and we can sit in silence while we play videos games and if you say anything... thats just the way it is... how does that sound?

Yoongi:

that sounds like I love you

i will prepare the snacks

Hoseok:

just like old times

of course, back then jimin would be there too

should i invite Jimin?

Yoongi:

you'd be inviting your grave

Hoseok:

tbh i'd welcome it

im still mad that you fought with Jimin for fIVE YEARS OVER LITERALLY NOTHING

Yoongi snorts at his phone, and immediately regrets it. Hoseok doesn’t deserve Yoongi’s humoured snort of affirmation in reference to Jimin after being an accomplice to Jimin’s deceitful schemes.

Yoongi:

get ur dramatic ass over here

Hoseok:

IM THE DRAMATIC ONE?!

FIVE YEARS YOONGI

Yoongi suppresses a smile at his phone as if Hoseok could sense his good humour through some telekinetic telephone force. It shouldn’t be funny; but somehow, the way Hoseok puts it; it is funny. It suddenly feels a lot less weighted and a lot more ridiculous than whatever Yoongi had been stressing over.

Hoseok:

i cant believe you hid the fact that you thought jimin destroyed your mixtape bc you didnt want to ~ruin jimin~ you srsly think thats something i wouldnt want to know?

Yoongi snorts. Once. Twice. And suddenly Yoongi is laughing. Hands clutching his stomach, full body laughing, perhaps a bit hysterically. It's a release of sorts. There are tears in Yoongi's eyes that he isn't wiping away because he's got both hands on his stomach.Who the f*ck doesn't tell their friends something like that? What the f*ck was he thinking? A lot of the ridiculousness of the situation dawns on him. Jimin disguising himself as an entirely different person because they hated each other that much. Himfinally revealing what made him hate Jimin... to Min-Ji. Jimin not knowing how to reveal himself to Yoongi and angsting about it. Yoongi angsting about having probably ruined his relationship with Minji for any reason.

Yoongi is full out cackling, unable to respond to Hoseok, messaging app open and screen of his phone pressed to his abdomen.

. . .

Spending time with Hoseok is easy. Absolutely no talking gets done, but silence is something Hoseok understands and accepts about Yoongi sometimes. He also understands when Yoongi needs pushing. Yoongi f*cking loves Hoseok. Right now he doesn’t need to be pushed. He needs to relax and spend time not ruminating over the same information over and over.

After around half an hour of gameplay that consists only of quips back and forth about how much they both suck at the game and are completely annihilating each other, Yoongi finally actually says a thing.

“Should I be mad?” he asks suddenly.

“About how much I’m clearly owning you?” Hoseok asks, grinning at the television. “No, you should accept defeat graciously and humbly admit that I’m better at Mario Kart.”

Yoongi snorts as Hoseok immediately runs into a banana and six carts pass him. “Uh huh.” Yoongi says. “Also, no, I mean at Jimin.”

Hoseok glances in Yoongi’s direction. “Also no.”

Yoongi squints at the television, half in concentration and half in suspicion at Hoseok’s words “I feel mad though.”

This time Hoseok doesn’t look away from the screen “I should be mad.” He pauses as he takes a sharp turn in the track. “Five f*cking years Yoongi, and I know you. You would have gone a lifetime.”

Yoongi is about to reply, but realizes all he has to offer is shame. “Yeah.” He admits quietly.

Hoseok sighs, but doesn’t look away from the television. “Yoongi no one is accusing you of over-reacting five years ago. We were in highschool, that mixtape was everything to you, you had a lot of confusing feelings, that’s done with, it’s over.”

Yoongi shakes his head minutely to himself, eyes cast down at the controller in his hands rather than at the race. “That’s not entirely true though, is it? I really f*cked up didn’t I? I really hurt Jimin. That’s why he hated me so much for just as long. He put a lot of faith in me as a friend and I just dropped him, and that is something that still upset him for as long as we stopped talking.”

Hoseok frowns and pauses the game to look at Yoongi.“You and Minji worked through that though, didn’t you? All of this? Wasn't it clear that she forgave you?'

Yoongi blinks. "Uh. No. I mean I guess. I don't know."

"What else is bothering you?"

Yoongichews his bottom lip "He really hated me after that. For years after high school. Minji... really hated me. That... makes more sense now.”

Hoseok is quiet for a second. “Are you mad at him for hating you and treating you like that?”

Yoongi lets out a frustrated sigh “I don't f*cking know.” He thinks about it. “Maybe... f*ck. Not really. I kinda get it."Yoongi starts to remember all the terrible things he had said to Jimin during the Hatred Years. “Holy sh*t Hoseok I was such a f*cking dick to him before and you have no idea.”

“I have some idea.” Hoseok comments.

“And you don't hate me for it?”

Hoseok leans back on the couch. “I was pretty mad at you for a while back in high school if you recall. Eventually, I just figured you hating Jimin was your business since neither of you would tell me what had actually happened.”

“Jimin didn’t tell you what happened?”

“Nothing that made sense with the story you seemed to believe. I thought he must have been leaving something out that he forgot what he did. I stopped asking him eventually.”

“Oh, f*ck I absolutely deserved what Jimin did to me didn't I.”

Hoseok sighs, and positions himself on the couch to look Yoongi in the eye. “Yoongi, you’re talking in circles but the fact is that Jimin doesn't hate you. He really doesn’t. As Minji, he made a mistake of treating you like sh*t without justifying it, just like you did to him in high school. Both of you messed up but that's it. That's the whole story. There's nothing left for you to do now but admit your mistakes and learn from them. Jimin, bless his heart, still likes you.” Hoseok gives Yoongi a meaningful look, raising his eyebrows, “Hell, to me it sounds like he actually wanted you to kiss him, and you clearly still like Jimin so what the f*ck is the problem.”

Yoongi cringes at the memory, but realizes that Hoseok has a point.

What the f*ck is the problem.

“I just-“ Yoongi starts, and immediately digresses. “Ugh f*ck me.” He says instead. “You’re f*ckin right. It just feels weird, I don’t know.” Yoongi searches for the words on the ceiling of the living room. “I mean I hated him for five years for something he didn't do, just to find out I was the one in the wrong the entire time. Where are we now?? Where does that leave us??”

Hoseok shifts his position on the couch “The only way u can find out is if you talk with Jimin.”

Yoongi lets out a guttural noise of unwillingness, but mentally assents, and immediately changes the topic.

“Why’d you pause the game, dude, I was just about to kick your ass.”

. . .

Yoongi decides its been long enough and now he has to bully Jungkook into buying them icecreams after his shift because he always used to do that for Jungkook and now Jungkook is a full adult with a job and ca$h$$. Just like that, that evening, he finds himself on Jungkook’s floor again, on his back with one lonely pillow supporting his head.

After playing with the Snow App on his phone for a good five minutes silently, the floor creaks as Jungkook shifts his position on the carpet, leaning against the bed.

“So.” Jungkook says, and Yoongi glances up from his phone at him. “Jimin was at work today.” Jungkook finishes awkwardly, very obviously referring to Jimin showing up as himself rather than Minji.

“He was.” Yoongi echoes, looking back at his phone.

“Did you see him?” Jungkook asks,

Yoongi has to admit seeing Jimin in Minji’s place had been super disorienting at first when he came into work and found Jimin waiting tables like he’d been there the entire time instead of Minji. Apparently, he had talked to Junmyeon about no longer coming to work as Minji and also had talked to him about no longer sharing cleaning shifts with Yoongi. That had kinda thrown Yoongi off, though he couldn’t blame Jimin for wanting to escape the suffocating, pervasive, awkward silence that had become their routine on those nights.

“I saw him.” Yoongi says reservedly.

“You didn’t talk to him?”

Truthfully Yoongi had almost amped himself up enough to say something almost twenty times and failed every time.

“No.” he begrudgingly answers.

“Okay.” .Jungkook clears his throat. “So, are you going to talk to him?”

“I uh,” Yoongi changes the filter on his phone to one with cat ears, “yeah, I'll get there.”

Jungkook pauses, “When?”

Yoongi rolls his head to press his cheek into the pillow and look lifelessly in Jungkook’s general direction. “I don't f*cking know.”

The blurry image in the corner of Yoongi’s eye that is Jungkook bites his lip. “You should,” he pauses, “probably do it soon.”

Yoongi rolls his head back to stare at his phone. “Yeah.”

There is an awkward pause again as Jungkook searches for words. “Are-“ he starts, stumbling a bit “You going to? Talk-talk to him soon I mean?”

“Jungkook.” Yoongi whines, turning on the video capture on his phone to record himself laying on the floor and pouting with cat ears. “I am a pretty kitty, I shouldn’t have to deal with this human social nonsense.”

Jungkook snorts, “Send that to me as evidence and I’ll consider it.”

. . .

Of course, Yoongi is eventually going to talk to Jimin, but how is he going to do that if he hasn’t been to Seokjin’s bakery in almost a month now. Between work, and hours spent in the self-hating despair, Yoongi hasn’t gotten a single one of Seokjin’s legendary blueberry muffins that has the entire town buying out his stock every single day.

The first person he sees upon entering is Heeyeon who is up to her usual behavior (flirting with the regular customer Byulyi, who comes in every day at 7:30 sharp Heeyeon assures him). He speaks to the two of them for a bit and they get into a heated debate over whether Yoongi should get the muffin the came here for the strict purpose of doing damn it, or getting one of the new specialty sweet rolls. Heeyeon keeps telling him to trust her, and Byulyi gives her personal anecdote that going for the sweet roll on Heeyeon’s recommendation changed her life for the better and she will never taste anything as sweet again. Heeyeon immediately responds “Then you haven’t tried tasting me.” And Yoongi takes that as his cue to immediately, gracefully exist the conversation by asking for Seokjin.

Soekjin is busy with morning preparations and so Yoongi sits at one of the bakery tables with his blueberry muffin and a complementary sweet roll, both of which he nibbles on politely. After an entire character progression arc where Yoongi has to admit to himself that the sweet roll is actually a top contender for one of the greatest things he’s ever tasted, and has to struggle against himself to admit that to Heeyeon in some way, Seokjin comes and sits in the seat across from him.

“You're being so dramatic.” Are the first words that come out of Seokjin’s mouth.

Yoongi sputters, “Sweet rolls aren’t usually my cup of tea, I was perfectly justified-“

Seokjin cuts him off, “What? I meant about Jimin.”

Yoongi clamps his mouth shut. “Oh.” he offers.

“Were you here for some other reason than to complain to me about having to talk to Jimin?”

Yoongi licks his lips and innocently looks around the store and not at Seokjin. “No.”

“Like I said; you’re dramatic.”

“I am not”

“Yoongi. Talk to Jimin.”

Yoongi frowns petulantly at the half eaten muffin before him.

Soekjin sighs, “He thinks you still hate him, just talk to him.”

“Maybe I do hate him.” Yoongi asserts, still looking down.

Seokjin just gives Yoongi an unruffled look, and then follows Yoongi’s gaze to observe the muffin and lack of sweet roll. “I see you ate the entire new specialty sweet rollbefore you finished the muffin? Pretty amazing huh? That’s an original recipe you know. Came from the heart.”

Yoongi blows air out of his mouth. “It was awful and you’re awful.”

Soekjin’s jaw drops in scandal. “THEYRE THE BEST SWEET ROLLS THAT HAVE EVER EXISTED AND YOU’LL NEVER EAT ONE AGAIN GET OUT OF MY BAKERY!”

And with that Seokjin kicks Yoongi out of his bakery. Good riddance.

…

Today Yoongi’s gonna do it. Today Yoongi’s gonna f*cking do it. He's gonna talk to Jimin. Not just today but like this second. This very second that Yoongi has been waiting for for two hours because that's when Jimin gets off work and Yoongi can speak to him. Jimin is strolling through the restaurant about to head home, and Yoongi is just a few metres away from the door at a table and Jesus Christ Jimin is really close to the door Yoongi should really say something-

"Jimin!" Yoongi calls out, and the look of genuine surprise on Jimin's face is worth the mini heart that Yoongi is having right now at this very second that he could very well die from. Jimin’s eyes are wide as he stops short halfway through the door. He takes a step back so that he is entirely still on the same side of the door as Yoongi. Unassuming, soft.

Yoongi’s heart is going a mile a minute. He’ll be lucky if he can get out a sentence with the weird dance his nerves are doing on his vocal chords.

Jimin blinks. “Yes?”

Yoongi forces out a cough. "Can I walk you home?"

Chapter 11: Love is Worth is and You're Worth It

Chapter Text

“Can I walk you home?” the words come out a little stumblyas Yoongi calls from his chair. His phone that he had been playing with now held loosely in his hands.

Jimin jumps almost imperceptibly, and he turns to face Yoongi, “Um.” His forehead creases as he blinks “I- uh- yeah of course. I was just heading out now- “His voice is high-strung, as he stands frozen in the door, eyes wide.

Yoongi pushes his chair back, highly aware of the squeak as it interrupts and obscures his gracious response “You don’t have to act so awkward we’ve been friends for the last several months apparently.”

“Oh. Sorry.” says Jimin, holding the door open for Yoongi to go ahead of him. Oops. Yoongi hadn't meant that to be a petty jab. Off to a great start. He says nothing as he gets up to move by Jimin towards the door to the outside.

Yoongi tries to clear his head “It’s fine.” he articulates eloquently.

“Are you-” Jimin starts and breaks off, and Yoongi pauses at the door, hand on the bar “are you just going to leave your car here?” Jimin finishes.

Yoongi blinks. He hadn’t really considered that; he just figured he would walk Jimin to his house and then walk back here for his car and drive home. He’d already waited two hours just so he could leave at the same time as Jimin, the extra walking didn’t seem like a problem at all. But the way Jimin asked made it seem weird that he was going to walk to his house and then come back. Was that weird? Wouldn’t it then also be weird to wait for two hours just to ask someone to walk them home? Yoongi mindlessly pushes the door open far enough to walk out of the building.

“Yeah.” He answers, while Jimin ambles past him as he holds the door open.

“Okay.” Jimin says “It’s about a thirty-minute walk if that’s okay.”

Yoongi knew that. “I knew that.” He says.

Jimin stops outside the door. “Just making sure.” He runs his hands through his hair quickly.

“Yeah.”

“I’ll lead the way.”

Nothing gets said within the first few minutes of walking. Yoongi is sure there are a million things to say but all the things his brain provides him with just seem off for some reason. He wants to apologize ut he also feels like that is the only thing he has been doing with Jimin lately. Mutual apologies. Jimin continues to also not saying anything, but then again it is not his responsibility to since Yoongi had been the one to initiate this walk thing in the first place. Their pace is as slow as the conversation, as they trudge down the wind chilled streets, autumn leaves crunching under their feet.

Jimin clears his throat suddenly, “Okay Yoongi I know I’ve said this probably too often but I’m really f*cking sorry.”

Yoongi frowns. Damn it. Not another apology session. He still feels sorry, but he feels like he has said it often enough that the words mean less. “Jimin really its okay,” he consoles, “I haven’t been mad at you; just sorting stuff out.”

“Right.” Says Jimin.

“I’m sorry that I was a dick to you in high school.” Yoongi offers.

Jimin frowns in response “That’s not something I blame you for. It would have been a lot to process.”

“No need for apologies then.” Yoongi concludes.

Jimin shakes his head minutely. “Well-” He says. “If I could I would like to get something off my chest.”

Jimin stops on the sidewalk, breifly touching Yoongi's arm to get him to turn around and stop before him. Jimin puffs up his cheeks, blowing air out of his mouth. “For a long time, after you told me about your mixtape I was mad at you. While it helped me understand why you blocked me out in high school I thought when I saw you I was looking at f*cking coward, who abandoned me when I needed him because he couldn’t suck it up for five seconds to talk to me. I hated thinking that. I knew it was not true. But I still angry.

Then other days I just saw someone that I alone hurt and screwed over. It’s hard to consolidate those feelings. It took me an indefensibly long time to – to get over it. Everything got so convoluted in my own head, so much that I didn’t even realize I was on the path to cause the most harm to you. That’s what I want to apologize for. For being angry and weak. I’m f*cking sorry Yoongi. I’m so f*cking sorry that I don’t deserve your forgiveness because I to this day I still feel angry and guilty. I’m over it but I’m still hurt. It’s been five f*cking years and I don’t know how to stop.”

A lot of things click for Yoongi in that moment. The conflicting thoughts and feelings he’d been having. Apparently, the five years in between had done very little to change what had happened in high school. They were both hurt. They both acted out. Jimin chews his bottom lip as Yoongi collects his thoughts. “You don’t have to be sorry for being hurt.” He says. “I-I messed up. In more ways than one. You’re not wrong to think I am a coward for running away from you. I was. Something in me knew I was messing up and I still locked you out like that. I know it happened five years ago, but to meI've relived that decision every f*cking day. I don't think acknowleding that what I did was wrong and hurtful, negates that what I did was understandable. In retrospect, I would do anything to take it back, and I like to think I learned something from it. But it hurt. And you didn’t deserve that.”

“I’m glad you told me so that I can tell you that you’re not wrong. You’re not wrong to feel anything. Once thing I’ve learned from my twenty-four years on earth is feelings don’t make any f*cking sense. I messed up a lot. In the same way while I think I understand why you did what you did, I can’t claim that you did nothing wrong. It’s-. It’s just not black and white.”

“We- uh. We f*cked up. In retrospect neither of us handled the situation very well but I can’t say either of us did worse. I don’t know what else to say except that it was difficult, we both got hurt, and we’ve both tried to grow from the experience. I don’t know about you, so it is your choice, but I, for one, would really like to try again. With you.”

The air is tense between them. Yoongi is never particularly articulate except when he is writing lyrics, so he tries to avoid speaking his mind on random streets off the cuff. He doesn't even know if what he just said makes sense.

The worried creases in Jimin's eyes dissipate, “Oh.” Jimin almost whispers. “I would like that too.”

After that the walk devolves into silence again, only this time it feels like there really is nothing to say. The silence is grating and of infinite length shoved into the short time. Convergent infinity had never felt so palpable. Time is infinite discomfort. Terrible. Yoongi keeps trudging along. They are not even close to halfway there yet. Yoongi glances over to Jimin and Jimin’s eyes flicker up, cast sideways at Yoongi rather than at the sidewalk, and then away again.

“So.” Yoongi says, now looking up at the sky rather than Jimin, hands in his pockets. “How are you?”

After a moment’s contemplation “I’m good,” comes Jimin’s delayed response. “um. How are you?”

“Fine.” Yoongi responds, failing to fill the pervasive silence with anything insightful or witty. “Good. Good. Um.” He fills the silence with instead, “You’re – uh – in college now right?” Yoongi god damn well knows that Jimin is in his 2^nd year of college for dance, because Taehyung, and therefore also Jungkook never shut the hell up about it, but this information is also something Yoongi has never even once talked to Jimin about.

“Yeah!” Jimin pipes up. “I’m in dance! Just like I said I wanted to do in high school.”

“Oh sh*t, you are following the dream.” Yoongi supplies helpfully.

“Yup.” Jimin’s shoe makes a sudden as it skids on the sidewalk, as if he had just kicked the ground. “It’s pretty cool.”

Yoongi resists the urge to scratch the back of his neck. “Do you – do you like it?”

“It’s f*cking hard.” Jimin snorts, “but I guess I didn’t expect anything different.” He pauses, collecting thoughts and its something familiar about the air around Jimin; Yoongi knows not to interrupt. “but yeah.” He says eventually. “I do really like it. I’m glad to actually be doing it.”

“I am happy for you.”

“Thanks.”

The silence stretches on again. Yoongi attempts to makes conversation again, floundering for a topic. “After high school-“ he starts, “Did you ever get that dog and name it Private”

Jimin snorts a surpised laugh at that, stopping on the pavement to cover his face with his hands. “Oh my god. I’d completely forgotten about that. That was the worst running joke I ever made why would you bring that back.” He takes his hands from his eyes to reveal his forlorn expression that comes from the rebirth of a terrible play on words. “And no- my landlord doesn’t let me keep pets, but right now Tae and I have our eyes on a Pomeranian at the pound and we were planning to change her name to ‘Sof’.”

“Sof” Yoongi repeats.

“Yeah, like ‘Sofia’ but also like ‘soft’ Tae agrees any other name would be a disservice to the floof.”

“It would be.” Yoongi confirms.

“It would.” Jimin says.

Yoongi tells himself not to bring back another play on words, but cannot help himself, “I still think that the best dog name-“

JImin stops him. “Yoongi no. If you make the same joke you made every day in middle school I swear to God.”

Yoongi feigns consideration. “Okay but it would be a good idea-”

“Yoongi I know where this is going, and if you finish that sentence I’ll know you haven’t matured since f*cking middle school. I’m not f*cking naming my dog ‘ejacul*tion’.”

“No one would know, Jimin, that’s the beauty. Because they would just call him ‘Jack’.”

“Name your own dog that.”

“What the hell Jimin, no. I have class.”

“I changed my mind. Actually, I’m going to name my next dog ‘f*ck You’ in your honour.”

“f*ck me in my what?”

“f*ck you.”

“Jimin, you’re going to have to be more specific. Where are you going to f*ck me?”

Jimin snorts quietly to himself, a bit flustered, a bit at a loss for words. Eventually he makes the greatest reference known to man: “Wait – Who’s on first?”

Yoongi is caught a bit off-guard. He lets out a laugh that sounds a bit like a cough. “Exactly!”

Jimin does his best to stop giggling so he can tell Yoongi “Anyway, I’m serious though. f*ck you.”

“That hurts.”

It’s quiet for a bit again. But its not uncomfortable anymore. It’s familiar, and yet it’s new.“Did you – uh – “ Jimin starts after a few moments, “Did you hear whats been going on with Wendy and Seulgi?”

“Wendy and Seulgi?!” Is surprised by the sudden mention of his coworkers, for as long as Yoongi had known them he had considered them to be an inseparable pair. Jimin’s wording throws him off. “No, what happened between them?”

“Oh, nothing bad! But they’re f*cking gay.” Jimin elaborates

“I knew that-“

“No I mean, they’re dating now.”

“WHAT?!”

. . .

“I’m telling you, Jimin, Hedwig was a Slytherin.” Yoongi tells Jimin as they approach Jimin’s apartment building.

“For the last time, owls eat snakes.” Jimin argues, “It’s not rocket science. If Hedwig was anything she would be a Ravenclaw, on account of being a bird and all.”

“I’m disappointed. That is such a shallow reading of the very clear subtext that J.K. Rowling weaved into her world. Hedwig was a conniving little bastard, it was right under our noses the entire time.”

“How dare you call my interpretation shallow, and in the same breath imply that what distinguishes Slytherins is that they're evil.”

“I didn’t say evil I said conniving, and I stick by it. Slytherins main thing is that they are motivated predominantly to their own ends, and they won’t stop at manipulation to get it.” They’ve stopped next to the front entrance of the apartment. Jimin frowns and crosses his arms as Yoongi continues. “-And that’s Hedwig. And I personally don’t think that Hedwig would be all that deterred by the idea of eating other Slytherins. No loyalty in that bird.”

Jimin purses his lips and shifts his balance from one foot to the other. “Okay.” He says, “While I do think that we’ve established that Hedwig was an evil genius playing master puppeteer with Harry behind the scenes for the majority of the first four books, I just don’t think that it necessarily makes her a Slytherin.”

“I didn’t say that’s what makes her a Slytherin, but she is one.”

Jimin hums and leans against the side of the building. “I’m just not convinced.”

“Better argument than ‘Ravenclaw’ because she’s a bird.” Yoongi mumbles.

“Honestly?” Jimin says in consideration, shufting his footing. “Not really.” Yoongi recoils in preparation to retaliate with a string of offended nonsense syllables, but Jimin continues. “I mean, Ravenclaw and intelligence; owl and wisdom. It’s not that far of a stretch.”

“Another shallow reading!” Yoongi protests. “That has nothing to do with Hedwig as a person. Er- you get it. What, if Malfoy were an owl would he be in Ravenclaw then?”

Jimin shrugs, “I don’t see why not.”

“And you call yourself a fan.” Yoongi shakes his head. “J.K. would be disappointed.”

Jimin ignores him. “All dogs are Hufflepuffs.” He speculates instead.

Yoongi stops to blink and collect his thoughts. “True.” He concedes. He looks out back to the road that he and Jimin had walked from, him and Jimin have just been standing in front of his building like losers who don’t know how to end a conversation like normal people.

The wind picks up a bit, blowing Yoongi’s hair off his forehead, and making him squint and turn back to Jimin, who is looking at the ground. The dimming sunlight glints orange off Jimin’s hair, eyelashes casting shadows on his soft cheeks.

“I should probably head back.” Yoongi mentions.

Jimin nods to the ground and then looks up at Yoongi wearing a smile that wakes up all kinds of feelings in Yoongi. “Yeah. But this was a nice walk. I'm glad we did it.”

“Yeah, of course.” Yoongi automatically responds. “I’ll-” Yoongi takes a step backward toward the road, “See you at work?”

Jimin grins, “Yes.” He says. “You will! And-“ he continues before Yoongi takes too many steps backwards, “Are you going to out with us for Jungkook’s birthday?”

“Oh my god!” Yoongi exclaims, having never even thought of that. This would maybe be the first birthday the seven of them had had in the last five years that hadn’t been complicated and split between Yoongi and Jimin. Usually, Yoongi would skip the party, and just bother Jungkook earlier in the day by either nagging him about it at work or failing that showing up at his house. But that… would not be necessary this year. He doesn't hate Jimin anymore. Whoa. “Yes I am, I wouldn’t miss it!

“Cool.” Yoongi returns Jimin’s smile this time, with a genuine one of his own.

. . .

“Chug chug chug chug!” Taehyung chants, fists raised, grin stretched across his face.

“Tae, it’s 4PM, we’re still at work, and Jungkook’s party isn’t until 11 tonight.” Yoongi chastises, sipping at the tiny drink in his hand that Jimin had given him to sample. It is glorious. Tonight is going to be awesome and Yoongi is going to get plastered on whatever this is.

. . .

“I call it the Wamsa Bananza” A very blurry Jimin that keeps hazing through time slurs, cup threateningly sloshing around in his hand. “Because, not only is it banana flavoured, but it also WHAM!” Jimin shouts and Yoongi jumps, “hits you, fast and hard.”

“I call it-“ Namjoon interjects, sitting a foot away on the floor, raising his cup in the air “-f*cking legendary. Seriously I’ve never gotten drunk off bananas before. Like whaaaaaaaat.” He blinks slowly at the brim of his cup.

Jimin grins sloppily, “Thanks Joonie. Means a lot.”

“I call it-“ Hoseok says, taking Namjoon’s drink out of his hands, “a menace to society.” He tsks when Namjoon’s grabby hands chase it his cup. Then he downs the rest of Namjoon’s drink. “A delicious, but terrible menace.” He shakes his head.

“I call it-“ Yoongi says, pushing himself up onto his wobbly legs, almost falling over in the process, “A menace to my bladder. I really gotta piss.”

Seokjin exclaims “Gross!” at the same time that Namjoon exclaims “Nice!”

“Go fulfill your destiny my man.” Namjoon elaborates and then pauses while Yoongi stumbles backwards on his feet, dizzy from standing. “Or I guess the opposite of fill. Fu-empty” he corrects.

“Thanks.” Yoongi says, shaking his head in a sorry attempt to clear it, and then stumbling off to find the bathroom in Soekjin’s house.

Jimin’s voice comes from behind him “Anyway, where the f*ck is the birthday boy. I haven’t seen his ancient face in centuries. What is he like, 50 now.”

“He just turned twelve!” Yoongi shouts behind himself, compromising his balance in the process, and running into the wall next to him. Thank god for walls or else he would have been toast then. He kisses the wall for helping him. In retrospect that turns out to be a terrible idea because Yoongi did not mean for the kiss to be that sloppy and the wall tastes terrible, and now his saliva is on the wall and he has to make a huge racket about how gross that was, as he coughs and gags.

When Yoongi stops freaking out, finding himself on the floor after nearly pissing himself, Yoongi has a moment to reflect. That was a great question that Jimin had asked. Where the f*ck is Jungkook. He’d left with Taehyung like two hours ago to go get snacks; they should really be back by now.

“Yoongi, are you okay?” Comes Jimin’s voice from the living.

“Yeah, I’m fine.” Yoongi manages out.

“What did you just do?” calls Soekjin.

“Parkour, shut up!” Yoongi calls back.

“You shouldn’t be doing parkour while drunk.” Come Namjoon’s voice.

“Mind your own business.” Yoongi mumbles to himself, while he stands himself up. He has to go upstairs and by the time he can no longer hear the voices of everyone he can see the bathroom door down the hallway from here and it looks closed. Which is pretty bad. He hobbles over to it, hoping the door being closed was some sort of mirage but the bad kind, and is faced with disappointment. Disappointment and a closed door.

Yoongi immediately just sits down on the floor across from the bathroom, sliding down the wall, to drunk to care if this counts as an invasion of privacy to whoever is in there. Serves them right for denying him access to his most basic right. Excreating waste.

Keeping track of time is damn near impossible when you are as drunk as Yoongi, but he is pretty sure the bastard who is in the bathroom is taking nothing short of forever. He is going to die out here. Not because his bladder will overfill and take up too much space. That’s impossible! No. He’s going to pee on the floor and die of embarrassment, all because this f*cking asshole is a dick loser bastard. He lets his head fall back against the wall.

It is then that he hears a very quiet sniff from behind the bathroom door. So soft he could have missed it had he still been thinking about his bladders plans to murder him, but unmistakable. A soft sniff and a quiet sob and Jesus, Yoongi realizes, someone is crying in the bathroom.

f*cking parties man.

Yoongi scoots up to the door and taps the door with his knuckles. “Hey, are you okay in there?”

“Yeah I’m fine.” A soft voice barely permeates the bathroom door, “I’ll be out in a minute.” Then a sniff.

Yoongi knows that voice. He’s known that voice almost his entire life, and this isn’t the first time he’s heard it upset. “Jungkook are you crying at your own birthday party?”

There is a pause in the sniffling on the opposite side of the door. “No.”

“I’m going to try the door,” Yoongi warns Jungkook. “let me know if I have to brace myself to see a dick.”

Yoongi hears a soft wet laugh on the other side of the door as he reaches his hand to the handle. The doorknob, which turns easily in his hands squeaks as Yoongi move to open the door from his position crosslegged on the floor. “You don’t-“ Jungkook starts, as the door creeps open to show his tear stained, but vaguely smiling face “-have to brace yourself to see a dick.”

The room spins a bit due to the physical act of opening the door as Yoongi tried to focus on the figure huddled at the other end of the room. Yoongi looks across the bathroom at a very devastated looking Jungkook who had been missing for the last two hours. So, this is where he went. He is sitting on the floor, half on the rug with his back to the rim of the bathtub and a bundle of toilet paper clenched in his hands. He wipes at one of his cheeks with it, a movement quick and agitated.

“Hey Kooks.” Yoongi says.

“Hi.” Jungkook replies softly.

“What the hell are you doing on the floor?” asks Yoongi.

“I could ask you the same question.” Jungkook retorts.

“Fair.” Yoongi allows.

“I was just-“ Jungkook interrupts himself with a sniff, and quickly wipes at the tip of his nose with his sleeve “-chilling.” He finishes.

“Just chilling.” Yoongi repeats and Jungkook nods.

“You want company to chill with?” Yoongi asks, and Jungkook nods again, looking away from Yoongi and at the end of the rug half underneath him.

Yoongi doesn’t fully stand himself, but gets himself up onto his hands and knees so that he can crawl into the bathroom, close the door behind him. Jungkook snorts at him as he does this.

“Why don’t you stand up?” Jungkook teases. Even when found crying in a bathroom, Jungkook still manages to be a little sh*t.

“To be honest, I wouldn’t trust myself standing. I am really f*cking drunk.” Yoongi answers as he crawls his way over to sit himself beside Jungkook, their arms touching.

Jungkook shifts so that his head is on Yoongi’s shoulder and his hand rests lightly on Yoongi’s arm “You smell like a bar,” he comments, wrinkling his nose up.

“Shut up.” Yoongi says. “Now, what got you here instead if downstairs celebrating your birthday?”

“My birthday was Thursday.” Jungkook replies sassily, instead of answering.

“Then what the f*ck am I doing here.” Yoongi fakes irritation. He makes a move to get up (that definitely would have failed; he does not have the coordination at this point) but Jungkook’s holds weakly to his bicep.

“Can we just-“ Jungkook starts, shifting again now that his position on Yoongi’s shoulder had been compromised by Yoongi’s movement “sit here for a little bit.”

Yoongi sighs dramatically, before knocking his head against Jungkook's. “Of course.” he answers. Yoongi still has to f*cking piss like a racehorse, but that just does not seem to be in the cards for him. Not right now. Bladders can wait. Friends being sad in the bathroom at their own parties can’t.

Yoongi hears Jungkook sniff again and looks down at the mop of brown hair on his shoulder. He listens to the quiet sniffles as they get further and further apart, replaced by deep inhales and shaky exhales. He puts his head on top of Jungkook’s. Sometimes Jungkook just required snuggles, and he was one of the few people Yoongi did not mind giving snuggles to. Yoongi doesn’t have to do or be anything else.

It can’t be more than a few minutes before Jungkook breaks the silence. “I’m so dumb.” He says, breathing out a laugh followed by a large sniff.

“Why are you dumb?” Yoongi asks him, Jungkook’s hair tickling his mouth that he speaks.

“I’m just-” Jungkook starts and breaks off. “dumb.”

Yoongi doesn’t say anything, letting Jungkook finish his thought. “I f*cked up my friendship with Taehyung.”

Yoongi almost scoffs at that. “Like hell you did.”

“No, I did.” Jungkook’s voice cracks at the end and tiny sobs wrack his body again. “I really really did.”

“Aw, Kookie.” Yoongi says, not knowing what else to say. He presses his nose into the crest of Jungkook’s hair. “What did you do that ruined your friendship?”

“I kissed him.”

Yoongi blinks “You-“ his eyebrows pull together. “Oh.”

“I was drunk, and I thought it would be funny, and he looked so f*cking beautiful tonight, Yoongi. Did you see him?”

“I didn’t know you felt that way about him.”

“Yeah. You’re pretty oblivious to that kind of thing.” Jungkook mumbles into Yoongi’s shoulder.

“What.” Yoongi says, playfully nudging Jungkook. “Take that back.”

“Not a chance in hell.” Jungkook answers. “You’re so dramatic about your own romantic endeavours and then you fail to notice it in other people. Jimin being the obvious example.”

Yoongi ignores the Jimin comment in favour of exclaiming “Dramatic?!”

“Don’t act like that reaction doesn’t just confirm exactly what I said.” Jungkook retorts.

Yoongi mocks Jungkook by repeating him in a high pitched voice.

“How are you older than me? Jungkook complains.

“I was born first.” Yoongi explains. “Why are we talking about me suddenly? Weren’t you in the middle of explaining what’s got you sitting alone in the bathroom for the last, I don’t know, hour? How long have you been here?”

Jungkook pouts. “I don’t want to talk about that.”

“You kind of left me on a cliffhanger, so what you kissed Taehyung and now he hates you? What happened between those two plot points? He rejected your advances? Did he get mad at you? Where did he go anyway?”

“I never said he hates me. I told him to go back downstairs, but if he’s not there I don’t know where he went.” Jungkook whispers. “And no.” he takes a deep breath. “He kissed me back. He was perfect Yoongi, he really was. Super understanding. Held my hand all through my first breakdown”

“Through your first breakdown.” Yoongi echoes.

“I just-“ Jungkook takes in a deep breath. “I don't think things were heading there, it might have been weird that my mind went to that, but we were upstairs just in the bedroom, and it kinda just hit me, you know. The realization." Jungkook rambles and Yoongi tries to keep up with what Jungkook is messily getting at. He stops. "I don’t - I don't want to have sex. With anyone. Ever.” He is quiet for the moment that Yoongi uses to piece what Jungkook was saying together. “I’ve never wanted to.”

“I thought,” Jungkook continues. “Maybe when the moment hits me. Maybe when I’m there, with someone I trust who knows me, and knows what I need then I would feel it. Feel the desire. But all I felt was this-“ he stops to collect his thoughts. “There’s no other word for it – this dread. I don’t want people touching me. Not like that. He asked me if he could go further and I just told him no. I couldn’t handle it. It must have been so f*cking confusing for him. I got so distant after that, I couldn’t look him in the eye. I just froze.”

“You think you ruined your friendship with Taehyung because you didn’t want to have sex with him?”

“It sounds stupid when you say it like that.”

“That’s because it is stupid.”

“Easy for you to say. And it’s not just that. I thought I kissed him because it was a split-second decision and it would be funny but when he kissed me back I realized it wasn’t a joke to him and it was never a joke to me. I started thinking about a future with him when his hands started travelling down my sides and I realized he wanted something from me that I could never give him. I could never ask him to give something like that up. People love sex, they never shut up about it.”

Sobs begin to wrack Jungkook's body again, interupting him as he tries to get the words out“I realized I couldn’t ask that of him. That would be such a horrible and selfish thing for me to do, and kissing him was horrible and selfish. And it hit me, I just turned 21, I’m a virgin and will probably always be a virgin because the idea of having sex with anyone is just horrifying to me. I don’t – I just don’t want to do it. And just by kissing one of my best friends I was asking him to give up sex with anyone for me. Just because of some stupid decision I made while I was tipsy. How can I ask anyone to give that up?”

Jungkook is refusing to look at Yoongi, forehead resting on Yoongi’s shoulder, face tilted away. Tiny sobs wrack his body again.

“Ah Jungkook.” Yoongi supplies uselessly. He tries to kiss the top of Jungkook’s head but just like last time it turns out way sloppier than he’d anticipated and he gets a mouth full of hair, which he hisses and spits out.

Jungkook pulls his head down and off Yoongi’s shoulder to side eye him. “What did you even just do?”

“I have to stop doing that.” Yoongi says by way of answer.

Jungkook snorts, snot running out of his nose which he quickly wipes away with the toilet paper that he had been clenching in his hands the entire conversation. Then he sits back up, this time with his head back and looking at the ceiling rather than laying it on Yoongi’s shoulder. He lets out one long exhale.

Yoongi gazes at him for a moment. The uneven rise and fall of Jungkook’s chest as he tries to even his breath again. “I think you overestimate the importance of sex.” Yoongi tells him as earnestly as his drunk slurring of syllables together can muster.

“Yeah right.” Jungkook says, still looking up.

“Kook.” Yoongi says, and Jungkook takes his eyes from the ceiling to look back at Yoongi. “It's true. You should talk to Taehyung about how you’re feeling. After what - five years of friendship I don’t think he’s going to think you’re an asshole because you kissed him when you didn’t want to bang him. He’s a really understanding guy.”

“I know he’s understanding.” Jungkook asserts. “It’s not that I don’t think he would understand. I know that he wouldn’t not date me just because I am not interested in sex. He would be really cool about it, I’m sure. I just can’t ask that of him.”

Yoongi sighs. “I think that would be his choice to make. Anyone would be lucky to give up sex for you Jungkook. Just give them a chance.”

Jungkook doesn’t respond to that.

“Have you-” Yoongi hazards, “ever heard the term asexual?”

Jungkook blinks tears out of his eyes “Yeah I was just hoping that wasn’t me.”

Yoongi’s soul hurts for Jungkook, “From what I hear, it’s not something to be crying in the bathroom over. It’s part of you. So you should celebrate it.”

Just rolls his head to look at the ceiling again. It takes a long time but his breathing steadily gets calmer. Tears stop running down his cheeks. He stops sniffing every half second. Eventually Jungkook speaks again. “I’m glad it’s you who found me.” he says quietly.

“I’m glad it’s you who I found crying in the bathroom.” Yoongi jokes.

“Ha. Funny.” Jungkook retorts, eyes still red and puffy, but looking better. “Oh my god. I just realized. You probably came here because you have to go to the bathroom.”

Yoongi winces, his bladder aches from how full it is. “Don’t remind me.” He says.

. . .

They head back to the party together, once Jungkook’s tears have dried and he can breathe normally again. The conversation they find themselves walking into is top quality.

“I keep getting ads for high heels on my laptop because of you.” Hoseok is telling Jimin.

“If you see any cute ones on the banner, send them my way.” Jimin slurs, sitting crosslegged on the floor, with his head tilted sideways, eyes half lidded. “I f*cking miss high heels.” He mourns, rolling his head back. “They’re painful.” He tells the world above him, “But they’re worth it.”

“No one’s stopping you from wearing high heels.” Namjoon solaces.

“Oh sh*t, you’re right.” Jimin says, tilting his head back to look forward as Yoongi and Jungkook enter the living room.

“JUNGKOOKIE!” Jimin enthuses suddenly, propelling himself backwards onto his hands with the force of his exclamation. “There’s the birthday boy! Where the hell have you been!?”

“Around.” Jungkook answers vaguely. “I see you guys have not been stingy with the alcohol.” He flings himself over the back of one of the living room couches and lands in its empty seat. Damn sober parkour lord. Yoongi leans on the back of the same chair, arms crossed over.

“You are way too sober to be in this room.” Soekjin wisely notes. “Either get a cup and fill it with whatever we have left, or get out. Those are the rules. No exceptions. Not even for you.”

“Much obliged.” Jungkook responds, pushing himself up off the chair to get a drink.

Namjoon shifts in her seat on the living room floor. “Jimin, I’ve been dying to ask this. Did anyone hit on you when you were a chick?”

“Disappointingly, no.” Jimin shakes his head, closing his eyes and frowning. “Wait - Well Yoongi did I guess.”

“You guess?” Hoseok smirks.

“How is that disappointing?!” Yoongi gasps.

Jimin’s eyes widen as he looks at Yoongi. “Oh it wasn’t!”

Hoseok snorts but says nothing as he sips from his drink.

“Why don’t you tell him about it?” prods a suspiciously sober Jungkook, hiding his smile behind his cup. Yoongi is glad to see him, eyes dry, and up to his old shady business.

Jimin nods drunkenly, eyes wide and fixed on Yoongi “It was not an easy task. It took the discipline of a monk not to kiss you,” he elaborates, turning his eyes to look around the rest of the room as he expands his tale. “The way he had his hands playing at my wrists you know. One more word and I would have f*cking caved like the damn straw house from the three little piggies when the wolf huffed and puffed and blew all of my resolve away”

Hoseok makes a face of distaste, “Please stop using that analogy.”

“That’s how I felt though.” Jimin defends.

“You know you’re going to regret this tomorrow” Soekjin mentions, right before sipping from his cup.

“I am not.” Jimin argues, and then his gaze slides over to Yoongi “Yoongi deserves to know how much people want to kiss him. Even if it’s someone that he hates.”

“Yoongi doesn’t hate you.” Hoseok says.

Jimin responds immediately. “Actually, you know what – Honestly, I don’t think Yoongi even hates me. God bless his strange and surprisingly forgiving heart. I don’t know what I did. I think he actually likes me. Am I right on this one Yoongs?”

Yoongi blinks. He can’t let Jimin know that he is unconditionally in love with him. “I guess.” Even with his tinted red cheeks, and the slur in his voice. Jimin is cute as hell.

“Yeah exactly.” Jimin says, “This is why, I want you to know if you slithered your way over here, and made out with me, I would be super into it.”

“Slither?” Jungkook repeats, not giving Yoongi time to respond.

“I know what I said.” Jimin responds.

Yoongi tells teh room, “I think this more speaks to some sort of snake kink, than it has anything to do with me.”

Namjoon adds, “Really, I think if anyone ‘slithered’ their way to Jimin he’d hard pressed to stop himself from throwing himself on them.”

Jimin frowns, but plays along. “Snake kinks have nothing to do with this-“

Soekjin interrupts “But they have something to do with you.”

Jimin huffs. “You’re making me lose my very important train of thought.”

“Train?” Hoseok pesters, “or are you thinking something a bit scalier.”

“I am now!” cries Jimin, hands flying to press his palms to his temples in distress, and scattered chortles sound around the room. “I don't understand why saying slither means I have a massive snake kink.”Jimin complains.

Nimjoon continues the interrogation. “Do you mean a very extreme snake kink, or a kink for massive snakes?”

Soekjin chimes in, “I think we all know what Jimin meant.”

“That’s right, we all know exactly what I meant when I said slither.” Jimin counters, casting hazily irritated glances around the room. “So, we don’t need to discuss in any more.” The room chuckles. “Anyway, Yoongi. I know I’m not Minji and will never live up to her brilliant and gracious legacy. But come smooch me, I’m drunk I need smooching.”

“I wouldn’t kiss a snake f*cker like him.” Hoseok offers. “Tell him to ssssssssstop”

Jungkook gasps. “No that will only make him ssssssssssstronger!”

“I never said I f*cked snakes” Jimin asserts.

“But you never denied it.” Jungkook says.

Jimin tips his head to consider Jungkook. “No. I never did deny it.”

Jungkook continues, “and that’s basically the same thing as admitting to it.”

Jimin purses his lips. “…No….”

“But would you say the opposite?” Jungkook pesters.

“I wouldn’t –“ Jimin stops, “Not say the opposite.” And then he just stares at Jungkook with his eyes squinted for a bit and they face off for definitely too long.

“I think we’re all a bit too drunk for this.” Yoongi wisely observes. “I for one don’t want to make a decision that sober me will regret.”

“Whoa.” Says Namjoon, getting a far off look in his eyes. “That’s deep.”

“No it isn’t.” Yoongi tells him immediately. Namjoon finds depth in the weirdest things when he is even a little inebriated, and Yoongi doesn’t have the patience.

Jimin sighs theatrically at Yoongi, pushing his hair back with his hands “Your loss, cookie nose.”

“Okay,”Hoseok interrupts, “don’t take this the wrong way but I wouldn’t want to make out with someone who just implied they wanted to eat my nose.”

Jimin sighs, folding his hands across his chest. “You guys keep making fun of the way that I talk, and its really starting to hurt my feelings.”

“Shut up, snake f*cker.” Yoongi retorts.

. . .

It is a few days after Jungkook’s party. Jimin had been surprisingly cheery and well spirited which made falling back into sync with him the most natural thing in the world. For the first time in maybe years, Yoongi feels a lot of weight lifted off his shoulders. The weight of Yoongi’s past with Jimin, no longer dark and looming, the dissonance that he had come to associate with daily existence. It feels hard to explain but maybe Yoongi doesn’t feel as universally dislikable. As much a inconsolable f*ck up with a personal secret. It’s a really relieving feeling.

Yoongi is finishing up his daily cleanup when a cheery “Hey”, comes from over Yoongi’s shoulder.

“Jimin.” Yoongi greets. “What are you still doing here?”

“I’m here to ask you a question!” Jimin meanders, peering over his shoulder as he packs up some of the ingredients.

“And to what do I owe the honor?” Yoongi asks, continuing to work.

“Are you free tomorrow?” Jimin tips up onto the balls of his feet to peek his head up beside Yoongi.

“Yes, it’s a holiday.” Yoongi states.

Jimin doesn’t falter, “I mean do you have plans?”

Yoongi tilts his head to eye Jimin, finding his face directly over his shoulder and now mere inches away “No.”

“I was gonna ask if I could take you out?”

That surprises Yoongi. Yoongi turns the full distance around unflinching at the close proximity when Jimin does not back away, grinning at him. Yoongi absolutely does not immediately think about how cute that is. “Like a date?” he asks.

“Yeah.” Jimin shrugs innocently, “like a date.”

“As in you will pay for dinner?” Yoongi continues.

“No you’re paying.” Jimin ribs, clearly failing at trying not to smile.

Yoongi has stopped working, his back to the counter and his hands bracing against the ridge. “Why would I go out with you, if I have to pay for both of our meals?” Yoongi asks suspiciously.

“Because you want to go on a date with me?” Jimin endeavors, squinting an eye playfully.

Jimin has got him there. “You’re not wrong.” Yoongi admits and Jimin’s innocent smile widens to a genuine grin. It feels so natural to have Jimin playing flirtatiously with him that Yoongi barely registers that Jimin, his Jimin, is asking him out.

“So tomorrow then?” Jimin beams, “Do you want to pick me up at around seven?”

Yoongi knows full well he is the only one with the car “Why does getting asked out by you seem like you’re actually just getting me to do things for you?” he baits.

Jimin winks, which is a far too attractive thing for him to do when his face is within kissing distance. “I’m hoping you can be my Suga-daddy?” he quips.

“The dates off.” Yoongi tells him.

Jimin giggles and bounces back and forth on the balls of his feet. “So. You’ll be at my apartment at seven?”

“I will.” Yoongi admits. “but I won’t be happy about it.”

Instead of answering, Jimin, whose face is still unnervingly close to Yoongi’s gives him a quick peck on the cheek. “See you tomorrow, Yoongs!” he calls as he exits the kitchen

“Get out of my restaurant!” Yoongi calls after him, needing to get in the last word.

. . .

Jimin’s plans turn out to be eating take-out at a park bench overlooking the river, which stretches into timeless smiles and trading stories. It had gotten dark a long time ago, the wind getting colder and stars stretching across the sky. The moon and the park lights serve as the only illumination, casting a silvery glow on the landscape. Jimin had scooted closer to Yoongi for warmth he says and it is not in Yoongi’s vocabulary to refute him.

“Stars are dumb.” Yoongi observes intelligently at one point.

Jimin presses his cheek down on Yoongi’s shoulder, his head brushing against Yoongi’s ear, “Okay. How do you figure?”

Yoongi blows air out of his mouth. “Don’t light up a lot of stuff. Not super bright. Dim.”

Jimin snorts, but replies shortly afterward. “Consider this though – the sun.” he rebuttals.

Yoongi stretches his mouth into a thin line that faces the river and no one can see. “Sun doesn’t count.”

Jimin scoffs, “And why not?”

“Do you see the sun in the night sky?” Yoongi offers the masterful argument. “Not a star.”

“Okay.” Jimin counters, “But the sun is a star.”

Yoongi hums the negative. “No, its definitely the sun.”

Jimin lowers the pitch of his voice. “You’re a star, son.”

Yoongi heightens the pitch of his voice in turn. “But father, I don’t want to be a star. There are billions of stars and they’re all so dim I wanna be a race car driver.”

It becomes apparent to Yoongi in that moment that maybe they are both a bit sleep deprived. Yoongi checks his watch while Jimin replies, chin tilted back and staring emphatically at the night sky, “Son, you’ve always been a star; I gave birth to a star. You’re always gonna be a star whether you like it or not.”

It is 12:47am. Yoongi has to get up for work at 6:00am tomorrow. Damn it. Instead of bringing that up he says, “You gave birth to a star?”

“That’s right.” Jimin replies in his terrible deep voice, “And I’m damn proud of him, but the kid has no foresight”

Yoongi resists refuting him while frowning, “How do you give birth to a star.” He wonders out loud.

“Well it all started with the big bang.” Jimin supplies and then chortles to his own joke.

That is by far the worst joke Yoongi has every heard. He shakes his head in dismay while Jimin giggles to himself on his shoulder. Jimin is definitely sleep deprived. And considering he is just about to start school again while still working at the restaurant it doesn’t come as a surprise.

“We should probably get going. It’s almost 1am.” Yoongi tells the mop of hair and pile of giggles on his shoulder.

The mop of hair slowly falls off his shoulder as Jimin lets his head fall down forward in defeat. “Oh noooo.” He mourns, “I didn’t realize it had gotten that late.”

“I know.” Yoongi says, “Time is dumb.”

Jimin rolls his head back to look at Yoongi, “How do you figure.”

That catches Yoongi off guard. He really does not have anything prepared. “Um. Uh. Passes?” is the only thing he can offer.

Jimin scrutinizes him, taking his words and already running with them. “If it’s passing –“ he reasons. “Then it’s not failing. I’m not one to say grades reflect intelligence but how does that make it dumb?”

Jimin is the worst. “I really don’t know, Jimin.” Yoongi answers honestly.

A smile grows on Jimin’s face and with it a familiar warmth in the pit of Yoongi’s stomach. Jimin may be the absolute worst, but at least he’s damn cute. Jimin lifts his head to sit up on the bench, rolling his head back and stretching both his arms and legs out, waving them around in a way that is a bit ridiculous.

“Jimin,” Yoongi tries, watching Jimin stretch out his hands.

“Yeah?” Jimin asks, turning to blink sleepily at him.

“Before we go. That night at Jungkook’s party. You um. Said some things.”

Jimin raises an eyebrow, mouth parted. “Oh?”

“Yeah.” Yoongi confirms, nerves suddenly getting the best of him and words failing him.

Jimin squints an eye playfully, moving his hand up to rub sleep from his eye. He tilts his head towards his hand, “What kind of things?”

“Just things.” Yoongi says reservedly.

Jimin bites his lip as he smiles and goodness that should not be affecting Yoongi that strongly. He’s looking exclusively at Jimin’s mouth; the way his teeth barely indent his plush bottom lip. He see’s Jimin’s Adam’s apple raise and fall as Jimin swallows.

“Tell me exactly what I said, Yoongi. I want to hear it from you.”Holy sh*t Jimin is toying with him and Yoongi doesn't have it in him to counter because he can't stop looking at JImin's mouth.

Yoongi doesn’t know where Jimin got all this confidence from but he thinks it may have something to do with him being sleep deprived. And oh sh*t the fact that they are literally on a date. Yoongi thinks what is weirder than Jimin’s flirting is how nervous he suddenly is. “Something about little piggies?” Yoongi offers. Smooth.

“You’re not far off.” Jimin gives him.

“I’m not sure what you want me to say.” Yoongi confesses, looking back up at Jimin's eyes. Jimin had said that he wanted to kiss him and Yoongi had been about to ask him if that were true. He has no idea what Jimin wants him to report about the scene.

Jimin tilts his head, eyes flickering down from Yoongi’s eyes. “I want you to tell me-“ his eyes flicker back up. “How much I want to kiss you. I want you to say it. I want you to realize it.”

“Oh.” Says Yoongi.

Jimin grins. “Yeah. Tell me Yoongi. Given your permission, guess how much I want to kiss you.”

Yoongi swallows audibly, throat dry. “Somewhat?” he tries. Most of the time he tries to avoid thinking about how much other people want to kiss him. Seems like a horrifying thing to want to do.

Jimin shakes his head. “You’re going to want to do better than that.”

“A significant amount.” Yoongi tries again, unconsciously moving towards Jimin.

Jimin’s eyes flicker back and forth as he searches Yoongi’s expression, he leans in close. “Seems a bit of a low estimate." he teases, "Try again”

“Just like - so much.” Yoongi says, trying to keep the sarcasm from dripping from his voice. He cannot believe how successful he is letting Jimin be.

Jimin smiles, “I’ll take that.”

“Can we-“ Yoongi starts his question, gesturing at the close proximity between them only to be immediately interrupted.

“Please.” Jimin breathes hot on Yoongi’s mouth, threading his fingers into Yoongi’s raised hand and so Yoongi closes the distance.

For a second their are lips pressed against his own, soft and warm and so sweet and Yoongi is warmed up into his very toes, the skin of his hands where he holds Jimin's tingling. It’s short and it’s chaste and Yoongi thinks it’s over because it is honestly enough to keep him feeling warm tingles all night. But then Jimin cups Yoongi’s face in his hands and dips his head to get a better angle and yup!!

The way that Jimin’s hands trace his cheek and hold on tight to his own hand, and the way his mouth is open and warm and inviting, make Yoongi look forward to all the kisses he can steal from him in the future. If he had to, Yoongi would do it all again for this moment. Of course, he'd prefer not to. He is just not going to let that happen.